Steve Carrel He De He can be old and eat young grass, but still old and no sparks

[first lines]

Radio Announcer: OK, what we're getting now is - yes, they're saying it was in fact a fire that erupted inside the external tank of the ship, exactly ninety-eight seconds after it entered the asteroid field. No one is sure what caused the fire which led to the massive explosion, killing all twelve crew members and scientists aboard the space shuttle Deliverance, taking with them our last and only hope. Once again, if you're just tuning in, the CSA space shuttle Deliverance has been destroyed. The final mission to save mankind has failed. The seventy mile wide asteroid known commonly as Matilda is set to collide with Earth in exactly three weeks time, and we'll be bringing you up-to-the-minute coverage of our countdown to the 'End of Days', along with *all* your classic rock favorites. This is Q 107.2.

Dodge: [listening on the car radio] I think we missed the exit.

Penny: Hello, officer, what seems to be the problem?

Officer Wally Johnson: Well, for starters, you're driving at 15 miles over speed limit.

Penny: Really? Huh, I thought I was making better time than that.

Officer Wally Johnson: And uh, you know you got a tail light out.

Penny: No...

Officer Wally Johnson: Yeah... also, your plates... expired about a month ago.

Penny: Go on.

Officer Wally Johnson: Uh... that's it. That's everything. That's three things.

Penny: Ah, why don't you write us out any number of expensive time-sensitive tickets and we'll be on our way?

Officer Wally Johnson: May I have some identification?

Penny: Yes, of course. My name is Penny and this is Dodge.

Officer Wally Johnson: Okay. License and registration.

Penny: Well you see that's where we got a problem because I didn't get a chance to retrieve my identification before fleeing my home during a deadly riot. However, we were fortunate enough to hitch a ride with a very nice trucker who turns out, hired a hit man to assist him in a suicide thus bestowing us with this. This beautiful mode of transportation. So... the answer is no... no license or registration here. However, given the current situation with the *** whistles while pointing to the sky *** couldn't you find it in your heart to set aside the law, just this once, and let us on our way so that I can give my friend here a fighting chance of being with the one he loves before we all reach our untimely conclusion?

Officer Wally Johnson: No.