Claude and Maria are a loving French couple. They have four very beautiful daughters and they dote on them very much. As for their future life partners, as parents, their hope is to be French, preferably a devout Catholic.
However, their eldest daughter was married to an Arab, the second to a Jew, and the third to a Chinese. Therefore, Claude and Maria have three sons-in-laws with different races, different skin colors, different beliefs, different lifestyles, and different minefields and taboos. This made Claude and Maria feel angry, but they had no choice but to accept it. In addition, they still have hope for their son-in-law who has the same belief and the same ethnic culture. So they put this sustenance on the fourth youngest daughter.
The younger daughter had already been proposed by her boyfriend, who was an African-American black man. So you can see in the film that the family gathering with all the members is like a small UN meeting, and the picture is very happy.
When the youngest daughter brought her black boyfriend to see Claude and Maria, they were devastated, and their son-in-law dream was completely shattered, to the point where there was nothing left of scum. So, Claude and Maria decided to divorce, Claude decided to sell the house and travel around the world, and Maria went to the priest to talk to the priest and complained why God did not care for her wishes.
Finding a son-in-law with the same belief and same ethnic culture is the wish of Claude and Maria, but this is not the wish of the youngest daughter. The wish of the youngest daughter is to find someone who loves her and who has the courage to eat with her for the rest of her life. In the end, the little daughter's wish came true, which should have been something to celebrate, but because they did not accept the result, the whole family was filled with rejection, rejection and collapse.
If you put aside from your own experience to see that this African-American black person is not a good type, in addition to the legitimate reason for the happiness of the youngest daughter, so he has to block it, it is just that he simply does not satisfy his own preferences and his wishes cannot be realized, so it is strange. Instead, use negative emotions to express your own refusal, or, in other words, to force others to change in a way that hurts yourself or hurts others. Is this behavior normal? But whether it's appropriate or not, it's undeniable that this kind of behavior is not uncommon in all kinds of relationships.
But today we don't talk about communication, we talk about "control".
Why would anyone want you to do something the way they do? For example, the boss at work, TA's way is not the most convenient, not the most profitable, not the icing on the cake for the company's reputation, but TA requires you to do it according to TA's way. The Bible says that those who are below should submit to those who are above, even to the point of submitting to those who are perverse (see 1 Peter 2:18). Therefore, even if what the boss says is rubbish and has nothing to do with biblical principles, we must obey. But what is behind the strong demand for obedience as the obedient party?
I thought, maybe, maybe this is just the last thing TA can control?
In fact, everyone who wants to control others, they think they are the control, but the truth is, they are the real victims, the real control is themselves. They are controlled by the emotions of the controller, they are controlled by the consequences of breaking out of their own plans, they are controlled by the control of others.
In my opinion, control is, to a certain extent, killing one's free will. So, an executor who obliterates a person's free will, will TA have free will? Most likely not, otherwise TA will not strongly demand the obedience of others. At least, in the matter of controlling others, TA has no free will at all, and TA has to do it.
Recently, I was chatting with a friend about something, TA thinks what should be done, how to do it, this thing will be successful. And for myself, I like TA's advice, because from the perspective of the world, TA's advice is very pertinent and visionary. But in prayer, God's leading on this matter is not like this, so when we talked about this matter again, I expressed my reluctance, but I didn't say my reason, and TA's response was , at your own pace and at your own pace.
I love this kind of friendship, and I enjoy it. I think everyone is a different individual, special, unique, cannot be copied, cannot be imitated, and such autonomy, which is different from the free will of other people's ideas, can be respected. Very warm.
Thank the Lord, love is not control. If you say you love someone, but you want to control them, then you still love yourself; if you say you love someone, but you allow them to control you, then you still love yourself.
The film "Father-in-law and mother-in-law are really hard to be" (2014 French version)
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