I love you. In a totally heterosexual way. [clerks II]

Layla 2021-11-20 08:01:27

-So that's the way you see all this time we've spent together? That's weird, man.
I thought you were the only guy in the world who got me and had my back, the only person who'd take a bullet for me ,'cause I assumed you felt about me the same way I feel about you.
Then, all of a sudden, one day, you're like, "I'm moving. Bye." Do you know what that's been like for me ?
I'm looking at a future that just sucks, because you're not gonna be in it anymore.
And you're not even throwing me over for a life that means something to you. It's just a stupid, hollow existence you think you should embrace because you're getting old or something, because it's the kind of life everyone else goes after.
You're a fucking drone,dude.

You think I want to start making friends at my age? Christ.Who would want me as their friend?
I hate everyone, and everything seems stupid to me.But you were always the counterbalance to that, the guy who was the yin to my yang.
But now what the fuck am I gonna do for the rest of my life?
I mean, shit, I really wish you would've told me this when I first met you that one day,you were gonna bail on our friendship, because if I had known you were just gonna flake on me a few decades later, I wouldn't have even bothered with your ass in the first place.
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Oh, then, man, you must love this guy,'cause he's the biggest pussy I've ever met.
The dude who lives his life according to everyone else's standards.
"I got to go to Florida and get married,'cause that's what's expected of me." And the insane part is, he ain't even that crazy about the chick he's marrying or Florida, never mind the fact that he's got a perfectly good chick right here in Jersey who he's nuts about, and even Anne Frank could see she's nuts about him.
God knows why.
And she likes you for who you are, man.
She ain't trying to stuff you into a box you' ll never fit into.
Not to mention the fact that she's carrying your hideous CHUD of a kid.
Geez, if you had any sense whatsoever, you'd stop trying to bray it up with the rest of the sheep and live your life the way it makes sense for you, you ass!
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… You're my best friend,and I love you.
In a totally heterosexual way.
Please man, don't leave me.

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Extended Reading

Clerks II quotes

  • Randal Graves: Ease up, Pillow Pants. The dude's not into your D&D GoBots bullshit.

  • Becky: Emma, I don't - I don't know what to say.

    Emma: [on the verge of tears] Take him, fucking whore.

    [throws her ring at Becky]