View more about Arthur Christmas reviews
Full of creativity, lack of spirituality.
Vincent 2022-09-12 16:36:21
-
Grandsanta: [Arthur, Grandsanta & Bryony have just left Idaho with the fake reindeer attached to the sleigh, they are halfway across the Atlantic Ocean] Christmas 1923, I had a heart attack at the reigns. Left ventricle popped out my mouth, pushed it back down and carried on.
Arthur: [looks over the ledge of the sleigh and sees nothing but water all around] Big isn't it? The Atlantic! Do you think we should stop and ask someone?
Grandsanta: Fishy nibbles, come on, we are nearly there!
[points to a slow moving streak of light]
Grandsanta: You see, I take the north star, there, a fixed point, and I plot my bearings...
Bryony: That's a plane, Sir!
Grandsanta: It's a Co-ordination, Elf, I'll have you harpooned!
Arthur: [looks down and sees something that looks like an island disappearing under rising sea levels] I thought it would be chillier here in England?
Grandsanta: Globular Warming.
[Sees land ahead and starts heading for it]
Grandsanta: Hah! There it is! Told you!
Arthur: [They land in Tanzania, Africa] Wow! England?
[a huge beetle crawls over Arthur]
Arthur: Yyaaarrggh!
Grandsanta: Maybe we pullled to the right a bit since we're a reindeer short. France! Bonjour! Ou est la Boulangerie?
Arthur: [Hears an Elephant] They have elephants in France?
Grandsanta: The odd stray, they breed in the drains. Come this way, everyone!
[They look around and realize they landed up in some animal sanctuary]
Grandsanta: Paris zoo?
Bryony: [Lions get agitated and start roaring] This must be where they keep the lions!
[Lions and other animals start marching towards everyone]
-
Santa: [trying to operate the S-1 himself, denting it and jolting it violently, Flashing red lights flash all over the S-1's bridge] OK! 23 Mimosa Avenue, Trelew
Mrs. Santa: [Reading the manual] Reading up! There is no harm in using the manual
Santa: [Agitated, pressing buttons, levers and knobs all over the bridge causing the S-1 to rock and sway violently] Margaret! I Order you to DISEMBARK! It's not safe!
Mrs. Santa: [Trying to calm Santa] I did a microlight flying course on the internet! It can't be that different!
Santa: [Steve appears at the doors to the bridge] Oh! Steve!
Steve: [Santa accidentally leans on a lever and the S-1 jolts more violently] You've DENTED IT! You've taken it out without asking!
Mrs. Santa: [stabilizes the S-1] Malcolm, you told me he knew! You know how Steve feels about his S-1
Santa: [presses more buttons and levers causing it to rock and sway even more violently] It's MY S-1! S for Santa, I'm flying to this child!
Steve: Of course, she is all that matters, not me! Your SON! Not the Two Billion things I didn't write tonight! NOOOoooo!
Santa: This is about the pool table isn't it! I told you that you should have written to me!
Steve: [shouting] I was eight years old! You're my dad!
Mrs. Santa: [shouting] For Goodness sake!
Mrs. Santa: [slams her cup down on the controls] Arthur & Grandsanta are out there probably not wearing nearly enough layers of clothing and you two are bickering over a big red toy!
Santa: I'm... I'm not bickering! If Steven should just Stand back!
[Activates the airbag]
S-1 Computer: [Airbag inflates] Airbag!
Santa: You drive, Steven? Thank you!
Steve: [puts on his S-1 gloves, fires up in the S-1] So! Since gift delivery to child 47785BXK is all that seems to matter, I'll do it all myself, and we'll pick up Arthur and Grandsanta from whatever ditch they've ended up in.
S-1 Computer: [Steve pulls the main lever on the S-1 to go at full throttle] Maximum Velocity!
Steve: Hold on Tight!