Because of my age, I don't dare to write about emotions.
I want to greedily cherish the residual warmth brought by the incense in the alcove, and I always feel that quietly closing my eyes and enjoying alone is more nourishing than saying everything outright.
However, the paradox is that those souls and senses that are deeply soaked by the pulse and the pulse, like the curling green smoke, if they don't take the opportunity to use the wave of emotions to distinguish them clearly, they will disappear in the turbulent flow of time in an instant. , disappeared without a trace.
It's like a good medicine against aging, a miracle against memory annihilation. Those emotions that have been accumulated and washed by the long life experience have faded from the dazzling light, no longer hot, turned into warm and quiet embers, locked in a closed box, buried under the protection of the dust given by the long years, until the right time. At the time, the mottled shell was knocked open again, so that the happy and moved sleeping in it met the light, and Nirvana was born again.
" I once liked a person so passionately that I would ideally call her by her name as an affectionate title. "
" I was awakened just by the sudden heartbeat opposite her in my dream. I fell asleep only by imagining her smile in the dead of night. "
" I had put myself under her name, looked upon her as redemption, I prayed for her response, and I remember the divine light in her eyes after her kiss was over. "
"My life has meaning since then—
meet her,
The stars begin to move, and all things germinate. "
Even those longings, those who took it for granted that the sky and the ocean are eternal, were cruelly left behind—not even deliberately forgotten, just because they were overwhelmed with new things and they were forgotten in the past. locked up.
A locked emotion is a kind of death—the death of the opposite part of oneself.
What is like? how to love?
Akiba recalled the first meeting of the three, and asked Watanabe Hiroko painfully: Obviously I asked you first, if I confessed to you first. What will we be like now?
Everyone has the absolute right to interpret the concept of love, which stems from the most sincere refusal to "no longer lonely" in human nature.
Therefore, people are constantly trying to define, constantly trying to convince themselves that the answer they want is the most correct and true answer, never disregarding this overly absolute pursuit, like thorns clinging to the soul, trapping the parties in a painful barrier among.
Shigeru Akiba was caught off guard by Fujii's confession to Hiroko Watanabe. The behavior of a friend beyond his knowledge caused Shigeru Akiba to throw away his armor and armor in front of Fujii's sudden burst of courage, and lost Hiroko Watanabe by surprise.
He retreated into his own barriers, silently peeping at the love between his best friend and the woman he had a crush on—pain makes people grow, waiting makes people crazy. However, how did he know that Fujii-ki's emotion was just an accumulation of anticipation that had been planned in his heart for more than ten years.
Shigeru Akiba and Shigeru Fujii's mountaineering and excursion are more like a group of people who try to deny, constantly trying to break through the barrier of adventure, they challenge the authority of life and death represented by nature, and through the crisis and achievements brought about by conquest, to numb the fate imposed The severe pain that formed a blood scab under the shackles on his body: Like Akiba Shigeru, Fujii Tree also has a mottled scar in his heart.
In the memories of Hiroko Watanabe, we can see the frailty and slenderness of Fujii. It is not only a shy and hesitant silence, but also a self-deceiving persuasion to oneself and an inability to face true emotions. stalemate.
At the end of "Standing in place for two hours of silence with a ring box in hand", a gentle woman rescued him:
"Let's get married"
"Um"
It was also Hiroko's redemption that Fujii Tree had a clear response. At this moment, he really fell in love with this woman who was similar to his first love but completely different. If there was no emotion for his response, how could he be bound? Bozi's mind?
After that marriage proposal, Fujii Tree was killed in the mountain climbing with Akiba Shigeru. The two close friends had tacit thoughts: " This time I will not miss it again " and " This time maybe I should let go ."
The young hope and despair of young people were cruelly redesigned by fate. Shigeru Akiba regained the opportunity to accompany Hiroko Watanabe, but Fujii Tree failed to retain the amber dream in his short life.
Hiroko Watanabe has the same tenderness as Ms. Fujii, but a different quality: behind the demure surface of Watanabe Hiroko is an extraordinary quality of fantasy. However, Ms. Fujii has a pessimistic and negative sense of reality under her innocent appearance because she experienced the reality of her father's death prematurely. Therefore, Ms. Fujii does not believe in Fujii's love for her, as she is as arbitrary as she denies her love for Fujii-but the feelings have long been quietly rooted in the deepest memory, when she sees life and death when she is in critical condition, "About all The regrets that happened..." What inspired the will to life was the memory of Fujii.
It turned out that the answer to being alone for many years, the answer that refused to pursue, was actually a fantasy that the person who originally liked and purely liked him could come back.
Ms. Fujii happily told the story about the Fujii tree to Watanabe Hiroko, and finally let Watanabe Hiroko realize that this is a unique memory belonging to Ms. Fujii:
In her story, the romantic hero protects her, accompanies her, teases her, and abandons her—even if she refuses the abandonment: smashing the vase on the table that symbolizes the deceased. A 16-year-old girl from the third country defended her budding mood, which she could not yet clearly understand, with the most violent behavior.
Many years later, in her letter to Hiroko Watanabe, Ms. Fujii talked about the mischievous teasing, childish sexual innuendo, shy and gloomy teenagers because of their fights with classmates on the podium. Avoiding casual glances but dodging in panic when touching our own eyes, we can’t tell that this resurrection emotion is melted by the warmth of Hiroko Watanabe’s love for Fujii, frozen by the Otaru snowstorm The ice shell of Ms. Fujii's mind. Or Ms. Fujii finally got the opportunity to open up a story about someone who left without saying goodbye to her despair after a long wait.
More and more memories allow us to piece together the truth of the story. Those fragments are like the burning fragments of stars, scattered in the ocean of time. Ms. Fujii salvaged the broken pictures piece by piece and pieced them together into beautiful memories. Hiroko Watanabe is looking for the answer she wants in it. Is she the afterglow of Fujii's inexorable youth, or the beautiful woman in red shirt running on the cold snowy slope - she loves this Fujii so much, so she can't let her go. As for the willingness to learn about his past.
"My son makes such a good woman jealous of you" Fujii's mother is grateful for the love returned by Hiroko Watanabe. For a mother, her child has been deeply loved by such a beautiful woman, she is careful Doting on Hiroko Watanabe and missing the deceased were healed by Hiroko Watanabe's love. Those frivolous and cunning pretending to be strong finally turned into a whimper in front of Hiroko Watanabe: Missing the mother who lost her beloved son burst.
"Shout it out and vent it out."
Akiba watched the woman in front of him from behind, her red sweater was like the rising sun on the snow-covered hillside. His waiting stems from his deep love: who is not in love with you at first sight?
Watanabe Hiroko tied himself in the death of Fujii tree and couldn't extricate himself. He continued to comfort and accompany him, "Come out and let him go."
He knows that the woman he loves will always have a place in the heart of the person who has passed away, and that there is a small hole in her heart - a regret that cannot be bridged: if. But Akiba Shigeru still didn't care, he was willing to accept all of this, as if the moment before Fujii's death, he sent his tenderness to all those who cared about him: the obsession of " never let go this time " was also followed by Akiba. Inherited by Ye Mao - In the face of Kaji Bear's inquiry, Akiba Shiger said that he would never climb mountains again.
Because part of him died on that mountain with his best friend.
And the rest of him, for fear of losing Hiroko Watanabe, can no longer face the dangerous mountain god.
The other part of the Fujii tree, like the spring rain in Otaru, quietly lingers around Ms. Fujii, waiting for the day she discovers it.
The name of Fujii Tree on the 87 library cards is a silent confession of 87 sentences, " When you say my name, I think of you. "
The portrait quietly hidden behind the library card of "Reminiscence of Homecoming" is the condensation of the most affectionate gaze -- peeking quietly, imagining in my mind, rubbing the paper with my fingertips, I tell you everything I want to say to you. Words become lines, I like you so much.
Question in the letter sent by Hiroko Watanabe: Isn't the same name a kind of fate?
What Ms. Fujii forgot was the grief that the death of her father had done to her. Her ordinary life had become a little dull and closed because of premature exposure to the fact of death. Just like living in a decaying old house, even if the ceiling is about to collapse, they are reluctant to leave. Moving out of this old house belonging to their family of four means giving up the memories of living together with their father, even if they know they want to leave. Going down, he still protested with his silent behavior—huddling in the corner of the house to eat oranges.
It was like when she was sixteen, outside the funeral of her father's death, she saw a frozen dragonfly in the ice. The bright and beautiful life was frozen in the cold ice, and the happy memories of my father and the father represented for a moment were turned into heavy and difficult to face scars because of the painful period. Even in the hospital after a lapse of many years, he could still see his father's dead face in a trance in the ambulance that was pushed into the emergency room.
Death froze her innocence and joy, and an irreparable crack appeared in her originally happy life with her family. When she was sick and had a fever, her mother angrily asked her grandfather: Are you going to kill her like you killed your son? ?
The trauma of the loss of a family member is deeply etched in the hearts of the living, and each of them endured this grief in their own way. The mother wanted to escape from this house, but the grandfather had to stick to the old house. Because he bumped into the hidden emotions of his father's death, he caught a glimpse of the "taboo" on Ms. Fujii's house number and was buried in the womb. It should have been It was the confession's farewell that turned into a gentle wave - the pain spread from Ms. Fujii's heavy smile to Fujii's body: there will be countless times of annoyance, how many times of regret. Only when we meet again, even if people who have similar eyebrows and eyes lose their calm, break through their shyness and introversion, and blurt out "like", it is a fierce release of painful thoughts, and the enthusiasm and sincerity in it touched a similar person. gentle woman.
Sincere emotions are like the power of transmission, Watanabe Hiroko received the emotions from Fujii Tree. There are complex sustenances in that huge attachment, grief, cherish, sweetness, protection, awe and all, in the long years of waiting. , the timeless sincerity of emotion, which is forgiven because of its holiness:
Love is never a product of selfishness. It is characterized by an absoluteness—by sharing and passing, and still not compromising.
That must have been when Hiroko Watanabe saw his own reflection in Fujii's clear eyes when his eyes were facing each other. What can bear love is not just the skin that will eventually break down, but the deeper spirit and heart.
It's like the frankness of Shigeru Akiba's female assistant to Hiroko Watanabe-noble personalities always attract each other: I also like Akiba-sensei, but if it's Miss Watanabe, I believe it's okay.
Cowardly liking is like the breeze that moves Qingping, which quietly breeds in the boyhood when Fujii tree silently stared at Ms. Fujii. It continues to sublimate in the long training and affirmation, and finally turns into a real power, which heals all the people who are suffering. Life hurts people.
This relationship, nurtured by Fujii's life, eventually turned into a gentle force. It makes the mother who lost her child proud, it makes Shigeru Akiba face the opportunity that life gives him, and it protects Hiroko Watanabe's heart and proves that she deserves the best, and it returns to Ms. Fujii through Hiroko. , broke the ice that trapped the dragonfly, and proved to Ms. Fujii that love can transcend time and space. In this world, there has always been a young man at different times and places who quietly miss her, even after leaving the world, This feeling can also be driven by the power created by feelings, breaking the barriers of time and space, breaking the boundaries of life, and finding her side: life can disappear, but those loves are real.
This finally allowed Ms. Fujii to face her father's death calmly, and with the help of Hiroko and Shu, she re-completed the road of redemption with her grandfather and mother.
Cause and effect are like ingenious threads that carelessly connect those who are trapped in pain together.
Love is like a gentle hand, gently stroking, conveying warmth to those tired and cold hearts tortured by life.
In the seemingly cruel sadness and silence, it is the condensation of the power of life flowing in Japanese literature.
People grieve because of the things that have passed, but the things that have passed are actually just melted into the lives of the living in another way.
In the turbulent crowd, Watanabe Hiroko and Miss Fujii passed by. In fact, the voice of an unknown person rang in the ears of Miss Fujii, making her stop and stop to look back.
That call may be in response to the uncertain question in Hiroko Watanabe's heart, perhaps in response to the persistence of Fujii's undead spirit, or in response to the kind expectations of all those who watch the movie.
Watanabe Hiroko and Fujii-san looked at each other across the crowd, but did not recognize each other.
In fact, it is to tell everyone, how can there be people who look exactly the same in this world? Hiroko Watanabe and Miss Fujii only have some similarities. Whether it is in the eyes of Fujii's mother or in the strange driver's license photo, the so-called "similarity" is only for Hiroko Watanabe because of Fujii's deep and persistent The wavering of her thoughts made her bewitched by the unintentional words of a taxi driver. She just found it difficult to give up the person she loved deeply, and she regretted that a relationship could not be fulfilled because of the death of a life.
What Fujii Tree deeply loves is the soul of Hiroko Watanabe, who is kind, gentle and upright like Miss Fujii.
Love, there is never an absolute answer that belongs to oneself,
Those who love each other, with each other, break the attachment with attachment,
It is just that he is constantly proving the excellence of the other party and affirming the other party, because he can be moved by the dedication of the other party.
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