Because of the school's location, New York became the default choice after graduation without any thought. The first internship in the first summer, the half-year studio, the second internship in the second summer, and the work that has been in place for more than a year, and 70% of the New York projects at work, the past three years have brought me and this Cities are tightly bound together. From time to time, I have the idea of "whether to move to California and try it for a while", but in the end, I was not defeated by the whims of "living elsewhere" and continued to live in the city.
Had dinner with a few friends on a Friday night. They were all good friends of my graduate school, a group of planners, one just came back from Japan, one just came back from a vacation in Italy, one just returned home from a holiday in Chicago for a few days. After a night of nonsense, I inadvertently mentioned a common feeling at the end. At the moment when the plane back to New York landed, everyone couldn't stop scolding: "Damn! What a depressing city!" The last time I went back to Chengdu, I turned off the movie halfway through the trip and started to do psychological construction for myself, so that I would not be overwhelmed by being suddenly thrown to the ground when I landed.
"This country sucks."
""That shitty subway should really go to Transit Museum."
"And look at its president. The city is also not doing any good; it's pointlessly depressing. I don't know why I still live here. I should have hated it so much. But I just can't help loving it, for some reason I just can't."
"We're all in an abusive relationship with the city. You want to get out of it? You won't."
After chatting here, the heart was shattered in an instant, and everyone asked the waiter for another glass of wine. Looking out the window, there was already a long line at the door. Although it is not cold outside, and the wind is warm and humid in rainy days, it is still a matter of great determination to wait for 40 minutes in this cold winter. But the team at the entrance was full of expectations outside the besieged city and a face that had been abused by this city to know how to repay grievances with virtue, and there was no complaint in the body wrapped in the coat. This is a Greek restaurant on the lower east side. It's not an internet celebrity restaurant. In New York's catering industry, it is the level of passers-by, but it can't stop people from eager to try it. They are always looking for the next excitement joint, and always know how to dig something in the deep well of boring life. Whatever was dug up at the end was enough to get them excited.
On my way here from get off work, the younger brother in the same group (actually the same age as me) happened to get into the same car and got off at the same stop. Then the driver didn't know whether it was in the state of TGIF on Friday night or what, and he didn't stop at our stop. We had to get off at the next stop and walk back down the road. A very warm, lovely and youthful southern boy who likes to tell the story of Georgia, where he came from. In my opinion he should belong to a city like sacramento or Charleston, not this pompous New York. But after moving in for about four years, he seemed to accept this state from the bottom of his heart, as if he had really dug something out of the deep well of his life, and always said seriously, "I'm so glad I moved here."
This is my second year working, and my third year living in the city, and I'm so afraid of being caught in a new yorker's cliche: 24/7, you're either looking for new apartment, new job, or a new partner. New Years At the very beginning, in fact, I had already begun to be moved. I wanted to change to a better apartment, I wanted to have a friend or partner who could share my life, and I was also considering whether to change a job. However, there is still no action so far. The self who is unwilling to be abused is still stubbornly resisting, and is still convincing himself in his own way that lasting beauty only comes from the continuum, not the impatient artificial disruption. But what is desperate is that this cruel city never promises you that you will get what you do. She is just tying you here. "Release the big responsibility", still a question mark. Whether the "continuum" you have worked so hard to maintain can bring you lasting beauty, and whether this city can give you the answer, will mess up your youthful position in the logic of sufficient and unnecessary, necessary and unsufficiency.
However, what makes people happy is that New York is no longer the Sex and the City it used to be. More and more people are resisting this attitude, and it is not as extreme as you're either a business man or a hipster before. More and more people are exploring the possibility of in-betweeness, more and more people are willing to take the initiative to choose a relationship with this city, and more and more people love her passionately and criticize her passionately. . All of this complicates the city, and as the person who designed it, you have to complicate it too.
Working 365 days a year, looking at the city in one pose or another, the brief New York shot at the end of the film is almost effortless to recognize where it is. I don't know if the lady bird's feelings about New York will change in a few years, but the moment she came out of the church to leave a message to her mother, she probably began to understand the structure the city built for her and Northern California. That warm city is different. When I read "Gone with the Wind" for the first time in junior high school, I couldn't understand why Scarlett was always reading about her Tara Manor. When she was most desperate and tearing herself to pieces, she could still persevere because she thought that Tara Manor was waiting for her. . After more than ten years, I read it again some time ago. This time I finally understand the relationship between Tara's land and her, which is actually the same as the relationship between Sacramento and lady bird. Of course, our lady bird is still very young now. After a few more experiences and living in this city for a while, she can probably understand what Sacramento and her mother mean to her.
There are many types and many forms of human attachment styles. But attachment to land and air is probably the most intangible and the most difficult to articulate. The first time Lady bird drove to experience the Sacramento she grew up with, she was actually expressing this attachment. This attachment is given by the humble and benevolent city, the rough and vast field, the low-temperature and inclusive sunshine, It's a giving that "enhances the other's sense of aliveness by enhancing his own sense of aliveness. He does not give in order to receive; giving is in itself exquisite joy." It is the opposite of abusive, artistic but serious and serious at the same time, which is my ideal relationship gesture.
As for a city like New York, I still love her, and because I love her, I am willing to go to the East Village to watch this movie alone in the cold wind on a Saturday night of minus ten degrees, and I am willing to scold the chaotic people every day On the other hand, she studies and thinks about designing her transportation system every day, so that she is willing to continue living here after realizing the existence of an abusive relationship, and can watch her hometown go farther and farther, and her sincere friends leave one after another, and she still chooses to stay. Down. Of course, this stay is not forever, and I will always hope to be attached to a piece of land, a piece of pastoral land.
One of the days I was most afraid of, someone asked me: "Will the pastoral gardens fail to return?"
View more about Lady Bird reviews
