"Alien Battlefield": A hilarious battle on a boring sandball

Isai 2022-03-21 09:01:19

During the American Civil War, a brave and adventurous gold digger was accidentally sent to Mars. Not only did he have super-high jumping skills on Mars, he met various alien races and beautiful and wise Martian princesses, but he was also involved in a conspiracy and a power struggle, and became their savior and was admired by everyone. At the critical moment of resolving disputes, it was sent back to Earth in an instant. For the sake of the princess and ethnic group friends far away, he came up with a trick to defraud the transmission key to attract the enemy, so that he could return to his "hometown" to complete the great rescue mission.

The film was adapted from "Mars Princess" by Edgar Rice Burroughs, the famous American author of "Tarzan". to direct. Although the film can be called an apocalypse of science fiction themes, it has not reached the grand and huge political height of "Star Wars", nor has it reached the beautiful scenery of "Avatar". The only things worth seeing are a group of four-handed humanoids and two huge eyeless apes in the arena. Other than that, the masculine male protagonist and the princess of Mars who looks like Ciri are barely worth seeing.

If Disney wants this film to become another money-making tool after "Pirates of the Caribbean", the remaining two John Carter trilogy not only need to plug the huge loss of the first film, but also pay careful attention to investment. and innovative ideas. "Avatar" has caught up with a period of 3D chasing the tide that can be encountered and cannot be sought. If this film still uses the creativity of the 1930s to show off, it will not satisfy the extravagant curiosity of young people in the new century. Even if the mainland can contribute a lot to Hollywood's box office for the time being, the production team shouldn't take it lightly. At least, in terms of plot, one side has developed into a high-tech warship that is energy-saving and environmentally friendly, while the other side is a western knight running in the desert, so what do they use to balance the huge technological gap between them to fight for power? Not to mention mysterious people who can travel through time and space at will, why do they have to fight hard on Mars in the dust of the desert? Is it possible to win a sand ball and leave it to dig a hole when you are bored? ! Forget it, this is a sci-fi film, I don't want to be serious with the masters 100 years ago. I don't want to think, I just like to chew on popcorn to be instilled in children's shoes. In fact, this film will not disappoint you too much.

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Extended Reading

John Carter quotes

  • John Carter: Fifty millions miles apart, and no way to bridge the gap, no way to return my body and my soul to their true home. Like a fool I'd thrown away my medallion. Then I recalled Matai Shang, his knowledge of earth, of my history. It mean Therns were a presence on this world, the cave in Arizona was proof. There might be other such proofs, other Thern way stations hidden all around the world. I knew now what the cave of gold must be used for. So for ten bitter years I searched, on the trail of rumor and legend, I fared it out every possible evidence of Therns, but I found no medallion. And then it came to me. And once it came, there were many plans I had to make in secret. I could trust no one else. I had long suspected that the Therns were following my movements. Now you'll understand the cause of my sudden death. The reason for my bizarre funeral instructions. Why the door can only be opened from the inside. For if my body dies on earth, then my copy dies on Mars. You are the key, this is the task I entrust to you along with all my fortune. Protect my body, the Therns will attempt to destroy it. In the time it has taken you to read these pages, they may have already done so.

  • Edgar Rice Burroughs: I am the key. I am the key! I, Edgar.

    [he looks for clues on the mausoleum door]

    Edgar Rice Burroughs: Ed! E... D!

    [he presses the letters E-D in 'Inter Mundos' engraved on the mausoleum door, but nothing happens, frustrated Burroughs takes out the telegraph Carter had sent him and reads]

    Edgar Rice Burroughs: 'Dear, Ned'. He never called me Edgar. He called me Ned!

    [he presses the letters N-E-D in the 'Inter Mundos' engraved on the mausoleum door and the door opens, Ned is shocked to discover his uncle's body is missing, Matai Shang appears behind him, about to kill him, but Carter appears and shoots him]

    John Carter: Hello, Ned.