"I'm not good at all, Ada, I never forget you , I never thought it would be like this, I'm useless, everything is a mess. Are you really letting go, or are you taking revenge on me? You're smiling...is this true? I never thought it would be this way. We just After the breakup, I felt as light as a bird. You thought you did a good thing for you, and for myself. Until a tiny little thing completely disrupted my life. That day, a tiny hair from you Clip, made a laugh at me. It was that morning that I realized I lost you, and so many other things. You are no more, and I will never live with anyone again. Life goes on right My ridicule, I always see a face similar to yours, smell a similar smell, hear a similar voice, or just how I feel, I don't know...you know? That hairpin you dropped one day, You didn't know where it was after that, it's still in my pocket. (I'm fine, really fine. Your shop is now a real estate agent. I was passing there one day and I happened to be going there ) No, Ada, it's a lie, I used to go down that street to look around and imagine everything was the way it used to be. I just stood there, imagining you sitting in it, creating your 'little Hero', I lied to myself and tried to console myself, Ada..."
"I went to see her right after breaking up with you, the house where you were born, the town where you were a child, my dear, your mother took me on a trip back to your past , I made her swear never to tell you, and she kept her promise. I saw the room you grew up in, the bed you slept in, darling, I pictured your childhood. You were there, Didn't know I'd meet me one day. I imagined you lying on my lap and I told you a story and you grew up, a story in my heart. Do you know how much I love this story? I love it Wrote a happy ending. I sat with you in that room, didn't speak, you sat quietly beside me. That was the ending, it was another life, it was only you and me, you looked at me, eyes Blue but not frantic, we are silent. Another happy ending in another life, that is the one that should be ours, our story is there somewhere, and it will always be with me because that It's my only support. I'm a little surprised that the taste of such a person will always remain the same. I took something that belonged to you, a record, "Fairy Tale" by Arda Karde, if you go back one day, you Never know why that record is gone and Muzeyyen won't tell you, we won't satisfy you. I still have your record, but you won't know. When I close my eyes, It's you, not someone else, lying in my arms, but you won't know."
"It is undeniable that walking without borders is always exciting, it is a kind of escape, whether it is history, oppression, law, or annoying. Obligation, absolute freedom, the road always extends westward."
"We are always greedy for what we want, and we can't satisfy our desires. We live in the mundane world, and it's bizarre. Without me, I hope you won't be lonely. If you need more than you need, you will become insatiable. When you ask for more than you need, you need more space to store it. Society is a hotbed of madness. Without me, I hope you will not be lonely. Exist, I hope you will not be lonely."
"Nature's forces do not favor human beings"
How lonely does a person really need to stop in front of happiness, only then will he completely give up the happiness at hand, continue to turn around and go on alone, thinking that the original loneliness is the safest, but only by chance, will I be surprised that loneliness has been transformed. , turned into a black hole of pain, devouring all its power.
How lonely does a person have to be to break away from the life that everyone envies, give up his identity and a glamorous life, put on a backpack, change his name and surname, walk around the world, not linger for anyone or anything, talk to the air, write In the diary that no one reads, I finally wrote in the diary "It turns out that sharing is the only way to be happy", and then looked at the blue sky and left the world with a smile.
He wanted that toy very much, and he was fascinated by it. At that moment, he felt that as long as he got that toy, he would become the happiest person in the world, so he flattered and cried and tried his best. After a few days, he began to think that if the toy was lost or broken one day, he would be unhappy again, he began to worry and even fear, and then he thought, as long as he throws or smashes the toy first, then it will not be safe. lost or broken. So he threw the toy into the river, so he smashed the toy with a hammer, he smiled at the sky, this happiness will not leave him voluntarily. A few days later, he found himself even more unhappy. He missed the toy that was thrown into the river or had been smashed so much that he often walked alone to the river, expecting a miracle. There are no miracles. So he had to continue to be lonely.
So he had to continue to be lonely, and pretend that it was his choice and have no regrets.
He has a lot of toys, a house full of toys, he often hides in the doll house, listening to his parents arguing outside the house, he gradually doesn't care how much they fight, he often looks at the house full of toys, a Not even interested in him. Finally one day he made up his mind. He didn't bring any toys, he left the house, he left the dollhouse, he thought he would be happier without the dollhouse. He walked for a long time and met many people who had their own toys along the way. He did not envy him. He felt that his real toys were waiting for him somewhere. All I thought about was the dollhouse that I had escaped from, and I was shocked to realize that what I had been looking for was by my side.
Alber's mother is right, the bigger the city, the easier it is to get lost, but people don't realize or choose to ignore the loneliness in their hearts. Maybe they still cherish the saying "Lonely is shameful", but they don't know how pitiful it is to pretend not to be lonely compared to shame.
People in this era seem to be used to pretending to be strong. In their eyes, it seems that vulnerability, sensitivity, sadness, loneliness, and loneliness are the key words of a sad life. They are afraid of being seen through and sympathized with. No matter where they go, as long as they are in the crowd, they always wear that pair of clothes. A mask, a mask with empty eyes, an indifferent smile, and a stiff smile. They thought they were safe by hiding behind that mask. Sometimes they can meet the person who can let them take off their masks and let go of their inner defenses, but they choose to leave because of habitual cowardice. Fear of change, fear of being seen through, this is the heart disease of many people in this era.
Alexander said before his death: It turns out that sharing will make you happy. At the moment before death, it seems that he is suddenly relieved of everything, and he is no longer demanding of others. All he thinks of in his mind are those warm moments. Is it a waste of time. However, his state on the road is enviable. Everything comes and goes with fate, and he doesn't deliberately, not persistently, or tangled. That renunciation is so unattainable. How much pain and sorrow stem from desire and stubbornness. Wanting too much, reluctant to let go, unwilling to leave, reluctant to face, too much reluctance and dissatisfaction lock our hearts and our happiness.
People like Alexander seem to be lonely by nature, and he is so far away from the closest person. However, if his family had not allowed him to see too many scenes that a child should not see and face, maybe he As parents expect, they will graduate from a prestigious school, find an enviable good job, marry a woman with similar abilities and interests, start a family, raise two children, and spend the rest of their lives. When Xian goes, the children may be busy, they may be all around, or they may leave quietly in the warm sunshine in the afternoon with a book. Yet another or more possibilities of a past that has passed, will never be known.
When we were still a blank piece of paper, we couldn't choose what to write or draw on, whether it was a meticulous and rigorous life, colorful graffiti, or even obscure abstract lines, we couldn't decide, every blank piece of paper Under the arrangement of fate and the influence of the surrounding, content was passively added. Some people say that some people are born with unhappy genes in their bodies. If this is the case, can there be a machine that tests the proportion of happiness in genes and tells us when we are born that your life is doomed? Lonely, destined to be unhappy.
People are exhausted under the direction of the road sign called interest. How many people are willing to stop, take a look at the roadside scenery, listen to the voices around them, and how many people are willing to believe in another person 100%? , they will even hurt their loved ones for the sake of money, and they can't even believe what they have seen and heard. How many people really dare to ask themselves: Are you happy? Is this the life you want? On the day you die, do you dare to say no regrets to yourself?
There are many high-rise buildings and shining rainbows. These lonely cities are dressed in gorgeous coats. People also use those gorgeousness to cover up their real selves and build copper walls and iron walls in their hearts. In this city called loneliness, there are more and more residents, people are less and less happy, and they are less and less afraid to face their true self.
Alper's last wandering at the entrance of the cinema was also expressing the uncertainty in his heart. Whether to hold on or let go can make each other happy. On the surface, it is great to give each other freedom, but in essence, it is still selfish and unconfident. A person, how much he loves himself and how much he loves the people around him, can have enough courage to move out of this lonely city.
Alexander, maybe he didn't expect him to die in this way at such a time, however, since he burned his papers and gave himself a new name in that dilapidated restroom, his life has become a real one. Meaningful expeditions, not knowing where to wake up tomorrow, what to eat the day after tomorrow, everything, completely unpredictable. So, in fact, it can be said that his death is also in line with his choice.
So, are you happy? Or are you lonely?
It feels familiar to you, have you been or are you a resident of that city?
So, do you want to move out? Or would you rather live like this forever?
So, lonely people, welcome to Lonely City.
"No, no one's waiting for me, I'm lying."
"I know, darling, no one, no one ever. You're always just borrowing, someone else's child, someone else's life, someone else's body, until you pay it back. The day you go back, and you will always be alone."
"Only sharing can bring true happiness" - Alexander Supertramp
"If I smile and fall into your arms, can you see, what I see now..."
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