I’m still procrastinating on the comments of the serious Blade Runner 2049. I saw a funny one today: Silver Wing 2049 is very popular on 4chan. There was a recent post that compiled the most popular Hollywood script for this movie. I will probably translate it.
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——Joe, hey Joe!
——Joi? ! But I saw you already...
——When Luv smashed my transmitter, I uploaded myself to her cyber boots, and then when she walked back to Wallace, I hacked into the main system. Listen, Joe, this is worse than we thought. Wallace intends to destroy Los Angeles with his army of super clones, you must stop him!
——If he has an army, how can I organize him?
——I tell you a good news. I found some help for you.
——A dazzling flying sports car parked gracefully next to him, the Owing door opened, and Sapper Morton sat in the driver's seat.
—Sapper Morton? I thought I killed you.
—I deliberately, kid. boarding. We have to save the city.
——Do you mind if I play some classical music?
——Don't mind at all.
——AC/DC Back in Black sounded loudly, the flying car approached Tyrell’s pyramid, the blue energy pillars were converging, and Wallace planned to destroy the city.
——Sapper and Joe parked outside the pyramid. Luv and Wallace appeared at the front entrance.
—"We are here to stop you, Wallace."
-"You can't stop evolution. Human beings are in the past. This is the future."
——A group of silver Terminator skeletons walked past Wallace.
——"Look at them. Powerful, soulless, obedient, perfect copy of human beings. When humans disappear, I will rule them like God."
—Sapper sneered. "There is only one God, and... well you do look like Jesus Christ. But you are still a bastard." So he began to beat one of the super clones, the battle began, and Wallace and Luv returned to the pyramid.
——They beat this bunch of robots, Sapper and Joe entered a perfect tiled hall. They saw Wallace go up in the elevator, but Luv was still there
——Joe said: "Stop him from starting that weapon, and I will deal with this bitch."
——Sapper rushed up the stairs, Joe and Luv started an epic parkour kung fu fight, second only to the subway fighting in "The Matrix 1".
——At the same time, Wallace's angry colleague tapped on two keyboards to activate his death light, and the blue beam of light filled the sky.
——Sapper knocked open the door. Wallace said, "You're late, it's already started."
-Switch back to the lobby. Luv was quite awesome and beat Joe on the ground. She lifted one foot, ready to crush his head, grinning and said: "Don't send a man to do a woman's work."
——Suddenly Joi became materialized in front of her. A quick subjective camera angle showed "hard light mode activated", Joi knocked her over and said, "You are right, sister."
——Back to the attic, Sapper said: "It's never too late" and then grabbed Wallace and threw him directly into the laser transmitter. The laser evaporated him, and then Sapper stopped the laser.
——Joe and Joi looked at the fireworks and kissed passionately.
-Black screen
——Two weeks later
——Joe went to the hospital to see Chief Joshi, and she wrapped a bandage on her head
——She told him that because of his actions, the copyist had obtained full equal rights, and asked him now that he is free and what he intends to do.
——He replied: "What I am good at: Blade Runner."
——Subtitle scrolling
——Easter eggs
——Luv is sitting in a cell in the new clone prison, because now violent cloners will be taken to prison instead of being retired. She pulled out one of her fingernails, which was very carefully groomed, and inside was a lock picking needle. The camera moved to her face, she began to smile, quietly and evilly said: "I am the best"
--Finish
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The following is the original English text
>Joe? Hey, Joe! >Joi?! But I saw you... >I uploaded myself into Luv's Cyberboot when she made contact with my emitter, then when she walked back to Wallace Corp I hacked into the mainframe. Listen, Joe , it's worse than we thought. Wallace is going to destroy Los Angeles with his army of super replicants, you have to stop him! >If he's got an army, how am I supposed to take him on by myself? >That's the good news . I got you some backup >*a BITCHEN SPORTS HOVERCAR gracefully lands next to him, the gull wing door opens revealing Batista is in the driver seat* >Sapper Morton? I thought I killed you. >That's what I wanted you to think kid , now hop in. We got a city to save. >Mind if I put on some classical music? >Not at all.>*Back in Black starts blaring as the hovercar approaches the Tyrell pyramid, where a blue energy beam is coalescing as Wallace prepares to obliterate the city* >Sapper and Joe land outside the pyramid. Luv and Niander Wallace appear at the front door >"We 're here to stop you, Wallace." >"You can't stop evolution. Humanity is the past. This is the future." >an army of silver Terminator skeletons marches out past Wallace >"Look at them. Powerful, soulless , obedient, the perfect Replicant. When the humans are gone, I will rule them as a god." >Batista chuckles. "There's only one God, and... Well, actually you do look like Jesus. But you're still an asshole" and punches out one of the Super Replicants as a brawl begins and Wallace and Luv retreat into the pyramid>after fighting their way through the mass of robots, Sapper and Joe reach an immaculate porcelain lobby. They see an elevator door close as Wallace ascends, but Luv remains behind. >Joe says "Stop him from activating the weapon, I've got this bitch." >Sapper rushes for the stairs as Joe and Luv engage in an EPIC PARKOUR KUNG FU BATTLE the likes of which has not been seen since the subway fight in The Matrix (1999) >at the same time, Wallace is furiously typing on two keyboards at once, activating his death laser, as a pulsing blue beam fills the sky >Sapper bursts through the door. Wallace says "You're too late. It's already begun." >cut back to the lobby. in spite of his skill, Luv gains the upper hand and subdues him. As she raises her boot to crush his skull she smirks and says "Never send a man to do a woman's job." >suddenly Joi materializes in front of her. A quick POV shot shows "hard light mode activated" and Joi knocks her out with a right hook, then says "You got that right, sister ." >back in the penthouse, Sapper says "It's never too late," seizes Wallace and BATISTA BOMBS HIM DIRECTLY INTO THE LASER EMITTER, vaporizing him and halting the beam >Joe and Joi look up at the fireworks then passionately kiss >cut to blackseizes Wallace and BATISTA BOMBS HIM DIRECTLY INTO THE LASER EMITTER, vaporizing him and halting the beam >Joe and Joi look up at the fireworks then passionately kiss >cut to blackseizes Wallace and BATISTA BOMBS HIM DIRECTLY INTO THE LASER EMITTER, vaporizing him and halting the beam >Joe and Joi look up at the fireworks then passionately kiss >cut to black
>two weeks later >Joe visits Lt. Joshi in the hospital, where she has a bandage around her head >She tells him that because of his actions, replicants have been granted full and equal rights, and asks him what he's going to do now that he's free >he replies "What I do best. Blade run." >roll credits
>post-credits scene >Luv is sitting in a cell at the new Replicant Jail since violent replicants are now imprisoned rather than retired. She pulls back one of her carefully embossed fingernails, revealing a lockpick concealed under it. The camera zooms into her face as she begins to smile, then quietly and ominously says "I'm the best one."
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How to Hong Kong, according to this script to make another version, the global sales of $1 billion is not a dream
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