love with its lyrics:
Look at me
You may think you see
Who I really am
But you'll never know me
Every day
It's as if I play a part
Now I see
If I wear a mask
I can fool the world
Mulan has high hopes from her family and has to restrain her generous and forthright nature. It's hard to get dressed up, but in the end you screw things up. Looking at herself in the water, she reluctantly said a word: I was not meat to play this part. I
thought that I could keep my mind and move on after finding a job in a bank. As everyone knows, recently it has become more and more confused. I started to have a voice in my heart: is this what i truly want? Whenever I turn off the lights and lie in bed, this question pops up and asks me.
Looking around, some people get their dream positions through their own efforts, while others have been unswervingly walking on the road of "doing what I love the most". I envy them so much. I envy them for having their own dreams, and I don't even know what my dreams are.
At the end of the film, Mulan did it. She brought honor to the family through her own efforts, but what moved me to tears was the words of Mulan's father: the greatest honour for the family is having you for a daughter. As the most authentic self, Mulan got the Everyone's approval.
Perhaps, deepest in my heart, my greatest desire is to be recognized by others. Growing up, I was always reluctant to be left behind. Whenever I encounter something, I never think about anything and do it recklessly. Maybe I don't have to do this at all, I'm just too competitive. Fighting and fighting, I gradually lost, I gradually lost sight of myself. What exactly do I want?
Is it about taking a job in a bank and earning a lot of money with your own efforts?
Is it to swipe Weibo every day to look at other people's "happiness", then make a painful comparison, and then decide to make it difficult for yourself to force yourself to get these "happiness" too?
After finishing work every day, living in a dormitory with nothing to do, no goals, and no object to talk to, living alone in depression?
I finally understand now that the most terrifying thing is a person who doesn't know what they want. Time has passed, and his face has aged, but he is helpless, wasting time, thinking wildly all day. am i sick? am i doomed?
i was told not to think too much and just live my life. But i couldn't stop myself from thinking about it. Because I can't stop myself from comparing myself to others. I read a lot of books, they tell me that happiness is my choice, happiness is my own business. But I really don't know what happiness is right now. For me now, only by looking at the "happiness" of others, I seem to know what happiness is.
So I lived a very miserable and unhappy life. On the one hand, I really want to have my own ideas; on the other hand, I am easily influenced by others. I hate myself like this. I think what I say is not my own, but someone else's.
I know that one day I will understand everything. I'm dead headed. Other people's advice didn't work for me. I also don't have to lie to myself and tell myself to "go my own way." I believe that life, even though it is really tough at times, will give me the most real feelings, and I look forward to that day.
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