From the release of the movie to the day I finally watched it, for a long time, I was deeply dissatisfied with the name of the movie——
How to Be Single
Such a textbook title is really embarrassing.
Moreover, the actual situation is often the following titles, which make people want to dabble-
How to Get Laid;
How to Be in a Relationship;
How to Get Married;
How to Get Pregnant.
Single, that is, being single, in the general cognition, most of them have negative, negative and passive colors.
In the general understanding, not many people will actively hope and request to become single (of course, those who are already in love and married, but live a daily life that is not as good as a dog).
The matter of being single has, in many cases, been forcibly equated by the public and public opinion with the end of marriage and the state of failing to successfully enter into marriage. Many people even directly equate being single with the opposite of marriage and love.
When the world is only black and white, there is no gray field, when we only have love and hatred, how cruel and boring.
Therefore, the more the society tries to instill positive and positive meanings and values into love and marriage, the more negative meanings and unwarranted accusations that the label of singleness needs to carry will become bigger and heavier.
The beginning of the movie is actually quite deadly.
A woman in a stable relationship said to her current boyfriend, "I've had enough of not being single. Before I fell in love, I lived with my parents. After I fell in love, I lived with my boyfriend. I haven't tried living alone, so I'm going to experience it now. What it's like to be single.
Maybe I will write an article in the future, listing all kinds of thoughts of women in love that short-circuit their brains and then die, but the idea of dying in movies has made me inexplicably interested, and the interest is so great that I can forget about it. The title is how uncomfortable I am.
After the article was written, I glanced at my dog subconsciously, imagining that if one day it would talk, and said to me——
You see, I am a sensible person who has been living in your house so far, and I have never experienced the life of a stray dog for a long time. The world is so big, I want to go out and have a look. What do you think of being a stray dog for so long?
I'll probably look at him in tears, and then continue to keep him in captivity at home, adding more walks at the most.
Personally, I don't have a very clear emotional inclination towards being single and being married. I prefer to think that being single and being married is a choice.
We can choose to be single, or we can choose to fall in love and get married. These are two equal states.
But both movies and real life are telling us a lesson that needs to be kept in our hearts. The love world in which our group of men and women live is actually a virgin jungle, full of hunting and being hunted (or more seriously, that is hunting kill and be hunted) relationship.
By the way, when it comes to the definition of men and women, I always find the Japanese classification of "grass-fed" and "meat-fed" particularly interesting.
If you have time, pay attention to the single people around you, classify and summarize their characteristics, you will find that men and women who are 27 years old or above and are still single can basically be roughly divided into "grass-fed" and "meat-eating". ", and "grass-fed" can also be divided into another layer -
" Edible grass -fed " and " inedible grass-fed ".
" Inedible grass-fed " does not mean that they are harmless to humans and animals, but more because of external conditions, which determine that they do not have much edible value. In most cases, "inedible grass-fed" will not be eaten for a long time. The state, bumping into walls everywhere, unhappy.
The single lifespan of " edible herbivores " is shorter. Usually, they are eaten by meat and then thrown off, eaten again and then continued to be thrown off. Repeatedly repeating the tragic role of playing tricks in the scenes of joys and sorrows.
Now that we know grass-eating, the next step is to know the world of meat-eating.
Those who are still single in the prime of life, and whose appearance and other aspects are in the upper-middle level, can usually be classified as carnivorous.
In fact, people are full of warm and beautiful yearning for the unchanging, cycle life. Of course, we can't rule out that there are people who are still single at this age, but they are just herbivores in the koala world who only eat eucalyptus leaves.
But in many cases, the temptation of society for people who are particularly well-off is so great that we can't imagine.
I wrote "Things About Gunslingers" before. It's actually what's happening in the people I know. Real life is not a fairy tale. The dog blood plot.
What's more, those hungry wolves who use love and marriage as sheep's clothing and continue to go out to hunt for food.
After knowing what the beasts in the "suffering" field of Roman "Dating" look like, we will be able to understand a little bit about what kind of environment we are in if we continue to want to fall in love or want to love ourselves after we are single. .
Only when you realize the danger of the environment can you have the opportunity to realize that you are really just a hot head, and then you will understand that it is not really so unrestrained and unrestrained as the "stray" title of a stray dog. It's actually a tragic tragedy.
So, why do we need to know How to Be Single, a skill that is useless?
Liz Tuccillo, one of the screenwriters of the film, wrote the work "He's Just Not That Into You (he doesn't really like you)" that I had seen. At that time, I also thought that there were many dialogues and lines in this film that were very interesting. It's just that the happy ending of the light comedy has nothing to be reminiscent of. On the contrary, those humorous and particularly cruel summaries have benefited me a lot from the bottom of my heart.
This film is actually almost like a remake of "He's Just Not That Into You (he doesn't really like you)". It is a chatter and didactic genre. It can be said to be a black book, or it can be regarded as a bible and an action guide.
But to be honest, as someone with strong heterosexual needs, I don't like having such a guide on how to understand and learn to be single.
Whether it's self-liberation, indulging in lust, or keeping oneself clean, or even not getting involved in the quagmire of marriage, it's a personal choice.
In a long time of being single (mixed with ambiguous and short-term relationships), the biggest gain I have actually learned is the benefits of being on your own.
But being alone is just the beginning. You will gradually gain all the nutrients that an independent personality needs in a large enough time-space environment of solitude: from financial independence to emotional independence, from having private hobbies to knowing how to make the most of free time.
Many people say that distance produces beauty.
The beauty of this distance is largely fictitious without stepping into the so-called distance before a relationship, since both parties may never be in the same space at the same time.
It is only after entering a relationship that one truly understands the meaning of beauty in distance.
And the distance is their respective territory defined as "self".
Whether "I will die without you" or "I will not die without you, but I need you to share my happiness with me" is more appealing, you have to ask yourself.
Including this movie, many publications that provide people with love tutorials are reminding people not to easily let the other party in an ambiguous or love relationship feel that their posture is low.
There's a saying that we've probably all heard...
Don't reply to the text message (WeChat) sent by the other party immediately, otherwise the other party will know that you are waiting for him to find you, and then they will not pay attention to you.
To be honest, of all the love techniques, I probably hate this one the most.
After all, I'm an obsessive-compulsive disorder of "if someone sends a message (WeChat), I have to reply in seconds", this so-called "lady-like reservation", I probably can't learn it in my entire life.
But in fact, judging by the number of calls I've missed, or the number of messages (WeChat) I've accidentally used my mind to reply to, I've acquired this skill unknowingly.
Countless times, I have to rely on fate to decide whether I can receive a call from the other party. I said that I really did not intend to buffer anything, but that I had my own things to do (even if it was idle and boring).
Yes, I live my own life, not relying on each other to exist.
The other person is not my everything, nor is it the top priority in my life, and then he will have the priorities that belong to my life section.
Creating the beauty of distance is a skill, not a skill. Just like being single, you need to know, but you don't have to.
When you start living like an independent person,
You will understand the value of being single and the meaning of marriage.
You don't really need guides and tutorials,
It requires enough experience and a willingness to accept the facts.
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