Five stars for the British culture I aspire to

Vernon: Good morning. I'm Vernon. I'm Miss Brown's... uh, partner.

Gideon O'Brien: Gideon O'Brien, landlord. We were just discussing the spectacular level of neglect relating to the 29-foot north-facing garden with lawns and well-stocked borders.

Vernon: Yeah right. We're just about to get into the garden. That's a major priority. That's top of the list.

Gideon O'Brien: I'm afraid it's too late for that. I shall have to ask you to vacate by the end of the month.

Vernon: [to Bella] We're you expecting Mr. O'Brien this morning?

Bella Brown: I wasn't.

Vernon: Right.

[Back to O'Brien]

Vernon: And you made an appointment?

Gideon O'Brien: I beg your pardon?

Vernon: Section 34 of the Property Act. A landlord must give clear warning if he wants to inspect the property.

Gideon O'Brien: We'll come back later, then.

Vernon: Can't do later. That's not convenient. A convenient date must be mutually agreed. That's Section 17c.

Gideon O'Brien: Tomorrow, then.

Vernon: Tomorrow's no good.

Gideon O'Brien: Friday?

Vernon: Friday... No, can't do Friday.

Gideon O'Brien: Next Monday.

Vernon: Next Monday's no good.

Gideon O'Brien: All right, then, when?

Gideon O'Brien: One calendar month's notice. Section 17c. You'll know that.

Gideon O'Brien: There will be repercussions, Miss Brown. If this garden's not fixed, you're out on the street. You have exactly one month from today.

Bella Brown: Luna couldn't always fly, you know. Well, long ago, before the world was round, Luna and the rest of her species inhabited a... remote forest. They had... tiny little wings but were flightless. They foraged around on the forest floor and... kept themselves very much to themselves. Luna lost her parents at a very early age. They were taken from Luna... just like that. No explanation. Barely out of the nest, she was too young to know anything. She was such a worrier. Only coming out for food briefly when all the other animals had gone to sleep and the... the forest floor was bathed in moonlight. She was such a scrawny little thing. A loner. Well, life was passing by until one day Luna saw a kindly traveler holding a thing of... great wonder and beauty and... and... And that's it... for now.

Bella Brown: Mesmerized, Luna couldn't help but think about the peony. Luna asked the traveler where he got the beautiful flower. "There are many," the traveler said. "From the top of the mountain, you can see thousands... a sea of petals that will make your heart sing, for it's a beautiful sight." "But how will I get to the top of the mountain? I can't fly and I only come out at night." But the traveler had heard this before. "You seek the rarest flower from the top of the tallest mountain in the world. If you want to see them enough, you will." Luna was scared and excited, in equal measure. "I think I will find my mother and father there." The traveler smiled. "You have much to learn, child. Are you sure you want to continue on this perilous quest?"

Bella Brown: But Luna knew that whatever obstacle stood in her way, her quest could not fail. She had been greatly inspired by the words of the wonderful traveller. He would stand by her.

Bella Brown: Then, one night, alone in the forest, Luna resolved to find the magic flowers herself, even if it meant confronting terrifying demons. She had nothing left to lose.

Bella Brown: And as Luna drank in the view, she was filled with something quite magical. In the distance she could see the southern shore of the Caspian Sea, which isn't a sea at all but actually the biggest lake in the world. Luna thanked the traveler. "Oh, it's nothing. You haven't done the hard part yet." "Really?" said Luna. "Now, you must believe," said the traveler. And he pushed Luna off the mountain. Luna screamed to the traveler, "Why did you do that? I can't fly." "Says who?" he replied. And the wind lifted Luna off the mountain and she soared. "Can you see them now?" yelled the traveler. "Yes," said Luna, gliding through the air with the wind whistling between her wings. "I can see thousands of them." And for the first time in a hundred years, the traveler allowed himself a smile.