(The good thing is in front, now I can finally start to complain )
PJ, Fran and Philippa, you guys think that because Xiaotuo doesn’t want to see that I am not going to sell the copyright, I can’t make a movie of the Lord of the Rings. Now, in the last one, I just want to break the can and break as much as you want. Is it correct? ! ! ! ! Do you know how bad this movie is? ! ! ! This is even more fanfiction than fanfiction. Did you make it? ! ! ! ! Those loyal fans of the Tolkien Society of Bull Swords in the United Kingdom are so heartbroken that they don’t plan to see what you made? ! ! ! ! As a book fan and a fan of the dual personality of the original poster, how split and two sides are not made by you? ! ! ! !
1. Brother Si Mao died of tuberculosis again! ! Will you squirt Bud and his son to death? And whose bad idea is to put Dragon Slaying in the third part? ! ! ! ! ! Did you know that in the first fifteen minutes of a movie, the audience is warming up and the audience is not in the state! ! ! ! You killed Brother Si Mao so happily that it was disrespectful to the Dragon Si Mao! ! ! At any rate, the second title Hua Dan, how could he die so out of time! ! ! ! ! If the second part ends with slaying the dragon, then the complete story line is over. ! ! ! Why do you want to make up a big golden statue yourself! ! ! ! ! ! If you know you, Mr. Tuo, you have turned all the artisan dwarves into industrialists, then you really have to turn over in the Oxford Cemetery! ! ! ! ! ! ! !
2. The town of Long Lake is really a sample to prove that Middle-earth has ethnic diversity! ! Following the inexplicable appearance of two black men in the previous movie, there is another close-up of an Asian girl! ! ! Is Tolkien really a racist? ? ! ! ! Isn’t Middle-earth really all white people? ! ! ! ! Changhu Town is a pioneer of social progress. The population is diverse and there are the buds of democratic elections! ! ! And the costumes of Bud's daughters! ! ! ! ! What to wear during the war! ! ! ! ! The original poster has been shopping these days, looking for the same style in the big skirt jacket of his eldest daughter Sigrid, what would I say nonsense? ! ! !
3. Bai Dao will attack Dol Gordo! ! ! ! Lady Queen, is it good for you to be so ambiguous with Tofu? ! ! ! ! ! Didn't you hear that your husband Celeborn is already roaring Tell me where is Gandalf for I *much* desire to speak with him in the Lord of the Rings? ! ! ! ! You just hugged the princess and went all the way on the ground. What are you doing? ! ! ! ! ! Don't worry if you are lying on the ground, what are you doing on your son-in-law's lap? ! ! ! ! Speaking of King Elrond! ! ! ! The son-in-law and mother-in-law have a strong leg! ! ! Say it! ! ! Is your wife Celebrian going crazy because she broke something she shouldn’t see? ! ! ! ! What Orcs captive tortured physically and mentally is just an excuse you used to deceive the twins Eledan Eroher and the three poor children of Arwen? ! ! ! !
4. How wonderful the Middle-earth species are! ! ! King with elk, Dain, wild boar, and mountain cross-country antelopes that pop up temporarily on the battlefield for playground friends to ride and play! ! ! ! ! The string in the Honest trailer is carried by horses, carried by trees, carried by eagles, carried by other hobbits and carried by elk!!! carried by boar!!! carried by antelope!!!!
5. Speaking of deer I can't help but talk about King Thrandil! ! ! ! ! ! ! !
I! ! Depend on! ! ! ! Really powerless to complain! ! ! ! King I is high, cold, rich and willful! ! Obviously he is a party king who loves peace, loves jewelry, loves wine, loves his son Xiaoyezi! ! ! ! ! Inexplicably, under the arrangement of the director, his wife died with a perverse temperament and wanted to fight! ! ! ! ! ! From Fahai, you don’t understand love -> "Because it was real" -> The heartache of losing his wife in Korean dramas, the sadness of autistic Baba -> Son's lack of affection, adolescence and rebellion -> Affectionately help the broken-hearted son to find friends on a blind date to achieve a universe level CP A /L! ! ! ! Say it! ! ! ! King, did you find Aragon after you drafted all the beautiful men of the right age in Middle-earth? ! ! ! And the king, when you were listening to the tofu in the tent, you gave Bud that little wintry eye, ah no, it was the big white eye that turned up, it's really ecstasy that the bones are crisp! ! ! ! Are you sure this is a hobbit, not a mean girl? ! !
6. Legolas! ! ! ! I have been a fan of Legolas since I was 12! ! ! ! Even my friends said one by one that Orlando has a big face and wrinkles in the Hobbit series. I never dislike him! ! ! ! ! But even then I can't bear this plot line! ! ! ! PJ, you added the role of Legolas to the movie, it's like Dapuben! ! ! ! ! But what kind of trouble did you arrange so many messy scenes for him! ! ! ! After the Lord of the Rings series of shooting seven arrows, turning over the horse shield, skateboarding up the stairs and shooting the mammoth, did you let Lailai run wild on the road to becoming a gymnast? ! ! ! ! Hang on the feet of a big eagle and fly over thousands of waters and mountains! ! ! Do you think you are playing a gamepad? ! ! I flew to the destination and shot the mount directly through the head. Thank you for taking care of the journey to hell all the way. ! ! ! Then why did Bolg smile with relief before he died? ! ! ! ! Is it possible to die in the hands of the one you love and finally achieve Consummation? ! ! ! Have you returned to the ecstatic battle of Long Lake at the end of the last movie? ! ! ! Then fell willingly, didn't you? ! ! Have you no regrets or regrets even if you fell to your death and got hit by a big rock? ! ! ! Do you have a fight against the Erque Mountain Monster who attacked Dale before hitting the wall with the boulder overhead and fell to the sky and hiccups? ! ! !
After that, Legolas stepped on the falling gravel and ran up the mountain step by step! ! ! ! Legolas wears invisible wings to teach you to appreciate the Broadway classic Wicked! ! ! It's time to try defying gravityyyyyyyyy I think I'll try defying gravityyyyyyyyyyyyy! ! ! So it doesn't matter if you join the Fellowship Team and your sisters and friends! ! ! I just think that the low-level sport of climbing trees in the Black Forest can no longer satisfy you, right? ! ! ! Did you hear the call of the mammoth you shot to death? ! ! ! !
Speaking of sisters and friends! ! ! "Tauriel can't go back and I won't go back!!!" "You have to kill me if you want to kill her!!!" "I'll go with you!!!" The moment you see you in the blurred background behind you Is Daddy Li Peipei's lonely and desperate face like a heart attack? ! ! ! ! ! You are the second affectionate male in Korean dramas (Although I haven't watched Korean dramas, I haven't seen them run yet)! ! ! ! How could Legolas become the second male Korean drama! ! ! ! Have you forgotten that Lord Forest Deer’s Lord of the Rings is the same as the first law of humanity? ! ! ! ! ! "Only people in the world are allowed to love Lailai, and Lailai is not allowed to love anyone"! ! ! ! ! ! Although Fifty Shades of Grey brought the overbearing president of Jinjiang starting point in love with me into Hollywood, this trend has moved to the world and entered the capitalist Obasan’s brain, but PJ are you sure you also want to follow the trend to the same level as Jinjiang starting point? ! ! ! You want to show me this? ? I might as well go back to see Marie Su and peanuts chasing Legolas! ! ! ! ! !
Tauriel is not dead yet? ! ! ! ! ! ! Kili actually jumped on Bolg to save her and died? ! ! ! Fili and Kili both died to protect the uncle, okay? ! ! ! ! ! Is it really good for movie original characters to destroy the relationship structure of the original characters so much? ! ! ! ! ! Is such OOC really good? ! ! ! ! ! Is it true that the relationship between the uncle's family is ruined like this? ! ! ! ! !
7. Speaking of uncle! ! ! ! What is the final battle? ! ! ! Uncle, are you and Azog playing on the ice seesaw? ! ! ! ! Pick up your meteor hammer and throw it on you! ! ! ! Azog held the meteor hammer with a blank face! ! ! ! Really made up for the brain:
"You go! Go! Take your things and give them to labor and management!!! If you have the ability, don't come back again!!!"
"You...you actually drove me away?!!! You actually drove me away?!!!"
Then Azog lost his balance and fell into the lake! ! Then Azog evolved into a diving expert with super lung capacity and backstroke under the ice. ! ! ! ! Then the eldest uncle followed the Azog under the ice to go forward! ! ! ! Is your foot pierced? ! ! ! Forget it if you are thrown down! ! ! ! ! Have to change the upper position! ! ! ! ! Didn't you see Azog feel like a climax? ! ! ! ! Then the uncle died! ! ! ! What a sad plot! ! ! But what a decisive battle! ! ! At that time, there were still people laughing in the midnight scene that the host was watching! ! ! ! !
Before my uncle died, he finally gave up and saw his true love (mistake)! ! ! ! ! Let him go back and plant a tree! ! ! ! ! Because you think of me when you see that tree! ! ! ! The crew is so corrupt for what you want! ! ! Uncle and Bilbo's affectionate look at each other in the whole film has caught up with Twilight! ! ! The official CP show Enai show is so confident! ! ! The uncle who is obsessed with Cai also gave Mithril underwear! ! ! Bilbo put it on and said shyly, my dear, do you think I look good in this way I look ridiculous! ! ! ! Did you see your uncle's broken eyes when you sent the gems away? ! ! ! ! What my kin betrayed me what I want to protect property! ! ! ! ! It wasn't until the moment when I was betrayed by CP that I understood what the fear in my heart (Bogut?!) was! ! ! !
Uncle is really poor! ! ! ! ! Standing alone on the wall! ! ! ! Bilbo betrayed by his side! ! ! ! ! Under the wall, there is his former CP king who has long been looking for a new love, Bud! ! ! ! The affectionate Baba of the two bereaved wives and their own babies is dry and raging! ! ! Feelings arose in the temper of a common destiny! ! ! ! , The two are riding a pony together, as if biren came to the former uncle to post an invitation! ! ! The witnesses are standing behind the dried tofu! ! ! Uncle flanked back and forth! ! ! ! The mental shock is too great! ! ! ! Don't believe in love anymore! ! Only gold! ! ! ! Gold is real! ! ! ! Uncle is forced to be so materially! ! !
*****
Finally Bilbo ran home and found that he had forgotten the handkerchief. The bottom hole of the bag is still the bottom hole of the bag. When Pippin ran out to sing My last goodbye, the same sketches seemed to be returning to Into the west where the king returned that year.
Time flies, I have finished telling your story, and I have already grayed out.
I bid you all a very fine farewell.
(Picture and text version stamp here: http://tieba.baidu.com/p/3489034395 )
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