In the contradiction between reality and love described here, the obstacle that exists is actually our ideology.
When you have a good family education, in fact, when parents have a lot of successful experiences, they want their children to avoid risks and have a successful life, and their children may be able to do it. But that kind of life is a completely customized life, meaningless.
Our society will form certain norms and paths. Based on common life and cooperation, people must abide by such statutes. Gradually, these statutes have become our only reference, and even become our life instruction manual.
Oversocialized people think and act according to the opinions of others, and "how to please everyone" is their first principle. Parents may not have such awareness. For protection and love, they regard these social conventions as their children's talismans. As long as children can be under such constraints, parents can rest assured and children are safe.
However, they all ignore that life requires experience, and life is not about going through the motions.
The trick of ideology is to make you think that you can choose the ideal answer, but in fact, after choosing, you still cannot get real satisfaction and enjoyment, that is still a kind of simulation life under your imagination.
When the spontaneous inner experience is acquired by you unintentionally, it will be an unforgettable imprint of life, and you will be sure that it is real, it does not carry any ideology. When the two made love in the old house, the girl had a sense of fear. This is the unknown realm caused by the loss of control of ideology. However, people have been under the protection of ideology for too long, and completely stepping out of those boundaries will Overwhelmed, scared, and disoriented. In fact, don't worry, life itself will take care of it. At this point, all you have to do is feel the presence that arises in your heart and go with it.
Perhaps in similar situations you will find that you have lost all control over yourself, but in fact that is the way life is. You will see the essence of yourself, remove the usual pretense, and remove the burden of those thoughts. The responsibilities and obligations that you think are not real, because they never happened from the beginning to the end, and even if they did, they were all you heard and said to yourself countless times in your life. These don't have any real feelings.
Because you can't be completely responsible for yourself, and those who listen to their own voices can't be responsible for others. If you insist on being responsible, it only shows the rigidity and rigidity of your heart. Something twists the lives of both sides. This is really scary!
Try to understand your own feelings and the feelings of others, you will find the real existence under the ideology, from the illusory world of logical concepts, return to the life experience full of energy, relaxation and smoothness.
Of course, it is not easy for us to do it after being customized, because the shackles of the rules are all over the back, and the distortion and suppression of the conditioned reflex penetrate into the muscles and joints. You need to encounter the opportunity to unwrap, to be completely released, to be free from the hard, rancid shell.
As long as you have this desire, you continue to look forward to it until the opportunity arises.
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