The so-called "greasy" is not limited to the out-of-shape body, casual dress, and vulgar language. Its essence, to some extent, reflects the hardship, difficulty and anxiety of middle-aged men and women. Standing at thirty, but not confused at forty, there are old people on the top and young ones on the bottom. They bear various titles such as "house slaves, car slaves, child slaves, card slaves, elderly slaves", and shoulder all kinds of expectations and expectations. At this stage, a passage from Haiqing in the classic realistic TV series "Dwelling", which was popular 10 years ago, described this predicament well: "...Every night, I sit at the window Before, looking at the lights outside the window, I would think how wonderful this city is. There are as many people as there are so many kinds of lives. I don't know the lives of others, but what about me? Every day when I open my eyes, there are a series of numbers. Out of my mind, the mortgage is 6,000, the cost of food and clothing is 2,500, Ran Ran goes to kindergarten, 1500, 600 for personal exchanges, 580 for transportation, 300 to 400 for property management, 250 for mobile phone, and gas. The utility bill is two hundred, which means that from the first breath I wake up, I have to pay at least four hundred every day.”
These urban living costs, which can be accurate to single digits, make people dare not relax, and naturally they cannot think about the longer future. In the face of these many economic obligations, life pressures and psychological burdens, many men and women have no intentions, no conditions, and no perseverance to focus on creating their own external image. Especially in an era when we are in such a high-speed operation, you may be left behind at any time. In this era, no matter what industry you are in, it is difficult to achieve financial freedom by working, but the high development of material civilization also helps. It pushes the continuous expansion of individual material desires, forcing it to constantly pursue ideals that may not belong to itself. When the rich ideal and the cruel reality frequently collide violently, the weak-willed can easily lead to a dead end. On the morning of December 10 last year, the ZTE jumping off the building, which was frequently reprinted by many financial public accounts, is a typical case. Programmer Ou Mouxin jumped from the top of the ZTE building, and his beautiful life at the age of 42 came to an abrupt end. It stopped, but what was left was a broken family, four lonely old people and a pair of young children.
It is different from the weak who cannot let go of the established life trajectory change. Yes, the brave are more willing to carry all the pain and pressure on their shoulders, and dare to face their own unexciting and boring life calmly.
Some time ago, there was a post on Zhihu, "Why do some people sit alone in their cars in a daze after driving home?" with more than 2 million views, and one of the men's answers received more than 10,000 likes: "Many times I don't want to get out of the car either, because that's a dividing point. When you push the door, you're the firewood, rice, oil, salt, father, son, and husband, but not yourself; Smoke, this body belongs to me." This answer is similar to Eileen Chang's half-century ago in "Half Life", "Men after middle age often feel lonely, because when he opens his eyes, he is surrounded by people who depend on him. , but there is no one he can rely on" is also very consistent. Although Eileen Chang's love experience and life experience are not very rich, her understanding of human nature and the psychology of men and women makes people have to admire her delicate observation and perception.
This kind of situation is really deduced in this play. When his wife questioned that he had built a man's den in the basement, Nicolas Cage said angrily: "Because I am busy six days a week to death, paying for the house is like damn The obstacle course, trying to rush out the front door, I'd say, one day, I'm going to trip over because of George's toy, get slapped on a dog's shit, get sent to the ER, I mean maybe we need to have boundaries, I mean maybe we have to, have the adult section and the damn kids section, do you think i want to build the damn family house, you're right darling, i hate billiards and not a big fan of machine parts sales, try Fulfilling sales quota and being a big man is not at all my youthful dream, bright future, everything in the world is looking forward to, I mean, I'm going to grab the balls of the world and squeeze hard, my tired Asshole, sagging ass, fat, bald, cheesy ass, swim ring belly, hairy ears, hairy nose, my salary went from $145,000 to $45,000.”
This is exactly a middle-aged man's powerless accusation of a fucking life. As he grows older, his bloated body image changes, there is not much hope to see, the pressure is huge and there is nowhere to relieve it. He was extremely angry at the mess that the children made at home, but in order to maintain the image of a loving father, he had to let the anger dissipate at the moment of madness and murderousness, because he knew that although children were really annoyed and wanted to strangle them sometimes, but still. in the person you love most in the world.
It seems that it is not easy for a person to be middle-aged, whether it is a man or a woman, especially women now, who not only earn money to support their families, but also take care of their children. Many times, for the sake of the growth of children, I gradually give up the dreams of my youth. As Selma Blair said in the play, "It's not as a woman that you don't have dreams, career dreams, relationship dreams, I have it all, but there are more important things, you've been waiting for it all your life. , this anxiety, this secret excitement, the horror, because you know that one day, inevitably, you will create this life, it's huge, it's important, everything builds up in that moment, and then it comes true, no matter what you No matter what you wished, it is not what it is now, no matter what, it is him, no matter who you were, we are just mom and dad now."
The so-called quiet time is just the habit of wealthy and leisurely middle-class families and above. Middle-aged men and women from ordinary backgrounds have long lost the word easy in their daily life, and naturally it is difficult to get rid of greasy. For most of the middle class and below, all they can do is to continue to work hard to support the elderly and raise children because of these responsibilities, responsibilities and obligations, and strive to let the next generation live a life of getting rid of the greasy appellation as soon as possible. rich and refined life.
PS: Suitable for parents whose children have read elementary school or above
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