Dear Mom, I dont know where to start, so I'll just begin with the end and work my way back. I came home because I ran out of money and had nowhere else to go. If I'd had any other option I would have taken it. I did not consider having a place to come home to a blessing. instead, I thought of it as a burden and a symbol of failure.I'm ashamed to admit that growing up pitied you and what I thought was your naive belief that our dreams could come ture simply by virtue of having them. Because the truth, as I witnessed it, was something completely different. The truth actually was that nothing worked out and no one anywhere lived the life they wanted. But I see now it was me with the naive belief. I thought if I resigned myself to disappointment, at least I'd be better off than those people who tried and failed.I hate myself only realize this now and for taking and taking from you without giving anything back...I promise not to wast anymore time or your love for granted ever again. I love you so much Jim
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