Xia said that when she was conscious in the ICU ward, she vaguely heard the doctor say it was difficult, and then her mother-in-law was crying and rolling around outside the ward.
But she survived miraculously, but she will need to take insulin for a long time to maintain the body's blood sugar balance in the future.
During a deep chat, she said that she had rested at home for a period of time after the hospital, and asked God countless times why she was me?
Every time I ask, I cry silently. After I shed tears, I continue to eat and sleep. When I wake up, I go for a walk by myself. While walking, I continue to cry silently...
She said that because she was the only one at home during these days, so No one interferes with her, she can do what she wants.
So after these days of crying and sadness, she said that she seemed to be slowly filled with energy, and she also had strength in her heart, and her body and spirit were getting better day by day.
So she continued to work and live. After more than a year, she welcomed her own child. Now she is still alive and beautiful in her life. We always laughed and said that she was an unbeatable Xiaoqiang, a female male among female males.
Xia said that she has always been very grateful for those days when she was crying silently, and those days repaired her.
Another friend Fang, after giving birth to her child, was helped by her mother-in-law and hired a full-time nanny because her husband was overseas. In Fang’s words, because there were many people helping, she was relatively relaxed.
This year, in order to be able to reunite with my husband overseas, I brought my child alone to this country where I didn’t know the place and language.
A few days after I went there, my 2-year-old had a high fever of 40 degrees due to acute rash in a young child. After the fever subsided, the child did not urinate for 4 days because he did not eat or drink. The clinic in this overseas country was not developed enough, so the doctor It is recommended to use normal saline to help the kidneys to urinate, and the child cried when the blood was drawn. The husband and the doctor pressed the child for a while.
Fang said that when she saw the scene in front of her, she suddenly burst into tears...
Fang's husband and they all thought she was crying because she was distressed for the child. Fang said that in addition to distressing the child, she was more I was crying for myself, because I suddenly found that it was impossible for me to be like in China anymore, I had no way out, I had to adapt to this new environment and take my responsibilities.
After crying a lot, I actually felt much better. Without those negative emotions, I started to sing with my child, patted the child lightly, and slowly comforted the child. I was accompanied by this sick child who was very clingy to his mother. Slowly became patient.
In the movie "Inside Out", Popsicle lost his broom car (rocket) and was secretly sad, Lele said it was okay, let's cheer up, everything will be fine in the future, and keep making faces to make Popsicle laugh, but Popsicle is still Mood is very low.
At this time, the worry passed, and I sat next to the popsicle and said: The beloved thing has been taken away and can't be returned. This is indeed a very sad thing.
After listening to it, Popsicle began to tell Youyou how the broom car gave him those happy and wonderful memories, and how he cherished it... At the end of the story, Tao Tao burst into tears while holding Youyou.
Lele looked at it from the side and shook her head, thinking: Youyou always does something wrong, but she comforted Popsicle, but it made Popsicle even sadder.
However, after Popsicle cried, it seemed to be a different person at once, and immediately returned to the silly popsicle before, and began to actively help Lele and Youyouxiang bibimbap to get them back to the brain headquarters.
Lele was very different and asked Youyou: What did you say to him to make him get better so quickly?
Youyou said that I just listened to him and cried with him.
I think all three stories are actually saying: Grief is here to help us heal, and when it comes, the more we can grieve naturally and to the fullest, the better off we will be.
I once read a report that after the Wenchuan earthquake, civil servants who lost their relatives and immediately went into rescue work had a high suicide rate. Many clients who have lost loved ones come to do psychological counseling. In fact, the root cause is often that they have not experienced enough grief. Their grief process is either not accepted and thus blocked, or is forcibly interrupted.
From a psychological point of view, the rituals and procedures of traditional Chinese funerals are necessary to allow the bereaved parties to have enough time to grieve, and to accept the great loss after sufficient grief to start a new life.
Even if we don't experience these sorrows of loss in our lives, we have experienced some small sorrows countless times in our lives, just like the little girl Riley from the movie "Inside Out", she left the city where she lived since she was a child, and came to this incident. In a new city where things are not going well, is this also an experience that makes a child sad and sad?
In the face of the sadness caused by these experiences, if we, like Riley in the film, reject these feelings of sadness and do not accept them, and keep making ourselves happy, in the end, these suppressed emotions will be repressed at the most unexpected moment. Exploding with the most unexpected intensity will instead cause more damage to yourself and make your life fall into greater out of control.
So, there are no bad emotions, only disrespected and unaccepted emotions, anger is good, sadness is good, joy is good, fear is good...
accept these as we think" "Bad" emotions, listen quietly to the information these emotions tell us, and we will also reap a freer life.
At the same time, we should not stop and comfort a person who is sad, accompany him, listen to him, and say to him, cry, cry, this is really sad. Watching him cry enough is the best comfort and love for him.
However, as mothers, have you accepted the emotions of your children? Does the following sound familiar?
"Don't cry, there's nothing to cry about, isn't it because the toy broke?"
"Don't cry, you're a little man, a man doesn't cry!"
"Don't cry, it's not good to cry, A crying child is not a good child!"
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