Old, dead - what do you do in the face of fear

Corine 2022-03-29 08:01:02

The doctor told him that he had an irregular heartbeat, and he suddenly realized that he was old.
He refused to go to the hospital to be checked on his aging body by cold instruments. He
rejected the doctor and told him that he could no longer waste like a young man.

For him, who has obtained wealth, family, and honor by himself, his destiny must not be determined by the doctor's words, and even the laws of nature cannot control him, and he must control his destiny in his own hands.

So, he started sleeping with young women, he found youthful feeling in them, and he never got out of it.
As the most credible car dealer, he suddenly thought one day: I have spent half my life in exchange for the title of "the most creditworthy car dealer". I only have half my life left, maybe soon. It's not necessarily dead, why do you have to work so hard to maintain such an external name? Why not have fun doing what you love?

Well, how can there be such a "madman" in the world, his wife and son are separated, and his reputation is ruined.

The only people who still help him are an old childhood friend and a married wife.

His childhood friend was short, fat, and destitute. He only had a restaurant left by his father to operate, but he married and had children and lived a happy life as a normal person.
He is content with aging. He has seen countless beauties twilight, and he understands that this is irreversible, and there is no point in fighting against it. It is better to hug the old wife and live lightly in An An.

When he looked at his old friend and thought about his wife, he also repented: it turns out that old age is not so scary, at least she is with her, and she is happy anyway.

In the end, whether fear can overcome repentance is not a question of how the protagonist will choose, but how you will choose in front of the screen.

Don't think that you will definitely choose to "go back". You haven't faced that fear yet.

Watching "My Invisible Symbol" a few days ago, the heroine's father suddenly found himself old while running, suddenly became "afraid of death", began to be depressed, nervous, and began to believe in all kinds of strange methods to help Save time for yourself.
The fear was so sudden and unpredictable.

How does depression come about?
If you often think, I’m 27, I’m going to my third year, I can only work for 30 years, I don’t have a house, no car, no wife, I don’t have enough salary to pay the rent, I will be old soon, 30 years is not enough for me With so many things, I will definitely achieve nothing, and my life will be over... As time passes by, this kind of thought pops up from time to time, and that's how depression comes.

Old age and death are the themes of life. It won't come too late just because you feel good about yourself. It will come suddenly. Do you dare to say that you are ready?

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Extended Reading
  • Ulises 2022-04-02 09:01:16

    I was once, honey, it doesn't last

  • Maria 2022-04-01 09:01:19

    The betrayal of the old gangsters is so lonely, there is nothing that can't cause dust and can't hurt (☍﹏⁰)

Solitary Man quotes

  • [last lines]

    Nancy Kalmen: When was the first time that a doctor sent you for a heart scan? Hospital called you. Called your daughter.

    Ben Kalmen: Uh, Dr. Steinberg ordered up that test about six and a half years ago.

    Nancy Kalmen: And how long after that did you start cheating?

    Ben Kalmen: That day.

    Nancy Kalmen: And you never went back to have the test done, did you?

    Ben Kalmen: No. Cant use that as an excuse though. It was a factor. But, uh, you know, things were building up.

    Nancy Kalmen: Building up?

    Ben Kalmen: Yeah. I was becoming invisible.

    Nancy Kalmen: [confused] Invisible?

    Ben Kalmen: Look, thirty years ago I would walk into a room, that room would change just because I was there. It was, you know, I was a graduate, self-made man, great shape. I had the TV commercials, all that stuff. I remember. I was right next to the camera when you shot them. You know what it was like back then, I was a lion. That's how people looked at me. But then, you know, things started to change. And over the, uh, past ten or twelve years, I'd walk into a room and only old people noticed me, they knew who I am. And to everybody else Im invisible.

    Nancy Kalmen: You were never invisible to me.

    Ben Kalmen: Well, that doesnt count because you were my wife.

    Nancy Kalmen: Oh? Well. You know what, Benny? If you're lucky, that's what happens. You get old.

    Ben Kalmen: No, I accept it's biological. I just don't accept that it happened to me. So, when, uh, Steinberg said he thought he saw something on the EKG, I got nervous. And when he called up the heart scan, uh, to see if there was any blockage. I had every intention of walking out of his office and going right there to check on it. But instead? Instead I went into a bar and grill on Lexington Avenue had a couple of pops to calm down and, uh, I picked up the first young girl who said yes and took her back to a suite at the Carlyle.

    Nancy Kalmen: And what did that do for you?

    Ben Kalmen: The truth...? It did plenty. See, I figured you'd see it on my face, you'd know straight off. But you didnt. You didn't say anything, you know. So, I kept right on going. And then, uh, you know, awhile after that Im up in my shop at white plains looking at the books. And I say to myself, why should I be New York's honest car dealer? Then again, nobody said anything. Nothing for years. But you know, I, I still don't understand why you... you didn't go back and have the test just to make sure. I'm gonna go to a doctor and give him that kind of power? The, the when, the where and the how? There's no, theres no way. You know what its like when we get our age. The best thing a doctor can say is, uh, well, "Oh, the survival rate is high"... or, uh, "it''s a good cancer", or... uh, hey, you know, no problem. "We got it early." I dont wanna hear any of that. And I wasn't gonna go get some of those, uh... those, those beta blockers and all that crap that slow you down and level you out. I was gonna live my life the way I wanted to until the fucking thing in my heart exploded.

    Nancy Kalmen: But you cant cheat death, Benny. Nobody can, no matter how many 19-year-olds you talk into your bed.

    Ben Kalmen: I know that. I know that now.

    Nancy Kalmen: Well... my car's parked over there. And I'd be happy to drive you back to New York City... if you're ready. Take a few minutes and you decide what you really want.

  • Susan Porter: You're gonna be okay.

    Ben Kalmen: You came to see me?

    Susan Porter: Yeah.

    Ben Kalmen: You're gold, Suse. You're... pure gold.