Before the college entrance examination, I went to the cinema with my wife to watch the newly released DC hero blockbuster "Wonder Woman" (the two have nothing to do with each other) .
Was looking forward to seeing it.
As Marvel's nemesis, the quality of DC's movies in recent years is very uniform -
"Superman: Man of Steel": Throwing the Street
"Superman vs. Batman "
"Suicide Squad": I don't even know my grandma
And after the release of "Wonder Woman", many people-especially DC fans rushed to tell: DC finally stopped hitting the streets! This time, you can punch Iron Man and kick Captain America with a high eyebrow (I'm talking nonsense).
After watching it, my feeling is that this is a movie that uses the heroine's appearance to cover up all the complaints of the movie .
The story goes like this.
Our heroine was born on an alien island full of women. The people of the island country are said to be descendants of the Protoss who avoided the war. Their daily work is: fighting, wrestling, archery, group fights...
As the king of the daughter country, the heroine's mother is...a person who makes me feel quite divided.
For example, she protects her daughter and does not allow her daughter to practice martial arts. After seeing her daughter secretly learning martial arts with the king's sister (and she has been learning for a few years), her sister nodded and agreed, and then said that she would train her daughter ten times and a hundred times more strictly.
(Female host OS: If you open your mouth early, you don’t need to practice secretly)
The purpose of her protection of her daughter was to prevent her from being found by her enemy Ares. Who knew that her daughter would later go out to sea to kill Ares, and she also let her go after a rant.
(So are you trying to avoid Ares or fight Ares?)
According to your stomach, the heroine trains with the strongest queen sister in the country (the wife of President Xiamu), holding the dream of becoming the number one in the world to protect the common people, so as to not be pretentious and very simple, since she was a child, she grew up to become Gal Gadot, and we also started Crazy face all the way...
One day, the male protagonist of the death star escaped and ran to their country, which also attracted the pursuit of the enemy. The beautiful Xanadu has died a large number of female men, and the strongest queen sister died after heroically playing three arrows.
The male protagonist told the people in his daughter's country that he was a German spy, and he stole the poison book of the female sergeant under the command of the German general.
(By the way, there is a god, the country of the heroine is the ancient gods and Amazons. It is estimated that the queen took refuge and gave birth to the heroine for more than 20 years. The outside world has developed from the age of ancient Greek mythology to World War I?)
The heroine thinks that there are wars in the world, and infers that it must be the ghost of Ares to deceive people (I don't know why it is so inferred) . The heroine who has the world's mind decides to go out and kill Ares, so she stole the three god-destroying artifacts ( whip, shield, and knife) and make a deal with the male protagonist: I will take you away, take me to do Ares, and eloped on a boat.
After a serious discussion on the topic of "how do men and women fuck" on the boat, the hero and heroine arrived in London peacefully the next day. This ship must be the earliest automatic wooden ship in the world, without any scientific content.
(The heroine said, "I know the theory of making love and doing things, but I don't have much interest in practical exercises. Oh, you can sleep next to me."
Male lead: "Oh, ah, oh...")
In order not to make the heroine too conspicuous, the male protagonist decides to help the female protagonist change into a comfortable dress. We're idiots the whole time again.
This is the point of the movie. Wonder Woman speaks hundreds of languages, knows the origin of life, knows astronomy and geography, but because she has been isolated from reality for too long, she has made some jokes about bumpkins entering the city. (Students who watch the movie should pay attention, the Wonder Woman here has a silly beauty~)
The male protagonist took the female protagonist to show the bosses the books of the poisonous female strategist, and told everyone to hurry up or we will all be poisoned by gas and explosives~ But naturally, they were laughed at by the brain-dead alliance army and turned away: Although I know They have a conspiracy, but we just don't care.
Just ask if you are cool!
The helpless male protagonist decided to form a team of his own to destroy the poison gas and solve the conspiracy. He found three cool friends!
The alcoholic singer who can play gun
A talkative and deceitful actor (however, the part of this film pretending to be the driver, Asameng, to mix with the enemy army is not as good as his acting skills)
There are also honest Indian chiefs who can recognize the way (there should be the music of Jay Chou's "Indian Turtledove" here)
Then, under the protection of their boss werewolf Lupin (cough), they took the money and left.
(In the future, let this group of waste wood be guarded, everyone is also big-hearted~)
The female protagonist followed the male protagonist through a village where a gun battle was going on. She felt that the male protagonist would be unscrupulous and inhumane if he died, so he decided to kill the opponent and an army alone.
Then, we watched the heroine with a crazy face all the way... Really! over! ! one! indivual! military! Team!
The coolest part of the whole film is here, in all directions, 360 degrees, from hair to toes, fast motion plus various slow motion, just to show Gal Gadot's prosperous beauty!
Everyone excitedly said, "Ah! After a year of fighting, we have finally captured it~" The villagers sang and danced! (The villagers were hiding in the house before?)
After the battle, the heroine was very excited. After dancing with the hero for a while, they... opened the room and reached the great harmony of the universe.
The next day they sneaked into the big general's dance. The heroine decided that the German general was the big boss Ares (I don't know how she deduced it) , and she wanted to kill him, but the hero stopped him because of the overall situation. Mistress, at this moment, the general fired a gas bomb, blowing up the small village from a distance. The villagers were poisoned.
After the female protagonist scolded the male protagonist, she ran to the general's house at night and killed the general. I thought the world would return to peace from now on, but the soldiers didn't want to kill the general, and continued to load poison and send them to bomb.
The heroine's worldview has collapsed: it turns out that killing a person does not bring world peace! (Yeah, what do you think?) Then she gave up on saving the world (hey, don't give up so soon)…
I suspect that the male lead of this film is a spy with a very poor language skills. He explained to the female lead the affairs of men and women, the development of the times, the myth and reality... He couldn't find anything at all, so he couldn't explain to the female lead, we were at war. It has nothing to do with Ares~ I can't persuade the heroine, so I can only stop the poison bomb myself in the end.
Then, one of the most inexplicable bugs in the whole film appeared - Ares really exists, and he is still Lupin the werewolf (where are the Harry Potter movies?) .
Ares told the heroine that you were born by my father and your mother. The weapon of destroying God is not a whip, a shield, a knife... but you, you see that humans are so bad, why don't you join me? Let's destroy the earth together
Of course, the confused heroine fought with Lupin (although I don't know the situation, but the director asked me to fight, I still fight with you) , but obviously not of the same order: Lupin can fly! Will move instantly! Will be invulnerable! how to spell?
Then the heroine was beaten badly.
On the other side, the male protagonist sneaked into the plane and blew himself up and sacrificed himself. Before leaving, he ran to the female protagonist and confessed: "I save today, you save the future! I love you."
(This incident tells us: don't have a relationship with the heroine casually, or it will explode)
The heroine was moved: ah, to defeat Ares is to rely on love (I don't know how this inference came) , so I exploded POWER, the key point is that Lupin is still calling for lightning to smash the heroine, the heroine is like The mobile phone plugged in the power bank sucked the lightning like crazy, and then smashed the lightning back to Lupin, so the half-brother who could fly, teleport, and invulnerable died just like this...
The world has returned to peace, and the German soldier who was inextricably fighting with the male lead's sidekick a second in front of the airport suddenly embraced with a smile and a refreshing smile. The heroine is in the crowd, feeling the existence of love...
(Huh? Huh?)
Then the heroine lived for more than 100 years until now, ready to have a relationship with Superman and Batman... (I'm talking nonsense)
After watching this movie, I have a few thoughts:
01. If it weren't for Gal Gadot's looks, I would really like to fast forward. But it's also because of Gal Gadot's face that people forget to fast forward. (So DC still has a long way to go to fight Marvel)
02. After watching it, people can't help but want to take out "The Fast and the Furious" and revisit it again, and continue to kneel and lick Gal Gadot's various prosperous beauties.
03. I really want to see the special episode of Wonder Woman changing clothes and the full record of opening a room with the male protagonist.
A little digression : After reading some short reviews, many people said with a sour tone that the heroine in "Wonder Woman" is a virgin bitch, which makes me very much doubt whether the people who said these words have brains? Isn't the so-called virgin bitch using others to be disgusting sluts for all kinds of fair reasons? But the Wonder Woman in this film, apart from the inexplicable story, relies on herself to fight, act on her own, and implement the "justice and beliefs" she insists on. Where does the bitch come from?
It is estimated that the people who say "Blessed Mother Bitch" are bitches, and their lives are extremely difficult and gloomy. Let us bless them to explode in place.
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