I was inspired by a woman's point of view on Quora. When she was dating the opposite sex, she would first discuss a question: " If you get married, and you gradually find that the life of two people can't go on after marriage, should you divorce at this time? ? " Whoever chooses to divorce, she will not continue. Her reason is that marriage is full of various problems, complex, contradictory, and suffering together, so the other party must be someone who can persevere together with her. She didn't want to wake up one day and find her partner had left, leaving herself alone with the issues that were supposed to be faced by both parties. When you encounter a problem, you must work hard to solve it and improve it. This is the attitude that people who spend a lifetime together should have.
This contradicts the concept that I have always received information from social networks. Shouldn't people be free? Shouldn't an unsuitable marriage end early? Long-term pain is worse than short-term pain, which is better for both parties. Similar to Gao Xiaosong and Zang Hongfei, who practiced this kind of "freedom", suddenly one day, when they felt that they didn't want to end their days, they took a bag and left. It's really "free," the feeling of treating your partner like air. There is a premise that long pain is worse than short pain, and both parties must agree. When I was a child, I always thought that my mother was not brave enough to get a divorce. If she gets divorced and finds another person, her life would be better than being a widow. She was delayed by her marriage. Later, when I became older and less arrogant, I gradually realized that this is her life, this is her choice, whether active or passive, I am not qualified to judge, and no one is qualified to say that she was delayed by her marriage. Marriage is the transformation of individual destiny into a community of shared destiny. We must slowly live for each other. Stability is originally an advantage of marriage. This is one of the most moving points I watched in "Early and Long".
If there's no empathy, it's screwed, the movie is almost useless, full of old-fashioned self-licking scars. But if you are willing to let go and put yourself into the context of the times at that time, the Liu family is really a brave family. You will find that marriage can change people so well. They are strong, willful, and not afraid of wind and rain. There is no hardship that cannot be endured, and no hardship is unbearable. Lin Lao sighed on the plane: "It's ridiculous, we are still afraid of death. !"
Having suffered all kinds of suffering is the same as having experienced all kinds of blessings.
Women, to sacrifice everything for men, suffer physically and mentally; men also live up to women, and they have to hold on to their teeth. Although the bottom line is lowered, they still struggle to hold on to it in the end. It is especially touching that the stability of such a small person's marriage is the true meaning of love. There is always only one sentence in fairy tales: "Since then, the prince and the princess have lived a happy life". In the true story, they endured one blow after another, losing a child, being laid off, adopting a naughty child, cheating, committing suicide, they shared it all together, and then climbed out.
I always did not understand that European and American women have to pursue 100% control over their reproductive decisions. Women who are single and pregnant feel that neither their family members nor the biological father of their children are qualified to ask or give advice to themselves, only they are qualified make a decision. It is up to you to make up your own mind whether to raise the child alone, raise it with the child's biological father, or adopt a more suitable family for the child. What I didn't understand before is that as the biological father of the child, why is he not qualified to participate in decision-making? Just because you are not married yet, the child's sperm is contributed by yourself. From the point of view of our breaking away from the patriarchy, even if you have contributed your entire body to me, you still have to make a decision when it is time to make a decision. This is the freedom and power of an independent person. If you are not happy, you will not be happy. In this case, no matter what you contribute, my body is my own, and of course I have the independent right to make decisions. I think neither you nor I can provide a suitable environment for the children, so let the infertile gay couple pick them up. Well, they are better parents than themselves.
Watching "Long Time", that seemingly superfluous happy ending is also very timely in terms of breaking away from the limitations of blood.
Why should the child be born?
Their problem is that they are not allowed to have multiple births, which is very frustrating; the problem of the West is that they are not allowed to have abortions, which is also very frustrating. Whether it is to be born or not to be born, it should be a personal choice and individual freedom. But the participation of politics and religion restricts this freedom, which is very uncomfortable. Qin Shihuang, who had the same car and the same book and the same text, was afraid of death, and it was almost because of this that Qin Ershi died. The bunch of emperors in the Ming Dynasty who took medicine indiscriminately were all afraid of death and poisoned themselves. No one can remain decent in the face of death. The ancestral culture of the Chinese allows us to use our family to overcome the anxiety of death, so that we can not be afraid of life and death by spreading branches and leaves before our own death. Family is the last line of defense used by the Chinese to stop the horror of death.
People who are accustomed to this kind of culture are really sympathetic to the obsession with having multiple births or having sons. The lines are too written, but the emotions are restrained, and the overall expression is very compassionate. In this subject matter, the director has thousands of ways to stab the audience a few times, but he is restrained, and he raises the height to provide the audience with a larger vision. "Politics" is the "destiny" of ordinary people. How can you fight against this fate? The powerlessness of the individual can arouse empathy. The various propaganda slogans and formal logic in the film overlap with the present. This is not an insinuation, but it has never left. But in the face of fate, does the individual not struggle? I admire Liu Yaojun and Peiyun very much. They were brave individuals struggling in the era. They have the magnificent temperament of "can be destroyed but not defeated" in Santiago in "The Old Man and the Sea". This movie is about how to deal with family disasters, never give up or give up. Your partner is the most precious comrade in life. Love itself contains hurt, so whether it is family, love or friendship, there are parts of hurt and torture. The key is the ratio of forgiveness to forgiveness. Times are changing, and the stability of marriage is collapsing, which is not necessarily a bad thing, everyone has more choices. But the marriage structure of the ancestors also has many respectable and worth learning parts.
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