Gangster day trip with two old smokers

Jerad 2022-03-18 09:01:01

We are a pair of hard-working old smokers. Since skilled craftsmen took us into this world, we have never had a good day. We were first taken by our owner to hunt in Africa, and we had close contact with countless elephants and rhinos. After he became addicted to hunting, we were sold to a nouveau riche by him, and we changed four wheels that would make us angry. The nouveau riche didn't understand the value of our brothers. Who has seen a beautiful shotgun like ours, or exactly the same TWINS! He thought the barrels of our brothers were too long, so he was thinking about transforming us into short shotguns. Fortunately he didn't understand, so he showed it to his friend Sir Epton. This Sir Epton is an expert in gun collectors. He fell in love with our brothers when he saw our brothers. He gave the nouveau riche a lot of money to buy dozens of steaming wheels. At this time, our brothers settled down, living in the glass cabinet of Sir Epton's house.
Many, many years later, Sir Appleton, Little Appleton, Sir Little Appleton, and Sir Little Appleton, we still lived well in glass cabinets, and were given to us by a careful butler every day. Wipe off the dust on each piece. We have witnessed the life of the little Sir Epton, and when he became the old Sir Epton, he went bankrupt. After the old and old Sir Epton went bankrupt, he did nothing else and watched our brothers in a daze every day. We feel deeply disturbed, the feeling of ease and comfort is gone, and the turbulent and dangerous days seem to be coming back soon.
Later, Sir Epton went away, as if to deal with his real estate in another place. We resumed our carefree days, listening to the old housekeeper Peter's nagging when we wipe the dust every day. Until one night...
The whole room fell asleep peacefully, and we lay in the closet to rest. Suddenly there was a slight click, and then two short men rushed in. A boy with a bird's nest on his head picked up a vase of Sir Little Epton, and was immediately scolded by another boy with a fishing net on his face. They were churning in the cabinets in the outbuilding. We lived there before. There were still many guns in the collection of Sir Epton, but since the young Sir Epton watched us, our brothers were kept alone. In a cabinet in the back room. Listening to them yelling "gun, gun", we were scared and anxious. At this moment, we felt lightly picked up. It turned out that Old Peter rushed to hear the sound. Old Peter ran to the outhouse with us, and he panted as he ran, getting closer, getting closer. We saw the light in the outbuilding. Suddenly, Old Peter picked me up and fired a shot outside the house. The fishnet face fell on the ground in fright. We only saw that the bird's nest had been bombed out by half. It was a pity for the unhatched bird inside. The kid holding the bird's nest rushed in angrily and kicked old Peter and us. We lay on the ground for a while before being picked up by the two boys and went to the yard. When we finally looked back, Old Peter was still lying motionless on the ground.
We saw the four nasty wheels again, but this time they were all out of breath. We were thrown into the house above the wheels, with many other guns. This calmed us a little bit. But we are so worried about our next destiny, what has this world become? We don't know at all, we have to know that we haven't been out for more than a hundred years.
I don’t know how long the door was suddenly opened. We saw a fat man standing in the light outside talking to the bird’s nest. He took out a few pieces of paper with the queen’s head and gave it to the bird’s nest. That's it! We were sold again, but this time it was much less than what Sir Epton saw when he bought us last time. It seems that the bird's nest head hates us for blasting his unhatched bird's nest. The big fat man picked us up from a pile of guns and threw them into his house on four wheels.
I don't know how long it took, and the door was opened again. This time we saw a thin and tall man talking to the big fat man. They kept saying "seven hundred, seven hundred", and now we know we have been sold again and sold so cheaply, my God! You know we are two old smokers!
The tall lanky man took us to a dilapidated apartment, where there were also three tall lanky men. They watched around us together, and laughed at us, saying that even the bullets might not be shot. If we can speak human words, we must let them go and see the head of the bird's nest to see if there are our bullets in that bird's nest.
There was movement next door, and the four boys looked out the window nervously. After a while, they picked us up and rushed into the next room. The room was big and empty, and the three boys were wearing woolen hats with a few holes on their faces, waiting for us at the door.
Suddenly, a few men in yellow clothes rushed into the house, holding many bags in their hands. Some were filled with grass and some were filled with paper. We know the paper, the same as the ones that Sir Epton and Fatty brought out. , It's money, a lot of money. The three boys rushed up with us, and the men in yellow clothes all slumped to the ground and got tied up. Oh, so we became the murder weapon of robbery! After more than a hundred years of peaceful days, when we encounter this kind of scene, we will inevitably be enthusiastic and gearing up, but we are dangling with our kid, but we didn't pull the trigger. This made our brothers so frustrated, it seems that they still didn't believe that we could shoot the bullet.
After the robbery was completed, we returned to the small ruined house next door. After completing our mission, we were ruthlessly abandoned and stayed with the pile of money and the pile of grass. Looking at the pile of things we got because of us, we still feel very proud.
One night passed, our pride gradually disappeared, and fear enveloped us again. I really don't know what the fate will be this time. Just as we were thinking about it, there was a loud noise, and we saw a head drilled through the wall, and then several heads came through, and then several whole people came through. Just those guys in yellow clothes. They were completely ecstatic when they saw our expressions, and we were also very happy, thinking that they had found a soulmate. Who knows, they just frantically fished the paper and grass behind us, then moved them all upstairs, and we were left aside again. Just as we were extremely depressed, a bald-looking head took us upstairs.
We were bored upstairs watching the bald head counting papers. He counted the papers carefully and put them in the bag carefully. I really don't understand how these people, beautiful and extremely lethal weapons like ours, are not as good as a pile of paper! Just as the bald head count was full of joy, the earthquake broke out! There was a loud noise everywhere downstairs, and the bald head opened the door a crack, and immediately began to see blood on his face. what! It was not an earthquake, it was a gunfight! We looked at the bald heads expectantly, hoping that he would take us downstairs and let us compete with the younger generations in a hundred years from now. But we bet the wrong treasure again. The looking bald head turned out to be a coward. He took us and the bag of money and opened the window and jumped down. As soon as we landed, we felt our bald heads being knocked off, a pair of extremely powerful hands snatched us from him, and of course the nasty bag of money. At this time, we knew that we were involved in the gang struggle. It seems that today we cannot meet good people, let alone those who admire us. 55
After a long time, we arrived in a luxuriously decorated room, and we met Harry. We know his name because we saw his name on the table when the powerful hand dedicated us respectfully to him. Harry was different from everyone we met today. He focused all his eyes on us and ignored the bag of money. This made us feel extremely comfortable, as if we were back in the cabinet of Sir Epton, and we were admired preciously every day.
Harry held us in his hands and very carefully helped us wipe off the dust we had gotten from the day we ran, and we missed the old Peter's care for us again. But I didn’t expect this treatment to come for a long time, and the door was opened roughly again. We saw the fishnet face rushing in. Harry took me without hesitation and fired at the fishnet face, and neither did I. He hesitantly fired two bullets, both of which hit the face of the fishing net. When Harry and I were both triumphant, the birdhouse rushed in, picked up the gun in his hand and shot
Harry randomly, and we just watched the second person who admired us fell to the ground. The next thing happened so quickly that we didn't have time to see clearly, we saw the bird's nest head down on the ground, with a silver axe stuck in the back. Although we are extremely lethal weapons, we cannot avenge Harry.
We were again in depression and couldn't help ourselves. At this time, the tall and thin boys came. One of them wanted to run away with that nasty bag of money. The other named TOM (the one who bought us) took a look at us and decided Stay and take care of us. This gives us hope again. Worried about what happened to him like Harry. Sure enough, that powerful hand appeared before long. He and TOM confronted for a while, and then TOM took us away.
After this rainy day, we miss our peaceful life so much, lying in the car of TOM, we look forward to him being kind to us. Who knows, he still took us to a bridge and even wanted to throw us into the river... What is our fate? If you want to know, let’s watch Guy Ritchie’s movie "Two Smokers" for our experience~

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Extended Reading

Lock, Stock and Two Smoking Barrels quotes

  • Dean: [after seeing Gary holding a candle under the house owner's feet] Whoa, whoa Kenny! What are you doing?

    Gary: I am trying to find out where they keep their money!

    Dean: You twat! Can't you see these people have got no money? They can't even afford new furniture! We've got the guns, whats the matter with you? Everytime we do a job, you have to go burning people's feet, whats wrong with you?

  • Barry the Baptist: [answering his phone] What?

    Dean: I thought you said there'd be no staff Barry!

    Barry the Baptist: Did you get those guns?

    Dean: You wanna see what they did to poor Gary?

    [calling out to a delirious Gary]

    Dean: Gary? Gary?

    Barry the Baptist: I said, did you get those guns?

    Dean: YES, WE GOT THEM!

    Barry the Baptist: Good, I'll speak to you later

    [hangs up the phone]

    Dean: Gary, if you can hear me, get back in the car now mate okay?

    [turning his attention back to Barry]

    Dean: Barry? Barry? Fucking sodding shandy-drinking bastard!