This article was written in March 2015
If anyone wants to know what stories have happened to me, I recommend the movie "Burst Drummer". My story is the burst jazz drummer in the publishing world. I watched it for 40 minutes on the plane flying to Bologna to participate in the Children’s Book Fair. Every second at that time couldn’t help but want to call my Fletcher and ask him if he had watched this film, although I knew I was not. The so-called genius, I would rather believe that he saw me as a possible Neyman indoctrination, and I finished watching the remaining hour on the plane back home.
Darkness rose, tears fell.
At this point in time today, I still met countless times in my dreams at the scene of fierce confrontation. I met after the reconciliation, and I often cried until I woke up. I was grateful that the nightmare was over after waking up, but I still have grief. Whether he considers me the Neyman or not, I also want to thank him for everything that the devilish training brought me back then.
Those friends who have witnessed everything, don’t be sentimental for me, don’t pity me, I never cry, I never feel pitiful, I love to laugh, everything goes well for me, a humble ordinary person Maybe it has nothing to do with the so-called genius, but I have obsessions.
Perseverance makes me tenacious and hardworking, so some people say that I have pure light on my body, and some people say that I have a two-strength. No matter whether it is pure or two, but at least this kind of life is not fake, not boring, not empty. I live in this world with clear goals, high morale, and maybe boring, but I am willing to do this too.
This movie is too complicated for me. It is so complicated that I cannot judge it by the merits of the movie itself, but it is certainly not because it is bad. Because it seems that every second of it reproduces my previous encounters, a recruit who thinks that being selected as the editor-in-chief can make it to the sky in one step, a paranoid instructor who is known for bursting, mental breakdowns under heavy pressure, tears of humiliation, and viciousness. 'S curse...
In every scene I saw my heart tumbling, palms sweating, and scalp numb. Perhaps no one knew how the days of crying in the office in the early morning came, and no one had ever seen the soldiers you led resign and leave in the office late at night... …Now think about the purgatory days that have passed so long. Along the way, I have seen countless so-called geniuses with outstanding words and talents, but the success is very rare. Perhaps success does not require genius, and genius is difficult to succeed.
Like me, I have mediocre talents, no talent for food and food, obsessed with all kinds of humble delusions every day, willing to be a substitute for the jokes of my colleagues, is a lone marcher who is unsuccessful and benevolent. I hope that someday God will be able to give me a slight smile because of my persistence, blood and tears dripping on the drum. Therefore, some people say that I am not genius sick, and I don’t need genius fate.
From the perspective of a person who has walked through a highly similar "experienced person", every frame of the seemingly weird story of the master and disciple in the movie is real to the flesh, not how rude and cruel the master is, but The master is just such a super paranoid. In his eyes there is only the indignation of hating iron but not steel. He has a demanding pursuit of a decent career, and he has brought many twists and complicated emotions in his private life, combined into a turbulent scolding. You have only two options. , Or stand firmly against the slap. No time to rest, no time to sleep, no time to go home, no time to accompany wives and children, no time to take care of even mothers who are sick, have to trot all the way to the toilet, mobile phones are randomly on standby around the clock, and a missed call will cause an explosion...
These details seem to be unable to express the feeling of living in fear, that is, I don’t even believe that I am struggling from such a panic and struggling situation. I have seen countless times in various scenes in the middle of the night and the sky. In the newly bright Beijing, the most lacking thing is sleep. Tinnitus, migraine, and stomach ulcers have been plagued by it. For more than a year, the hair has fallen to alopecia areata. Go fucking editing your dreams and get rid of your mother’s financial freedom. At that time, the most All I hope is that I can sleep a solid sleep, and I even hope that I never have to wake up. This way, you don't have to continue to stand back to the office where the cigarette butt hits your face the next day, but even so, I still hint to myself that it will take a little longer before you meet the next you.
At that time, I wanted to take a sigh of relief and listen to him: This time it was finally OK, no need to change. Many people spit or even curse the perverted teaching method in the film in film reviews, feeling outrageous, paranoid, cruel, roaring, and bursting... As a person who has passed by, I also feel that life is better than death, but now I look back and learn from the pain. Suspension is an obscure shit mediocre, mediocre, procrastinating, good teacher, pretentious, loves to make excuses, and has everything to do with faintness. If it weren't for such a bursting teacher to start the hell-style destruction and reconstruction mode, maybe I will only be today. In the declining river, mediocrity will be more thorough.
I’m not saying that I’m getting rid of the mediocre facts now, just like the last ending in this movie, even if the once rookie is no longer a rookie, he is constantly running on the road to surpass himself, even crossing the peak of fascination, waiting for you The peak experience is only the corner of the mouth slightly raised at the last second. For me, for the rest of my life, there is still no light in the darkness of the theater after the movie ends...
So far, this road has been tossing in the publishing industry for more than ten years. I just went from a small publisher to a third-rate editor, and then a third-rate publisher. I thought that I had crossed the limit countless times, but after standing there, I realized that I just got my admission certificate. What's more sad is that in my heart this great road that is so solemn and holy and worthy of the painstaking effort is nothing but a flamboyant ticket to others. A genius is always at best hardworking to a mediocrity...
Moreover, many people also complain that publishing is dead. What I want to say is that those who die first must be those who make a living every day. The instructor in the movie said that there is no word worse than the word "good job" in the English world. This world never treats people who work well, and they may not succeed if they work hard, but knowing that they are working hard is the driving force for living in this mediocre world. There are ten thousand reasons to roll to the end of utter mediocrity. Only a slap in the face can make us surpass our limits time and time again. My heart said, don't stay and wait, just let the light refract the tear-drenched pupils, reflect the rainbow that I want to have most in my heart, and lead me to the new my sky, because that is my direction.
But maybe many years later, mediocrity may be the last answer in our life, and it may also be a paradox that cannot be escaped in our life.
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