The day before the test, I watched half of the pilgrimage road. When I came home after the test in the morning, I didn’t want to do anything. I was lying in bed and couldn’t sleep with my eyes closed. My mind was full of the moments of failure of my road test. So many failures gradually merged into an endless black hole, with an evasive way of not wanting to think about it, but still uncontrollably disappointed with myself time and time again. Sometimes girls who feel that the tears are too high have the disadvantage that they are not able to transfer their sadness into tears.
I wanted to cry very much but my eyes were dry, so I exhaled a few mouthfuls of turbid air with thoughts, got up and turned on the computer, and continued to relive the pilgrimage that I had watched half of yesterday.
Then, watching the movie, a little bit of emotion slowly emerged in my heart, and those sad turbulence seemed to be gradually cleared up because of this.
I can't say what's so good about this movie, and I don't like Martin Sheen, a stubborn little old man, but maybe they traveled on a journey, stayed in a small hotel, and met all kinds of pilgrims and the poetic northern Spain on the way. The rural scenery will also be what I will see in a month, so there are many warm expectations and longings.
Although they haven't really become pilgrims yet, they still want to kindly shout when they see peregrinos carrying mountaineering bags, trekking poles and a small shell: Buen camino! I was deeply moved by this movie, and I became more firm in my belief that I walked the whole journey alone for two years.
It seems that everyone in the movie asks fellow pilgrims the reason for taking the pilgrimage; the cute Dutchman for losing weight, the Canadian girl for her inner haze, the Irish writer for inspiration, the American little old man for his son . Going to the shores of the last mucia, everyone actually gets more than what they originally intended. Although the Dutchman still hasn't lost his beer belly, he has learned to face it with an optimistic attitude of "changing another suit". The Canadian girl didn't quit smoking, but shared her deepest haze and unruly eyes. I can also see more relief. The Irish writer encountered the best subject along the way, and also found the most mysterious inspiration. The last shot, the male protagonist in a Muslim country, I don’t know if it was with his son’s dream. It's still my own belief, I've been on the road... I
once read a sentence: I'm on the road all my life, but I just learn how to get along with myself.
As the person who knows me best, I often feel that I still haven't seen Xia Xue deep in my heart, but I know many characteristics of myself. I am a stupid girl with low IQ and stupidity, so I failed the road test seven times. What makes me proud is that inner sun and that powerful self-healing ability. Even if it is sad, it can be recovered in half the time of the movie.
The desire to take the pilgrimage was inspired by a girl who traveled to study two years ago.
At that time, a certain paragraph in a diary wrote:
If life can be so arbitrary.
On a Sunday in January, a Chinese girl came in. She was very tall and very handsome. She was probably in her early twenties. She came here because she thanked Pepe for telling her the address of the dealer last time. , let her buy tofu as she wished, because there were not many customers in the store on Sunday, so we began to chat slowly.
She is very talkative, and I know very well, so I had a good time chatting. In just over an hour, her conversation took me into a world that I had never imagined before. She was doing foreign trade in China. A good job, a good salary, and a good treatment are the envy of everyone, but she resolutely gave up everything in the country because of a small idea in her heart, and started her own study tour, with Spain as the first stop, Larry Oja is already the third city in this stop.
After listening to this, my mother's face showed an incomprehensible look, because the previous girl revealed her age, she was very young, but she was twenty-five or six years old. In my mother's heart, a woman is this Probably the best thing you should do at your age is to get married instead of wandering around the world like duckweed, but I agree with her idea very much. I think if what I want to do is really possible, I should let go. Do, dreams are meant to be pursued and realized. If dreams can only be imagined in dreams and dare not try, don’t you feel regretful when you don’t have the time and energy to realize your dreams when you pass this stage and age?
This girl carries her strong Hokkien accent, but it is ups and downs in my heart again and again. I often see the blogs of many people studying abroad on the Internet, but I always feel that those are very far away. In real life, I met such a story and person that I could see and hear. The touch she brought to me was beyond words. At that time, I was reading a book "Endrina y el secreto del peregrino", It is about the difficulties encountered by pilgrims in the Middle Ages on the pilgrimage road to Santiago. I also have a lot of longing and yearning for camino de santiago, but I really lacked too much courage from this girl. It is the most beautiful luxury and the most splendid freedom in life. She has it, she holds it, I hope that one day in the future, I can do so many things I want to do that I dare not do, Xia Xue , you have to believe that all dreams can come true, as long as you have the courage to chase them.
Then in Holy Week as an experience and try to walk in the last stop SARRIA for a week, many people may be puzzled, but I am an Aquarius girl with weird characteristics, you see, I love to laugh and it is undeniable I like to be lively, but at the same time, I also like to be alone. I like to go to the gym alone, go shopping alone, stay in my room, code words, read books, watch movies, and write movie reviews. I have to maintain my own personal space for many things. At first, Holy Week was also I wanted to go alone, but I didn't expect that there would be a lot of courageous girls who would go with me when I brought it up. But I still won't give up the idea of walking alone. I want to go along the coastline from IRun and the traditional route from France. I think I will fall in love with the feeling that my body is in hell and my mind is in heaven.
Because on the road, I can always give me more insight and experience and see more of myself.
Quiet Guagua once commented on me and HY, saying that HY will become a good woman at home and I will not, I will become a strong woman. At that time, I and HY reacted violently at the same time and felt that it was impossible. At that time, I felt that although I was not virtuous, I could calm down and retreat behind the scenes.
Thinking about it now, it is true that sometimes boys look at girls more objectively. Although that silly girl HY will definitely not settle down as a good wife and mother, she has a stable temperament in her bones, and she only treats good people. But I am different, like Brother Wolf once said that I have strength in my bones, I taught this to Pepe, and she clapped her hands when she heard it, saying: This is the evaluation! I've never been able to think of how to describe you, maybe too close so I've never been able to articulate this feeling. Perhaps the biggest reason why I want to take the pilgrimage road is because I want to discover more of that kind of power. After going through a period of confusion, I will find ways to improve after seeing through many things.
Romain Rolland has a saying: a person's character determines his fortune, if you want to keep your character, then you have no right to refuse your fortune. In the process of growing up, because of his flamboyant temperament, he actually heard a lot of gossip, both overt and dark, and was hurt and wronged by others. Sometimes I think about changing my temperament. But I am who I am. If I were as restrained and warm as Pepe, maybe I wouldn't be so controversial, and I would have less setbacks along the way, but in the end, I would only lose the one and only Xia Xue. I don’t want to change, then I have to become stronger, so that my temperament will not be hurt more under the premise of the same, I feel that I have found some signs of inner strength, and I will no longer take unnecessary criticism from others To trouble yourself with gossip, you can hide more thoughts and have your own way of healing. better control your emotions.
I still have the two biggest advantages of self-confidence and optimism, and then I also know my countless shortcomings and faults. Optimism is an innate quality that I have never lost. I have never cried and clapped since I fell. When I went back and showed my mother my blue and purple legs, I was very proud of my mother's scolding and felt that I was just different from those little girls in white stockings and princess dresses. After a car accident, he can still laugh and say: at least he can take an ambulance, who has ever been in a car in his life. Whenever something bad happens, you can always comfort yourself to be positive. Smile is never heartless, but never wants to let others be troubled by himself.
Unlike optimism, self-confidence is gradually formed the day after tomorrow. Maybe it has always been potential, but now it has been tapped more. It’s just that my self-confidence is different. It really comes from a small source in my heart, not someone else. A few words of goddess, beautiful, eloquent and enthusiastic compliments, I only recognize the qualities that I recognize, such as being strong, HY and many people have said it before, but I just don’t admit it, But only when I am aware of it can I appear such an adjective in my dictionary. I can't summarize many things that I don't realize. In fact, I am a girl who has no pedigree for myself, and I often hear it from other people. The characteristics of my heart have never been really affirmed. Because I never compare myself to others, I can't give myself a high or low score at all.
Let this article, which is supposed to be a film review, go on like this, just like my inner monologue, I know that I am wild, I know that there is a man hidden in my heart, I know that I still have a long way to go. There are still many things to experience, and I will not be content with peace. There are always various types of fruits that have their favorites. Only the durian has a strange shape and strong flavor, which many people do not understand, but those who like it will definitely be obsessed with that flavor. Brother Changliu said that I am an iceberg, which makes people afraid to get close, because of my sense of distance, and because of my discerning eyes, I am single. But I know, it's not that I choose but I haven't met the person who really knows how to appreciate durian. As Shu Ting said in To Oak Tree, because of the power in my bones, I absolutely can't be a high-flying flower that clings to the branches. I must have the posture of kapok, as the image of a tree and stand side by side with the future one. They have their own private space for each other, as if they are far apart, but depend on each other for life.
It sounds a bit funny, but it is really my inner thoughts. I hope that my daughter, Amanda, who is still far away from my life, is just like the nickname I gave her: Nuan Nuan. I want her to be a hybrid of HY and Pepe, to be the opposite of me. Because girls like them can be tolerantly liked by everyone, and can be more easily happy. There are fewer grievances and setbacks caused by temperament. It seems that as a parent, you always hope that your child will be less injured and be stable and happy.
Sanmao's experience is envied by everyone, but not everyone wants to do and can do it.
Thanks for this little setback, it gave me so many inspirations to write articles, and I am also grateful for the feeling this movie gave me. The road ahead is like a pilgrimage road, with many difficulties and bumps, but as long as I appreciate it quietly, I will be everywhere. All picturesque buen camino!
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