I used to be a very moral person. I remember when Li Zongsheng and Zhu Weiyin divorced for Lin Yilian's sake, when I saw that the pornographic photo booth was born, when I saw Liu Ye who said that Xie Na would not marry, when I saw that Nicholas Tse was said to be divorced because of the mistress.. .I remember for a long time, I didn't listen to Li Zongsheng's songs, I didn't watch Gillian's TV series, I didn't watch Liu Ye's movies, I didn't pay attention to Nicholas Tse's news~ At that time, a classmate asked me curiously: Is this really that serious?
I replied: of course serious! Because they are wrong!
Since I was a child, I have seen too many elders' marriages being intervened by the mistress. As I got older, I found that although none of them got divorced, there were too many tears and unwillingness hidden behind the complacency of the female elders. For this reason, I feel that the world is very unfair, why can men do whatever they want, and women have to work hard to maintain the surface peace in order to keep a complete family.
When I was very young, my world was only right and wrong, black and white, light and dark. As long as it was wrong, I didn't even want to hear it.
As time went by, I accidentally watched a Korean drama "Autumn Showers" with my friend, and it started to change. In the play, Zheng Ryeo Won and Kim So Yeon, two close friends who are like sisters, fell in love with the male protagonist at the same time. The former reluctantly gave in for the sake of sisterhood, and planned to hide his love for the male protagonist for the rest of his life. Unexpectedly, he and his wife Kim So-yeon had a car accident on their honeymoon. He was fine, but his wife became a vegetable. Later, when his wife was in a coma, the actor fell in love with Zheng Liyuan, who had been in love with him. The worst is, of course, waking up to find a wife betrayed by her beloved husband and best friend.
The ratings of this drama were not good at the time, because ordinary people are naturally angry at the betrayal of their loved ones, but aside from the moral part, I think it is not bad. It deeply depicts the inner struggle of the three people. , also made me unknowingly let go of the single point of view of right and wrong, and try to look at the "betrayal" from a different perspective.
Therefore, I am no longer indignant and angry about the "Just Go with It" I watched later and the "Something Borrowed" I saw now, but intuitively calm. To experience the right and wrong, and the deeper meaning of those so-called trivial dramas!
Of course, "betrayal" is definitely wrong, but what I want to get to the bottom of is: what is the cause of "betrayal"?
In fact, whether there is marriage or not, my personal feeling is still the same as the plot of the Korean drama I mentioned first! The intelligent and intellectual Raiqiu and the beautiful and generous Daxi are good friends who grew up together as sisters. Daxi's fiancé was introduced by Rachel six years ago, but in fact Rachel and he had a good impression of each other back then, but it's a pity that the two were too careful about their similar personalities, which resulted in the two having no relationship, and thus let nature The positive Daxi took the lead. Six years later, Rachel also became Daxi's bridesmaid of course.
However, she never expected that the love between her and him hidden in her heart would spiral out of control inadvertently.
So, the man she loves the most and the best sister have become the biggest problem in her life! ~
I often wonder about the betrayal, what exactly are they betraying?! just me?!
In fact, I think these are not just pure "betrayal" dramas of friends stealing their boyfriends, nor are they deliberately highlighted as moral stories of mistress vindication. I think they are for those who clearly love each other but miss each other, Why don't each other dare to face the exploration of their truest feelings! ~
The timidity of feelings and the constraints of friendship, the protagonist often cuts off the love thread by himself~ However, I can't forget the inner feeling~ The hysterical longing in the heart, with the accumulation of time, and out of control~
Often in this dog blood In the end, the love that has been buried in the deepest for many years, at this most critical moment, runs counter to their own ideals and morals.
So betrayal is the most slut in the eyes of others, but insist on true love! ~
But we can really feel that he betrayed not only Daxi, but himself
Many times, people are always unable to make the choices they want most. The wonderful thing is that it is you who make the decision, but the reasons always point to others. As a lawyer, what he really wanted to do was to teach, perhaps because of his father's expectations, which prevented him from becoming a teacher in the end. Rachel had a crush on him since college, but she denied her true feelings after Daxi appeared. She gave up the love she wanted most for the sake of precious friendship. Another friend with different surnames who has also silently guarded Raiqiu for many years is simply a copy of her. In order to prevent other girls from approaching, he would rather reject love on the grounds that he is gay than admit that he already belongs to his heart. (Speaking of this, I can't help but want to swear!)
The reason we cannot make the most desired choice is because we are not brave enough, we are afraid of being denied, we are afraid of being rejected, we are afraid that the once comfortable world will be shattered. Therefore, I prefer to hide in a world that I think is safe with an ostrich mentality, and even deceive myself and tell myself that people should not be too selfish in life, but consider others. However, in fact, the difficulty in facing possible failures and difficulties is the real reason for not being able to choose at will.
So, pretending to be rational on the surface, but completely split in the heart, thinking that if you give up what you want most, you can still find other happy substitutes, but you don’t know that a person who can’t be honest with yourself will pay a serious price of being unable to be happy in your life.
Because the most important thing we all forget is what the id wants.
The long-lasting beauty comes from the life you want in your heart, including happiness.
If you don't have the courage to make the choice you want most, you can only surrender happiness.
Without happiness, one can still live without hindering other possibilities in life; but without happiness, I think the most important "dream" and "love" in life seem to be nothing.
As for this ending~ The ending of the movie is too ideal, I feel that it should be like "Autumn Showers". After the two girls who are in love with sisters broke off contact, the last encounter was also completely hurt before. Just stay away forever. Maybe it's the way of thinking of foreigners or the understanding of emotions is different~
However, I still like that every person who habitually escaped from himself later, bravely faced the opposite changes: he finally summoned up the courage to refuse the marriage he didn't want; Rachel finally bravely kept the love she wanted; Rachel's opposite sex confidant Finally confessed to her. And I actually shed tears in his confession: I have always loved you, and whenever you marry someone, I love you even more; my love is not overwhelming. Whenever I fall in love with someone, I just drink rose wine silently, and then watch "Hands-on Love" by myself.
A person who is willing to be honest with you will definitely be able to open her heart, let go of the heavy shackles in her heart, and live the life she wants with the person she loves, and let the symphony of time slowly revolve around repair. With the wounds lingering because of cowardice ~
life is also like this, love is like this, dreams are like this, everything is the essence of the choice made in the heart, because of this,
when we are no longer afraid of opening our eyes in the dark, can we Seeing the faint light penetrating in the darkness, only if you stop forcing yourself and abandon yourself, you will have fewer regrets in life.
Then we will find out: ourselves! It is the key to determining whether you are happy or not in this life!
Therefore, I also understand that when I take anger on others because of my unhappiness, what I hate is that I am not brave enough. The most difficult thing for me to admit is: I face myself, but I value the repeated betrayal of myself. Passive by
nature , I often can't choose, I never take the initiative, or take the initiative to seek a relationship, maybe I never decide what I want to do, and I never face up to the life I really want. But I am obviously a very assertive person in my bones, but I often hesitate. I should move forward, but
I want to stay in the same place. Difficulties that change may bring. So, like Rachel, I wanted to maintain a superficial balance with myself. But I also gradually discovered that whenever I thought I was balanced inside and out, there was always an extremely powerful force in my body that kept rushing into my heart, and I didn’t know how to be a good me, so I could only oppose it with irritability or depression.
I want to say that only if you can face yourself directly, can you live with yourself safely for a long time; if you can live with yourself safely, the black hole in your heart will no longer be a bottomless pit; .
I can't change anyone, but at least I can change myself.
Right and wrong, there is still no doubt, but the reasons for right and wrong are even more important. This is what Xiaosan’s movie taught me. It seems to be minor, but it makes me invisible and leap over myself.
I remembered a sentence my friend said to me: "If the person I love doesn't love me anymore and tells me to get out, I will leave, no matter whether I still love her at that time or not, I don't love the reason for leaving. It should be, if I still love, I should leave, because of love, I can't let her be troubled by my love. If she thinks of me in the future, and asks me to come back, if I still love her, I will be stunned If I don't love you anymore, I will go back and say "Get out"!" Thinking about it at the beginning, I didn't fully understand this sentence and abandoned everything... But now that I think about it, they are both right to each other. , just follow your own heart to avoid regrets and future drag, their feelings are so real, there is no frosting ~
um ~ I want to say: from now on, even if others betray me, I will no longer betray myself .
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