(one)
We often have disputes with friends over some trivial matters, and we do not give in to each other. There may be many reasons for not backing down. For example, because our self-esteem is at work, we all feel that it is a shameful act to compromise, but it is more likely that we all believe in what we believe in.
Every time there is an argument, I think of this movie - Joan of Arc. It is based on a true story. It tells the story of a French girl named Joan of Arc who claimed to have seen a miracle and led the French army to defeat the British army during the Hundred Years War between Britain and France. However, after the war, Joan of Arc was captured by the British army and executed at the stake. The reason for her torture was that the British army believed that what Joan of Arc saw was not the will of God, but the incarnation of the devil.
So, is what Jeanne saw a miracle? This question remains an unsolved mystery to this day. People who believe in Joan of Arc think that if Joan of Arc did not get the will of God, how could a French girl in the countryside know how to fight and how could she defeat the British army? People who don't believe in Joan of Arc think, how could God have appointed him to kill? Shouldn't God be peace loving? There are also atheists who say that Joan of Arc is actually a schizophrenic. What she claims to see is just her hallucination. As for why she was able to defeat the British army, it may be because she has no combat experience, so she planned unplanned. Playing cards, the British were caught off guard.
Of course, I'm not trying to discuss whether Joan of Arc saw a miracle, but to say: How can we be sure that what we say is true when the two sides disagree? "People only believe what they believe." In the film, the priest's sentence, I think, is the best answer.
Just like the arguments I had with my friends. Our values are different, our experiences are different, we see the world differently, and what we believe is different. And man is such a strange animal. We can be in different factions for a lot of things, and once we choose a side we fight for our side. In psychology, this phenomenon is called "confirmation bias", which means that people tend to look for evidence that supports their views, pay more attention to information that supports their views, or turn existing information in the direction that supports their views. explain.
The worst thing is that in this world, as long as you want to find out the rules of anything in this world, it is really not difficult for humans who are good at "attribution". For example, when I was young, when we looked at prime numbers, I always thought that prime numbers were odd numbers. But prime numbers are obviously not odd. At least 2 is not odd, and not all odd numbers are prime. It's just that there is a high degree of intersection between prime and odd numbers. But this intersection is not a real rule.
In fact, with enough data, we can find any pattern we want. Especially in this era of big data, not only can we get enough data, but at the same time, with the help of computers, we can discover such "rules" more quickly.
(two)
Why do we only believe what we believe? This involves a concept called cognitive dissonance.
Cognitive dissonance was first described by social psychologist Leon Festinger in 1956 in his book When Prophecy Fails. "When Prophecy Fails" describes such a story: that a "cult" somewhere announced to its followers God's will: on December 25, 1955, a flood will destroy the world, and aliens will Will drive flying saucers to rescue them and bring them to safety. As a result, at the end they prophesied, the world still exists. It stands to reason that people should see through this cult organization. However, the cult held a press conference saying that it was not that our predictions were inaccurate, but that we helped our world avoid disaster through collective prayer. Don't tell me, after this incident came out, not only did not many people drop out of the sect, but even more people joined this so-called doomsday sect.
Why did the failed prophecy not only reduce the number of people who joined the club, but instead allowed more people to join? This is cognitive dissonance! Cognitive dissonance means that when an individual faces a new situation and needs to express his own attitude, the individual will have a situation in which new cognition (new understanding) and old cognition (old belief) conflict with each other psychologically. To eliminate this uncomfortable feeling of tension caused by inconsistency, individuals tend to use two ways to adjust themselves psychologically, one is to deny new cognition; the other is to seek more information about new cognition and improve The credibility of the new cognition, so as to completely replace the old cognition, so as to obtain psychological balance. Festinger argues that when leaders' predictions fail, the failure of expectations creates cognitive dissonance among believers - "I put a great deal of effort into a belief" and "this belief is untrue" contradicts . Because previous actions were irreversible, in order to alleviate this sense of dissonance, believers had to justify their beliefs and accept new prophecies—God was moved to change his plan.
The attitude change caused by cognitive dissonance is actually a form of self-defense, after all, we cannot live in entanglement forever. Secondly, it is in our nature to maintain consistency - because the complexity of daily life places strict demands on our energy and ability, and with consistency, we can deal with it in an easier, more efficient and convenient way.
Cognitive dissonance abounds in our lives, and we all deceive ourselves time and time again so that we can make a choice and believe that we are doing the right thing. In fact, maintaining consistency has become a powerful weapon of social influence. For example, if you pay a high price for a piece of clothing, maybe this piece of clothing is not very good, but just because you pay a high price for it, the more you think this piece of clothing is good, for example, in order to increase employees' recognition of the company, some companies They will make the interview extremely difficult because the more employees put in but work hard for the assessment, the more they will feel that the job is not easy to come by and that it is a good job. For example, in business, in order to convince the other party to buy their own things, some people often do not sell products straight to the point, but want the other party to agree to a small request, because when the small request is agreed, the other party will establish such a mentality This kind of cognition "I like this person before I help him" or "I am a helpful person", when this cognition is formed, it is much easier to sell products to him, because refusal will make him originally The established cognitive dissonance, in order to avoid the discomfort caused by cognitive conflict, will naturally make it easier for him to agree to your big request. Therefore, it is often said that if you want to make the other party like you, let the other party do you a small favor first!
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