The first time I watched "Finding Nemo 1" seems to be when I was in college. I don't remember the exact time anymore, but I still remember the story of my father looking for his son. Last weekend, I watched it again with a few children at a friend's house, but I had a different experience. What I learned the most this time is that Nemo didn't believe that Dad would look for him until he met him. In his heart, he couldn't feel his father's love, so when he was caught, he was very depressed and didn't have the confidence to escape.
Why is this so?
Let us return to the previous clip of the film. It is not difficult to find that because the wife and all the other children (fish eggs) have suffered bad luck, only Nemo survives, so the clownfish father will inevitably overprotect him, afraid of losing the only remaining child. . But under this kind of over-tension mentality, what it brings is a stern and authoritarian tone, a restless attitude and setting too many boundaries. Without the watering of love, this kind of parent-child interaction will only bring about the child's resistance and rebellion. Command and force cannot cultivate children's obedience, only temporary submission, and the price is the increasingly alienated parent-child relationship. As the child grows up, when the parents' orders and force gradually cannot suppress the child, it will trigger the child's resistance and opposition. Then the child will not succumb, and the parents will find themselves helpless.
Nemo's father undoubtedly loves him, and he has personally cared for his little roe since he was not born. As he grew up a little bit, his father has always been a part-time mother, working hard to protect him and feed him. But Nemo couldn't feel his father's love. He only felt that his father had given him too much restraint and commands, which made him unable to live and play freely.
How similar is this to today's society? How many parents also hide their love behind many nagging, commands, and demands, so that their children cannot feel love, but only feel pressured, persecuted, without freedom, and without respect.
So how should we make our children feel our love?
Here I recommend a book-"Children's Love Language" by Dr. Gary Chapman. In this book, the author clearly explained their five love languages from the perspective of children:
Affirmative words; actions of service; physical contact; time of concentration; elaborate gifts.
Generally speaking, most children are more sensitive to the two love words "affirmative words" and "physical contact". In this film, Nemo's father's speech and body language are opposite, so the feeling for Nemo is undoubtedly cold and loveless. Under this premise, no matter how much "service action" is provided, it will not be able to moisturize the child's heart.
Later, when Nemo heard Pelican talk about his father's heroic deeds on the sea floor, he still couldn't believe it. When he saw the father in Pelican's mouth with his own eyes, the small universe in his heart was suddenly ignited! It turns out that his father loves him, and he really traveled thousands of miles to find him! Because of the feeling of being loved, his confidence and desire to survive have been stimulated. He immediately completed the challenge that he could not complete before, and he was full of expectations that he could escape and reunite with his father.
This self-sacrificing rescue operation through various difficulties and obstacles is a deeper kind of "service operation", which made Nemo deeply feel his father's love, so it completely changed him.
A person's real change is because of feeling love.
So where can we start to change? From the simplest "words of affirmation". It is not only the usual greetings and affirmations, but also blessings and expressions in special times. For example, on the other party’s birthday, Father’s Day, Mother’s Day, Children’s Day, Double Ninth Festival, etc., all the blessings and expressions of love can be set in advance with the "Chat Assistant" software, and they will be automatically sent out on that day.
We can search for "chat assistant" on the website, then download the corresponding version, and then register. Use the "timer" to set the date and time, and edit the content sent in advance, and it can also be used across a variety of different chat software.
Love is not only hidden deep in the heart, but also spoken out loud in various ways. Only in this way can we have the "ability to love" and gain a true "love relationship".
View more about Finding Nemo reviews
