After taking a look at Alex's seven treatment subsections, it can be said that Paul's work is impeccable. Although it was difficult at first, they gradually started to make progress. The turning point was when Alex seized the pain in Paul's private life and attacked him brutally. Paul couldn't bear it anymore, grabbed Alex, cornered him, and threw a cup of coffee in his face. Healing leads into a dead end and then dies and then comes back to life - Alex comes back the next week and the two have a chance to discuss Alex's inner hatred of him and hope that Paul hates him the way he wants and drives him away. And Paul also changed the idealized image that he had always maintained in front of Alex because of the constant challenge and temptation of the other party. When Alex tried to analyze Paul with the sailboat, Paul admitted that he was an emotional loser. This gesture of showing weakness is very important to Alex, who is constantly expected to be more perfect and stronger, and he can finally reveal his inner fragility little by little.
An important evidence of progress in therapy is that I, as a viewer, along with Paul, slowly began to like Alex, deeply moved by him, and saddened by his pain. A very important transformation in psychotherapy is that the counselor can withstand the negative emotions aroused by various provocations and temptations to the client, and slowly find the part of the client that is liked and sympathetic, establish a connection from here, and use it as a job. The basics. Only when we really like a person will we be willing to help him and put ourselves in the other person's shoes to consider what is best for him.
However, this road is very hard for Alex. Let him face his own heart, where there is so much pain, fear, self-hatred. Once he gave up the fragility and helplessness in his heart that he learned from childhood to overcome the whole world, his world began to be precarious, dangerous and hopeless. He said to Paul, "I feel like I can't do it, I can't do this treatment, and get where I want to be." Paul asked, "Where do you want to get there?" Alex said, "To stop me hating myself so much."
So when he got a call from the military and invited him back, he naturally grabbed the straw. The path is much easier and more familiar than self-exploration fraught with unknown risks. For a person who adapts well in his own way on a realistic level, no, it should be said to be very successful, it is indeed difficult to embrace unknown changes. For Alex asking Paul to give a positive assessment of the military, Paul is very embarrassed, both in terms of professional ethics and in terms of feelings with the case. But Paul really had no choice. Refusal would only lead to the rupture of the healing alliance and the collapse of trust, which would not help Alex in any way. In the case of ineffective persuasion, Paul can only hope that the next time Alex encounters difficulties in his life again, he will have enough motivation to continue the treatment. The result - a tragedy, for which Alex gave his 39-year-old life and never had the chance to truly see his worth and live the life he wanted to live.
To be fair, it can't be said that Alex's unfortunate end was the result of psychotherapy. After the accidental bombing of a civilian school in Baghdad, Alex's belief in being a strong man instilled by his father and the more human part of his heart have begun to conflict, and the conflict outside of consciousness is more destructive, so he constantly punishes himself , and cannot continue flying. But in any case, such an outcome is very uncomfortable for the therapist.
Here, not only as a counselor, but as a patient who has undergone two years of personal analysis, I would say: Psychotherapy is dangerous. We choose to isolate a part of ourselves because that part is too painful. Once we start on the path of self-discovery, it's hard to go back; of course, long-term therapy is valuable: in the end we know ourselves better, and we live freer, stronger, and more resilient. Change is even more profound and powerful than you might think. But it's a long, hard journey, and before you decide to go, I hope you ask yourself, "Am I really willing to endure the pain and hardship to go through this?"
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