you will never be your loser

Last year, I was on a diet to lose weight for a period of time. I strictly controlled my diet, gave up my favorite sweets, and watched others eating snacks and supper. I thought that I would lose weight after this period. At that time, the mood was always very unstable, perhaps because of the lack of sweetness and mania, plus anxiety about the future, and a long phone call with a Virgo girl, like a mental patient sitting in the corner building of the safety exit and occasionally crying. Yelling on the phone. Later, I forgot what the reason was, and suddenly gave up. Going to weigh myself, I lost a lot of weight after more than a month of perseverance, but I can eat back to my original weight after two normal meals, so I bought a bag of sweets, chocolate Oreo Fun Dodo Melisu MM Bean Donkey Rolling Honey Twist, eat all the sweets while walking on the playground.
I never dieted again after that.
I told them I don't want to lose weight. They asked why, and I said I was just afraid of sticking with it for so long with no results, while others can get things just casually. And mom said, that's not what you deserve, you just try.
So I gave up quitting sweets, and occasionally exercised. After overeating, I could return to a reasonable weight range, and my mood became very good. I would bring back some snacks in the supermarket that I never dared to visit before. It was also said by Xiao Shuang that she was not fat at all, it really doesn't look good to be so thin.

The mother in the movie said a paragraph, she said, Olivia is Olivia, she has worked hard for a long time, invested everything, can't just take it all away, I know you want to protect her, but Olivia should be Wei is herself.
So why should you be yourself in the eyes of others, why should you persist for so long for a result that others want? Even if your own attempt fails, so at least you will not regret it. As for others, let him go.
And for the things that you insist on, it is wise to give up on things that really will not have results. The father in the movie always said that there are only two kinds of people in the world, one is the winner and the other is the loser. The biggest difference between the two is that the winner will never give up. And Dewey was beside the highway, yelling at the three people on the highway You are fucking losers, but he shouted the most real thing. Bankruptcy, divorce, homosexuality, fat little girl, yellow bus with broken clutch and horn, isn't it a loser? Even if I persisted, what if I borrowed a motorcycle to find a partner in the middle of the night, but the business still did not recover; I was expelled from school and even failed to commit suicide; I was so fat, please, I went to a beauty pageant, and I could play football with a chubby belly. Is it possible to be a winner by insisting on foolishly without even recognizing yourself and the facts? Then there will be no losers in the world.
And Dewey, who did not speak for nine months, used non-violent and non-cooperative methods just to become a pilot, and when his mother gave him permission to go to flight school in exchange for him going to California, he found out that he was colorblind, so he completely collapse. My favorite shot of him rushing downhill and yelling FUCK. Beside such an empty road, such a high roadbed with a yellow bus and a clear blue sky, in front of such a group of pictures, the boy knelt on the ground and cried.
The second thing I like is Dewey's words on the seaside bridge. He said that life is a series of beauty contests, enrolling in school, going to college, and then working. There must be a way, just do what you love to do, and the rest can be fucked.
Maybe one day Dewey will get on the plane himself instead of going through the Air Force School or something, maybe he can only give up because of his color blindness, and in his heart, even if it's just those nine months of silence, he won't judge himself as a loser .
Maybe this is some of Ah Q's spirit, but we always have to rely on it to survive.

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