Will you support your children when they have their own firm dreams?
What if that dream is so out of reach, and you need to gamble on your studies? Will you still support it?
When seeing the first question, all parents will definitely say "Of course support" without hesitation, but when that dream needs to give up their studies and make a desperate attempt, most parents may start to back down or even start to obstruct.
Because of a distant dream, it is too illusory, not to mention giving up school.
During the Dragon Boat Festival holiday, I took Xiaoxun to watch a very educational movie - "The Birth of a Legend", which tells the story of the football king Bailey growing from a shoe shine boy in a slum to a generation of football kings.
If Pele's parents had been against Pele playing football, and had blocked it, we might have lost this great man in football.
The film is about Bailey's growth history. Talking about the growth of any one person cannot be explained separately from his original family, so the whole movie is more about Bailey's family, Bailey's parents.
Bailey was born in a poor and backward town, and his family lived a poor life. His mother was a cleaner and his father was a former football player, but he had to retreat from the green field after a leg injury without receiving any compensation. After his father retired, he could only engage in manual labor.
Bailey's real name is not actually Bailey. His real name is Edson Arantes do Nacimento. The name Bailey was originally a humiliating nickname given to him by a wealthy boy.
Below, I will single out the part about family education in the "Birth of a Legend" movie for discussion, because for our parents, this is also a movie that is very worthy of parental reflection.
1. When a child is mocked
For children, verbal violence hurts as much as physical violence.
When Bailey and his mother went to clean up at the host's house, they heard the host's kids talking about the team, and Pelé interjected: "I like Pele." The rich boys were stunned for a moment, then laughed at him and said: That's Billy, not Bailey, you like Bailey so much, then you can call it Bailey.
He got such a humiliating nickname because of his substandard pronunciation.
When Bailey and a few buddies teamed up for a football match, they were called "barefoot squads" by others because they were so poor that they didn't even have shoes.
In order not to be laughed at by others, they quietly stole the peanuts from the truck. When they were selling peanuts at the market, they were seen by the rich boy, and their words were very provocative and humiliating.
So, Bailey's little friends fought with those rich boys.
After returning home, my mother asked Bailey where the injury came from. Bailey said that the teacher beat him. Mom angrily went to school to find a teacher, but Dad, who had guessed the truth, said, "I'll go to the teacher tomorrow."
Later, Dad told Bailey : I fought when I was your age, especially when the older kids called me nicknames. But then I grew up and realized that fighting is about insecurity, and if you want to be a professional player, you can't be ashamed to admit yourself.
This sentence has benefited Bailey for life. Later, Dad sewed the name "Pele" on the jersey made of his sheets, and Dad told him: This is the name everyone cheers for you in the audience.
2. When a child commits a major incident
When Bailey's "Barefoot Squad" was mocked by others, they stole peanuts to sell in exchange for some old, big, ugly leather shoes. However, the newly replaced leather shoes not only did not help them, but made them timid during the game, and also caused the loss of a small partner's life.
The "Barefoot Squad" were cheering after winning the game when they were recognized by a truck driver carrying peanuts. So the driver took a few people and started chasing the "thief", Bailey and a few friends desperately escaped.
The sudden heavy rain made the road wet and slippery. One of the little friends fell. Bailey quickly pulled his friend and hid in a small hole next to the dirt pit. However, the pit collapsed, and the soil and water quickly sealed the hole.
By the time Bailey crawled out desperately to pull out his friend, it was too late, and Bailey lost this friend forever.
When such a life-threatening event happened, I can't imagine how scared and self-blaming Bailey, as a child, was at the time. I changed my position and imagined that if this happened to me, I would probably have been beaten and scolded by my family, at least the words must be blamed and scolded.
But what moved me was that when he came home crying, his mother hugged Bailey and said to him gently: Stop crying, Dicko.
At such times, a hug from a parent can be very powerful for a child.
3. When the child is confused and wants to give up the dream of love
Since the unfortunate death of Bailey's good friend, Bailey has never played football again. Maybe he subconsciously thinks that if he insists on winning the game, his friend will steal things and change his shoes, and will kill his friend.
But Dad knows so much about his son. When Dad saw Bailey's eyes blank and listless every day, he picked a mango on the side of the road and told Bailey: You know what? I also had a mango tree like that at home when I was a child, and then I created my own fruit training method.
Then Dad put on a good football show in front of Pele, but Pele just sat there. Dad insists on taking his son to the mango tree every day, kicking a "ball" to show his son, and even making mistakes on purpose, pretending that he can't score a goal.
Finally, once again, when Dad didn't kick the "ball" into the bucket again, Bailey got up and kicked, kicking the mango ball into it. Dad laughed, and Pele laughed, and Dad knew that Pele was only happy when he was playing football.
Since then, my father and Bailey have practiced kicking "ball" under the mango tree every day. My mother, who was originally against Bailey's playing football, saw this scene accidentally. Seeing the love of the father and son for football, the mother quietly dialed a few times. The phone number left by a scout the year before.
Bailey is going to the professional team for training.
The part of Bailey playing football with his father was very touching. The light of father's love was particularly dazzling at that moment, and his father also looked very handsome.
Later, when I checked the information, I found an interesting thing. Bailey when he was young and the actor who played Bailey's father in the movie looked alike, and both had the same bright eyes.
4. When the child is frustrated
When Bailey first arrived at the training team, he lost his confidence because he was not used to European-style training, and was criticized by the coach several times. Because in the 1950 World Cup, the Brazilian team lost the game, and that day was even called "National Humiliation Day".
So everyone blamed the reason for the failure on the traditional Brazilian "Jenjia" kicking method, saying that "Jenjia" is pretentious and flashy, and they should learn new European training methods.
But Bailey grew up playing "Ren Jia" since he was a child, and suddenly he had to change his routine, and he couldn't get used to it at all. Bailey, who could have broken out of the siege with "devil's footsteps" and scored goals on the court, turned into a "poor student" who couldn't even kick the ball on the training ground.
During a training session, Pele accidentally injured his knee and almost missed the World Cup because he used the "Renga" kick.
The collapsed Bailey began to regret why he did not continue his studies. He could have found a job to help ease the burden of the family. When Bailey called home, mum said to him: " This decision was made together and it was the right one, no matter what happens, my dad and I will always love you.
There was no complaint or blame at all, let alone: Whoever asked you not to listen to me in the first place had to play football.
Bailey's success has talent and hard work, but the love given by his family must be his determination and motivation to keep going.
5. When the child succeeds
When Pele won the World Cup for Brazil that year, the whole room began to shout excitedly. Pele's father sat in front of the TV and smiled with tears in his eyes. His smile was full of pride. Looking back, I happened to see my mother, who was also full of tears, and the couple smiled at each other across the crowd.
This picture is really touching. Of course, the acting skills of the actors also add a lot to these frames.
Bailey was only 17 years old that year. He became famous in the first battle. In the following decades, he has existed in football like a legend and has become a myth in the history of world football.
I am a person who is not interested in sports at all, not even a fake fan, but after watching the movie, I am actually interested in football, because Bailey's "hat trick" is really wonderful.
Once the boy from the slum, with the encouragement of his parents, recognized and accepted himself, and finally became the pride of the country and his family.
"The Birth of a Legend" is a movie suitable for parents and children to watch together. It tells parents how to love their children, understand them, help them, and how to be their children's harbor and strength ; The courage to accept yourself, admit yourself, and be a better yourself.
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