The male protagonist has been good at mathematics since he was a child, and he showed good thinking and paranoid spirit at a very young age. His mother told him not to stare at the sun for a long time, it would burn his eyes, but the male protagonist wanted to see if that would happen. So I kept staring at the sun, and even if the sun was too hot to open my eyes, I still forced myself to open my eyes and eventually got sunburned. A young genius, he showed a talent for mathematics, but this talent was accompanied by his paranoia toward himself, long-term thinking and no rest, which made his headaches break out frequently. Whenever this time, he would resort to self-abuse to relieve himself. Headache. When he finally found the pattern of pi, what awaited him was violent snatch by all kinds of people, and finally he self-destructed his left brain area that controls mathematical thinking. He is no longer a genius, with loneliness, but also peace... The professor told him that studying this mathematical model would make people fall into a crash, he didn't believe it, and eventually the professor's statement came true.
All geniuses have a paranoia that ordinary people can't understand. It is this paranoia that promotes their genius, and because they are geniuses, this paranoia is more obvious. The heroine in "Black Swan" and the heroine in "Autism" are the same.
I don't like to explore the meaning of life more and more, because I believe more and more that life is meaningless. There are many people, too many people, who are struggling to find the meaning of life. How many people are satisfied when their life ends! I don't know which male protagonist is better before the genius or after the genius. The genius who makes you passionately devoted to yourself also substitutes you into destruction. In the end, when you are mediocre, there is less enthusiasm and more calmness. Perhaps the greatest meaning of life is to experience, to experience all kinds of joys and hardships in life, to experience all kinds of setbacks and triumphs, and then to see through life, and feel old and say: life is nothing more than that.
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