Rex:
I used to sleep on a lamb's wool beanbag next to an electric space heater. That's my territory, I'm an *indoor* dog.
King:
I starred in twenty-two consecutive Doggy Chow commercials. Look at me now, I couldn't land an audition.
Boss:
I was the lead mascot for an undefeated high school baseball team.
[sneezes]
Boss:
I lost all my spirit, I'm depressing.
Duke:
I only ask for what I've always had, a balanced diet, regular grooming, and a general physical once a year.
Rex:
I think I might give up.
Duke:
What, right now?
Rex:
Right now.
[turns around]
Rex:
There's no future on Trash Island.
Duke:
[sneezes, then turns to Boss and King]
You heard the rumor, right? About Buster?
[All the four dogs murmur]
Boss:
Who's Buster?
Duke:
Uh, my brother from another litter.
King:
What happened to him?
Duke:
Suicide. Hanged himself by his own leash.
Boss:
Aw, boy...
Rex:
I want my master.
Chief:
[scoffs in disgust]
You make me sick.
[vomits off to the side and walks up to the four dogs]
Chief:
I've seen cats with more balls than you dogs.
[shouts at Duke]
Chief:
STOP LICKING YOUR WOUNDS!
[Duke looks around awkwardly with his tongue out. Chief walks up to Boss]
Chief:
You hungry? Kill something and eat it.
[walks up to Duke]
Chief:
You sick? Take a long nap.
[walks up to King]
Chief:
You cold? Dig a hole in the ground, crawl into it, and bury yourself.
[walks up to Rex]
Chief:
But nobody's giving up around here, and don't you forget it, ever. You're Rex. You're King. You're Duke! You're Boss! I'm Chief. We're a pack of scary indestructible alpha dogs. You're talking like a bunch of housebroken... pets.
Rex:
You don't understand. Uh, how could you, I mean you're a...
Chief:
Go ahead say it. I'm a stray, yeah.
