So I remembered Ruifan Phoenix, the fair-haired handsome boy. In the movie, he was not thin, but exuded fragility from the inside out. Whether it is external or internal, he gives people a strong sense of uncertainty. Maybe it came from his uncertain life experience. Whenever he recalled the mother in his childhood memory, he would be sick, narcolepsy, or something else. In short, he would lose consciousness, accompanied by slight convulsions, and lie down anywhere, just like lying in the arms of his mother. . Maybe he will wake up automatically in a few hours, maybe waiting for a call from the voice he needs, maybe just going to sleep forever. The empty field, like a golden wheat field, or just golden withered grass, had a separate house, and his mother stood on the steps in front of the door.
The ever-pervading sense of drifting without a place, this is what this movie left me, only in the feeling, not in the memory. There is also Keanu Reeves in the movie. He is a lofty boy with a long stature, black hair and white skin, and he is incredibly handsome. In the movie, Rui Fan met him in the city, and he began to accompany Rui Fan to search for his mother everywhere, tracing back in the footsteps of Rui Fan.
On the road, one night with a bonfire, Rui Fan hesitated and said, "It’s nothing, it’s good to be friends." His expression was a little sleepy and his eyes seemed to be asking. Finally, he said with difficulty that he could fall in love with someone instead of doing it for Money, "I love you, and you don't have to pay me, I want to kiss you, good night" and then he buried his head deeply and embraced himself with his arms, the campfire was burning, and he was cold because he didn't want to wait for rejection He first rejected himself for the other party. He was bothered by himself, and while confessing himself, he hated himself, as if he wanted to tear himself apart. He repeatedly muttered "You know i do love you", as if he was telling himself. He was helpless and confused. He looked down on himself and convinced himself that he shouldn't expect a chance to get love. Keanu had nothing to do with him, and reluctantly signaled that he could lean on his side. Rui Fan in the movie is just a child who has nothing emotionally. No one can teach him how to think and live. He can only be spoiled, otherwise he will be destroyed.
Between the empty world, people seem so small and lonely, and the only road that leads to nowhere is probably not the home of the most anticipated mother. This movie can be regarded as a half-road movie. It starts with the first scene on the road on the wasteland, and then the two protagonists have been on the road, walking, looking, passing by the city, passing by the same confused people, and drifting away until they part ways. . In the end, Rui Fan fell on a highway, still in the wasteland, and looked the same as the road at the beginning of the movie. It seemed that no matter how far he walked, he couldn't get off the original road. Rui Fan was trapped on the road, trapped in his own memory, fell down again, fell asleep again, and maybe never woke up again. There are still clouds surging in the sky, and the days are fast passing by and never look back.
I will never know whether Rui Fan in reality is the same as him in the movie. I only know that he died at the age of 23. In the movie, he was accompanied by sickness, memory and hallucinations. In reality, he was buried in drugs. In the last years, perhaps before he died, in the transpiration of overdose, while he was still conscious, his consciousness had entered another world ahead of time.
Suddenly realized that he was also a footless bird.
Phoenix, phoenix, and phoenix nirvana may fall into another world, where sadness and happiness are reversed, angels lead all happiness in the night, and hide in the wings of the devil by day. However, Phoenix, in this world you no longer miss, your blooming is far from enough.
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