2015.4.1 Rain Marnie
~The blonde girl behind the blue window, in the crescent night, the bay after the high tide, the blond girl in white pajamas, from Barefoot rushed out of the cold wetland mansion to meet her favorite little girl. They went on a picnic together, she taught her to row, and their meeting became each other's secret, asking each other only three questions a night. Why can only meet in the evening of high tide, because she can't be too far from the mansion. But what does Anna's blue pupils echo with the girl's blonde hair? She is the most beautiful girl she has ever seen, with delicate facial features, dreamy blonde hair, a gentle voice and a playful and friendly smile. They often hug each other tightly, because they are afraid of losing and cherish each other. What is the encounter, whether it is a miss or a coincidence. Everyone's youth has a time when they hate themselves. When all imperfections are magnified, when sensitivity meets gossip, when you realize that only you are active and isolated, then you have begun to escape. At this time, it seems that one person takes the train to the distant place to become the eternal theme of growth, because everyone including yourself understands that this is the first time in life to find and choose.
Asthma is a disease of the mind, so I am pitying myself. So there is a you who is more perfect than me everywhere, Marnie. You said that Anna is your favorite girl. Among all the girls you have met, your favorite is me. I want to tell you that you used to irrigate that young life with love, so this blue-eyed girl with your blood must love you too. I don't want to ask why there is you in my life, I just want to seize the joy and warmth that makes people enchanted. When you put the little blue flower representing luck in my hair, and take me into the mansion to feel your happiness, I thought we had become one. But I'm still a little jealous when you dance with him so intimately. But you smiled brightly again, and took me to dance in the yard under the moonlight, and I was relieved that it was just the two of us. It's me being too greedy, when we are together, it's good to only belong to each other.
I met Miss Hisako because we both love you and the Wetland Mansion. I drew the outline of the mansion with a pencil, and I was so familiar with it that the lines seemed to grow on their own after seeing it once. But my mansion is black and white, because the memories of black and white when I was a child and the reality of black and white when I grew up. Hisako's mansion is so beautiful, it is shining in the sun, for you who are as bright as the sun and for your splendid memories, Miss Hisako's brush makes me appreciate the beauty of another world.
I knew that our encounter was inevitable, so when Caixiang found your diary, I was not surprised that it recorded what we experienced. I just wanted to know why Cai Xiang thought of me as Marnie, but I was shocked, as if I really became a part of Marnie. Who am I, how can you know me, and who are you, how can I know you. I told myself to go to the barn with you, I didn't go crazy, just because in a dream, you said you would wait for me there, but I'm actually scared too, I'm afraid of the dark, I'm afraid of heights, I'm afraid of the wind passing through the wall The strange sound I made when I was more afraid of this night of lightning, thunder and storms. But thinking of you, I inexplicably have the courage. I know that your life is not so happy, the mother-in-law who lives with you abuses you, and the sisters frighten you, so the role is changed to me as the "you" who firmly comforts you, just like you once smiled and hugged me in your arms. The dream was awakened by the ruthless departure of you and him. Why did you abandon me without even looking at me. The overwhelming sadness suffocated me more than the oncoming wind, I ran in the rain and cried
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