The Daily News telemarketer:
[the Daily News telemarketer, over the phone, accidentally mispronouncing his name]
Hi Mr. Davis, it's Ron from The Daily News, how you doing this morning?
Seth Davis:
[correcting him]
It's Davis and I'm not interested
The Daily News telemarketer:
ok I'm sorry to have bothered you, have a nice day
Seth Davis:
wait a minute, that's your pitch? You consider that a sales call?
The Daily News telemarketer:
well, umm
Seth Davis:
you know I get a call from you every Saturday and it's always the same half ass attempt, if you guys want to "close" me you should "sell" me.
The Daily News telemarketer:
alright
Seth Davis:
alright, start again.
The Daily News telemarketer:
ok, it's Ron The Daily News, how you doing this morning?
Seth Davis:
[amused]
shitty, what'd you want?
The Daily News telemarketer:
it's not what "I" want, it's what "you" want
Seth Davis:
alright, now we're talking, what are you selling me?
The Daily News telemarketer:
we're offering you a subscription to The Daily News at a substantially reduced price, we're trying to reach out to people who've never had home delivery before
Seth Davis:
so, your basically everybody that already have a subscription is getting fucked on this one?
The Daily News telemarketer:
yeah, I guess so
Seth Davis:
ok I can handle that, ok tell me, why should I buy your paper? Why shouldn't I get The Times? or The Voice?
The Daily News telemarketer:
Well, The Village Voice is free, if you want it, you should certainly pick it up, but The Daily News offers you something no other paper can: a real taste of New York, we have the best features, more photographs than any other papers in New York and we have the most reliable delivery in the city, now what'd you think?
Seth Davis:
you know what I think? I think that was a sales call, good job buddy
The Daily News telemarketer:
so, are you going to buy a subscription?
Seth Davis:
[before immediately hanging up]
No I already get The Times.