Written on 2014-02-13
This is a lonely and dumb feeling, which cannot be understood or even told, so it is warm with sadness.
Two people who share the same disease, the disadvantaged group in society, wandering on the fringes of the social group. One has been imprisoned (even for his relatives) and has lived under the colored eyes of the world ever since. Anyone can preach to him, and anyone can order him to do things according to his own wishes. One is a disabled person with cerebral palsy who was abandoned by his relatives. The disabled benefits that he should have enjoyed were easily taken away by his relatives, and no one really cared. She, the neighbor who seems to be kind and responsible for her daily life, the only brother who seems to care about her sister, and the sister-in-law who seems to be virtuous, all show contempt and disgust in her eyes, and all her actions show indifference and alienation.
No one wants to listen to them, no one wants to bow down to respect and understand them on an equal footing, and no one really cares about them.
So, they are together.
They saw their own shadows in each other—the marginalized people who were ignored, alienated, resented. Therefore, he couldn't help approaching her quietly, not only with guilt, he couldn't help but approach her when he met her, almost insulted her, and after he fled in a hurry, he couldn't help but sneak into her house... And she, She was almost insulted, but she didn't strongly reject his approach again. Thinking about it, she also unknowingly planted the seeds of affection in her heart.
That's how they were together. I don't think it's just love, more, it contains a kind of sympathy, a silent understanding between people who are sympathetic to each other. He started her life. She could only be alive in those days before, but he pushed her to the rooftop to see the blue sky. Maybe it was the first time she looked up at the sky for such a long time. Because the paralysis kept twitching, she couldn't speak or do anything, but at that time, there was a clear smile in her eyes. He carried her to go shopping, go to restaurants, sing KTV, and even take her to family banquets, telling her interesting stories of childhood under all the shocked and scornful eyes, laughing like a couple, and Everyone thought he was crazy, and they all thought he brought her here to embarrass his eldest brother, because he took the blame for his eldest brother, and she was the victim's daughter.
Therefore, by the time he was misunderstood and raped her in the end, no one would have thought that they had feelings. This is not in line with common sense, and it is not in line with the human nature of seeking advantages and avoiding disadvantages.
See, normal people are always smart, take it for granted, make rules that seem to be seamless, and divide normal people and abnormal people according to the rules. The police asked him if he was crazy, and they decided he was crazy because they couldn't figure out how he could rape a disabled man who was terribly ugly because of his incessant convulsions. And he didn't explain, maybe he knew that even if he said he liked her and said that they were together, none of those normal people would believe it, and maybe they would charge him with fabricated charges. The world of the lunatic is incomprehensible to normal people, and lunatic does not need to understand. They are already enjoying themselves in their own world. Who told those normal people to break in?
Finally, he escaped, ran downstairs to her house, climbed the tree by her window, and chopped off all the shadowy branches for her, for the mottled shadows they cast on the portraits in her house would make her Fear. The painting was an oasis with elephants and indigenous people, only divided into pieces by the swaying shadows of trees. And he promised her that he would turn into magic and give her an oasis.
He really gave her an oasis, she knew.
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