Benjamin couldn't follow the advice of his brother Duncan, refused to gain optimism from his new love, and gave up writing columns, completely caught in the whirlpool of loss, unable to extricate himself. The 13-year-old son Dylan became obsessed with dark art creation, only black and white and blood in the picture, and was eventually expelled from school for stealing. At this time, the youngest daughter Luo Xi showed the maturity of a girl beyond her 7-year-old age. She showed special maturity. She began to take care of her own life and her father's mood. Even the decision to buy a new home was her final decision. Become a new center in the family system.
Such a seemingly unexpected decision - to buy a zoo that was about to be abandoned and disbanded, as their new home, to start a new environment to continue their life, and ushered in a new opportunity for this family to rebuild the system.
When people encounter trauma, such as the impact of some loss, the death of a loved one, the breakup of a lover, or the collapse of a career, we often fall into a sinking blow. Saying goodbye to grief is not a one-off event, it is likely to go through a relatively long process, during which The pain of psychological love may not be so easy. Psychology calls this process the "five stages of grief response". In her 1969 book "On Death and Dying", Dr. Elizabeth Cooper-Roth described five stages of a person's performance in experiencing the departure of a significant other: denial, anger, compromise, depression, and acceptance.
In front of the loss of a loved one in the family, the father is full of grief, denying all the way, unwilling to start a new relationship, and at the same time sinking into the tangle of depression and depression. The son was full of anger that could not be resolved, and he was in adolescence and could not communicate well with his father, so he vented his anger into behavior that deviates from the norm. The daughter directly compromised with the realistic arrangement and played the role of an adult, but secretly hid a piece of clothing that her father wanted to throw away and that her mother often wore, and put it under her body every day before she could sleep. The family, in the pain of loss, was deeply tortured, but they could not talk about it openly or resolve it.
Fortunately, the Benjamins decided to take over this wild animal park with many animals. This strange behavior brought them a new "life", friendly contact with animals, close contact with new friends, and led by the zoo manager Kelly. The left-behind team rebuilt the zoo and ushered in the reopening of the zoo and the new life of his family in the struggle.
The end of the film is the most touching scene. Benjamin brought his children to the cafe where he met his beloved wife for the first time. Facing the chair where his wife once sat, he recounted every detail of the first act of being attracted to his wife affectionately. With tears in her eyes, Rosie said "Hi Mummy" with a smile, you know, they have finally finished this difficult love farewell and can start a new life from now on. In this scene, those who have studied psychological counseling may naturally think of a technique commonly used in the Gestalt psychology school - the empty chair technique.
From a psychological perspective, depression is metabolically costly, but it actually has social value: depression tells oneself and others that something is hopelessly bad; to make a faithful assessment; severe depression can also force a person to face harsh realities and make difficult decisions that ultimately lead to their continued survival and successful reproduction.
Life carries a lot of impermanence, including a lot of loss. Many times, we don't have the chance to choose a special zoo as a turning point like Benjamin, and we can't get the pale comfort from parents and friends "don't worry about losing", "life is full of turns". Relief, we are still in pain. Please accept this pain first, because the pain of loss is normal, please allow yourself to be hurt, because going through grief sometimes has many processes and many stages. If we still can't resolve and relieve the pain after a long time, maybe we can think about whether we can find some professional help, such as psychological counseling. It is also a kind of wisdom to be able to find external help in pain.
Why not!
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