2 "Death," Murray said suddenly, "is a sad thing, Mitch. It's just as sad to be unfortunately alive."
3 We're teaching something wrong. You need to be very strong to say, if the culture doesn't work, don't accept it. Build your own culture. But most people can't.
4 "Life is a continual advance and retreat. You want to do one thing, but you are destined to do another. You get hurt, but you know you don't deserve to be hurt. Take it for granted, even though you know you shouldn't.
"Love wins. Love always wins. "
5 Why should we spend a lot of time on unnecessary chores? They do not know Simpson, they have not known this and other people related to the case. However, they are willing to do this wasted time, all day, all week Indulge in the farce of others.
6 Morrie, as he puts it, built his own culture — long before he got sick. Group discussions, walks with friends, going to church in Washington Square Dancing and entertaining himself. He also developed a program called the Green Room to provide psychotherapy to the poor. He read books to find new ideas for his classes, he visited colleagues, kept in touch with graduates, Writes letters to friends far away. He prefers to spend his time enjoying the pleasures of eating and enjoying nature, never on TV comedies or weekend movies. He has established a pattern of human activity - interacting, influencing and caring for each other - This pattern enriched his life.
7 "Many people lead meaningless lives. Even when they are busy with something they think is important, they seem lethargic. This is because they are after the wrong thing. For you to make life meaningful, you have to dedicate yourself to love, to the community around you, to create a value that gives you purpose and meaning. "
First Tuesday World
8" The most important thing in life is to learn how to give and receive love. "
Second Tuesday Self Pity
9 "Mitch, I don't allow myself to have more self-pity. Just a little tear every morning and it's over." Just a few minutes of sadness, and then start the day.
10 Sometimes you can't just believe what you see, you have to believe what you feel. If you want someone to trust you, you should first feel that you can trust him -- even if you're in the dark, even if you're falling backwards. "
Third Tuesday Regrets
11," Our culture discourages you from thinking about this type of question, so you only think about it before you die. We focus on some pretty selfish things: career, family, earning money, paying off the mortgage, buying a new car, fixing the heater - getting caught up in the never-ending chores just to stay alive. So we're not used to taking a step back and looking at our own lives and asking, is that all? Is this all I need? Is there something missing? "
12 Now Stan is going to be deaf. Coppell imagines what it would be like to have them together one day, one unable to speak and one without hearing?
"We would hold each other's hands," Murray said. "There's a lot of love going on between us, Ted, and we've had thirty-five years of friendship. You don't need words or hearing to feel this relationship. "
Fourth Tuesday Death
13 Realize you're going to die and always be prepared. It's more helpful. You value life more while you're alive."
Fifth Tuesday on Family
14 "That's the family part Meaning, not just love, but also telling others that someone is watching over you. This is what I wanted most when my mother died - I call it 'psychological safety' - knowing that there is a home that is watching over you. Only. Family Can give you that feeling. Money can't do it. Fame can't do it, and work can't do it."
15 If you want to experience taking responsibility for another person and learn how to love with all your heart, then you should have children.
Sixth Tuesday - Talking about relationships
16 But being detached doesn't mean not being engaged in life. Instead, you should be fully invested in it. Then you can get out. "
17 When you learn how to die, you also learn how to live. "
Seventh Tuesday - Talking about the fear of aging
18 I have a sense of shame because our culture tells us that if you can't scrub your ass yourself, you should be ashamed. But then I thought, forget about what culture does to us Indoctrination. I have ignored this culture for most of my life. I have no need to be ashamed. What does it matter?
19 Human touch. At seventy-eight he gives like an adult and receives like a child.
20 If You stay at the age of twenty-two and you will always be as shallow as twenty-two. You know, aging isn't decay. It's maturity. Being close to death isn't necessarily a bad thing, when you realize that After the fact, it also has a very positive side, and you'll live better because of it."
If you've been reluctant to grow old, you'll never be happy, because you're going to grow old eventually.
21 "Actually, I belong to different age groups. I'm a three-year-old and a five-year-old; I'm a middle-aged thirty-seven and a fifty-year-old. These ages I've been through all stages, and I know what they're like. When I should be a child, I'm happy to be a kid, and I'm happy to be a smart old man when I should be a smart old man. I'm happy to accept natural gifts All power over me. I belong to any age, until now, do you understand?"
22 "I don't envy your stage of life--because I've been there too."
Eighth Tuesday-- Talking About Money
23 "Wherever I live, I meet someone who is possessive of new things, new cars, new possessions, new toys. And then smugly show it off to you : 'Guess what I got? Guess what I got?'
" You know how I explained this? These people yearn for love, but can't get it, so they accept these substitutes. They are open to material things, expecting an emotional reward like a hug, but that doesn't work. You cannot substitute material things for love, kindness, tenderness, or affection between friends.
24 "The society is confused about what it wants and what it needs," Murray said. "You need food, and you want a chocolate sundae. You have to be honest with yourself. You don't need the latest sports car, you don't need the biggest house.
"Actually, they don't satisfy you . Do you know what really satisfies you? "
What is it?
" Give others what you should give. "
25" Remember what I said about finding a meaningful life? I used to write it down; but now I can recite it: dedicate yourself to love, dedicate yourself to community, dedicate yourself to creation that gives you purpose and meaning.
"Look," he said with a grin, "there's no mention of salary."
26 "Mitch, if you want to show off to the upper echelons of society, don't do that, they still look down on you, if you want to show off to the lower echelons of society. Show off yourselves, and please give up the idea, they will only be jealous of you. Status and status often make you feel at a loss. Only an open heart can make you face the whole society at ease."
27 Every night, when I fall asleep When I died, the next morning,
when I woke up, I was resurrected.
--Mahatma Gandhi --Ninth
Tuesday --Talking about the Eternity of Love
28 If people only met Mori for the first time every day -- instead of a casual grunt from a waitress, driver, or boss, then Life must be so much better.
29 "Part of the problem, Mitch, is that they live in such a hurry," Murray said. "They did not find the significance of life, so busy looking for. They think the new car, new house, new job, but after they found that the same things are empty, so they bustle up again."
The first Ten Tuesdays - Talking about Marriage
30 "Still," he said, "there are rules in love and marriage: if you don't respect each other, your relationship will be in trouble; if you don't know how to compromise, your relationship will be in trouble; if you If you don't communicate openly and honestly with each other, you're going to have trouble in your relationship; if you don't share values, you're going to have trouble. You have to have the same values.
" And the most important of those values, Mitch. "
What?
" Your belief in the importance of marriage. "
Eleventh Tuesday--Talking about our culture
31" People only turn bad when they are threatened," he told me that day, "and that threat comes precisely from our civilized society, from our economic system. Even someone who has a job is threatened because he fears losing it. When you are threatened, you think only of your own interests, and you see money as God. It's part of our culture. "
32 "Women desperately want to be thin, men desperately want to be rich, the same is true. This is what our culture wants you to believe. Don't believe it. "You should build your own little
culture33" No matter where you live, the greatest weakness of human beings is lack of vision. We cannot see our future. In fact, we should see our potential and allow ourselves to adapt to various developments and changes as much as possible. But if you are surrounded by people who are greedy for profit, then the end result is that a small number of people get rich, and the task of the army is to prevent the poor from rebelling and robbing them of their wealth. "
34 "At the beginning of life, when we were babies, we needed others to live, right? At the end of your life, when you're like me now, you need someone else to live too, don't you? "
He lowered his voice." But there is another secret: in the middle of life, we also need others to live. "
35 "Be compassionate," Murray said in a weak voice." Be responsible. As long as we learn these two points, the world will be a much better place.
" Twelfth Tuesday - Talking About Forgiveness
36 "Forgive yourself before you die , then forgive others."
Tuesday the thirteenth - Talking about a perfect day
37 Death is as natural as life. It's part of our lives. "
38 "This is what we are all looking for: face death in peace. If we know that we can face death in this way, then we can cope with the most difficult things. "
What's the hardest?
" Make peace with life. "
39 "As long as we love each other and treasure it in our hearts, we will not truly perish even if we die. The love you created is still there. All memories remain. You are still alive - in the heart of everyone you have touched and caressed. "
40" Death ends life, but not emotional connection. "
41 "You had good times with your brother, but you don't have that feeling anymore. You want to get it back. You never want it to end. But that's part of life. end, start over, end, start over. "
Tuesday the Fourteenth - Farewell
42 None of us can erase the traces of what we have lived, nor can we live it again. However, if Professor Morrie Schwartz has taught me anything, it is : There is no word "too late" in life. He was still changing himself until the day he said goodbye
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