Lifelong search, the result is a field of disappointment. When you endure, accept, realize, and overcome, you finally break through the shackles of life and come to the other end of the blade, and find that there is nothing in front of you, and an irreversible life behind you. It turns out that it's never courage that makes you stare into the abyss, it's just curiosity based on self-destructive impulses. This despair transcends religion and philosophy and begins only when a child discovers that "my parents never loved me". So the real despair, never complicated, so grounded, comes from the curse of the parents.
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