Regarding the "Marriage Story", my friend talked to me about the destruction of marriage by lawyers: Originally, the man and woman had feelings for each other, but because of the divorce, they were instigated by lawyers to expose the old bottom, hurt each other, and parted ways, although the two ended up. To clear up the previous suspicions, but also to go their own way and never go back to the past.
When I watched the movie, I felt that the lawyers in the film were all good lawyers. The first old lawyer the male protagonist found was very empathetic and knew what was really important emotionally for the male protagonist, compared to litigation lawyers. Now, he seems more suitable to be a mediator. The other two female litigation lawyers and male lawyers are very practical, well versed in the rules of the game and do their best to maximize the benefits of their clients.
Some people say that marriage is not a game between two people. It is not about winning or losing, but about feelings. The purpose of divorce is that both people can handle the relationship well, get back together or break up peacefully, but the lawyers only focus on winning and getting things done. The whole divorce process became very ugly.
The truth is that the truth is true, but not everyone can empathize with each other, and not everyone can put himself in and understand that the harm he causes to you is a big deal. For example, the male protagonist, in fact, the female protagonist already knows that it is impossible to maintain such a non-independent marriage, but even if the two people go to divorce mediation, the male protagonist does not realize that the female protagonist wants to leave him, and only thinks that she is only going to California Take a new play and relax. The night before the heroine left New York, he wanted to listen to the hero for the last time, so he held back tears and asked him what he thought of her acting skills, but he didn't see it at all. He looked confident and seriously started to provoke her problems—as if She complained to him, talked to him about wanting to divorce, and so on. They were all children's temper tantrums, and after a while, she would be better. He was dominant in the marriage relationship and didn't think she was a man at all. Independent individual, don't believe that she really has the ability to leave him.
This kind of power dynamic has already penetrated into all aspects of their lives. If the male protagonist wants to stay in New York to do drama, the female protagonist has to give up her film career and stay away from family and friends to support him. The female protagonist has repeatedly said that she wants to return to her hometown in Los Angeles to live for a period of time, and the male protagonist can obviously get a job opportunity, but she refuses again and again on the grounds that the job in New York is important (but occasionally the male protagonist gets the job opportunity in Copenhagen, but he has no hesitation After going to work for a year, I shut up and did not mention the importance of working in New York).
The nature of the problem in this marriage was explained to the nail on the head when the female lawyer questioned the male lead, "So your idea is the plan, and your wife's idea is just talking?" The male lead treats the female lead, not like An adult treats another equal adult, and it is more like an untrustworthy parent who treats a difficult child: the child is clamoring and asking the parents to take her to the park on weekends, and the father wants to block the child’s Mouth, let yourself be clean for a while, so you pretend to agree right now, but at the weekend, you pretend to forget about it, and nothing will be done. At this time, as a child, if you quarrel with your father, "Why don't you keep your word, and I also have the right to go to the park." Would it be useful? Your father would say, "Where is the work of an adult in the park important? When can you not go, do you have to go now?" In the face of a person who is much stronger than you, how can you wake him up and make him calm and careful Consider your demands? If parents treat their children as seriously as they treat themselves, there will probably not be so many teenagers running away from home or even dying.
The female protagonist is obviously an adult with independent thinking, but she is regarded as an unimportant and unimportant child. This kind of life is very suffocating to think about, but those with vested interests in power are not willing to stop at all. He opened his eyes and saw that she was also a living person, even if she was not a living person in his heart, how could he empathize with her? His world only has a powerful and boundless self. After he even arrived in California, his son said to his face that he wanted to stay in Los Angeles and he liked to be with his mother. The male protagonist refused to admit it and felt that he was instigated by the female bishop.
At this time, only by becoming stronger and letting the hero see her power can this situation be reversed. Fortunately, the hostess is not a child after all, she can turn to lawyers and justice. Indeed, with the "help" of lawyers, the two clearly in love with each other in court exposed each other, tore it ugly, and personally smashed years of intimacy and trust. But the lawyer did help the female protagonist win and gave the male protagonist a heavy blow. It turns out that he is not the one with full power. It turns out that he can also be so powerless in the marriage relationship. Thoughts, adults who deserve to be treated seriously. That's why the protagonist finally got the consciousness to take the job offer from UCLA and move to Los Angeles to work. The male lead finally learned to listen to the female lead. It's just that this enlightenment came too late, and they can no longer go back to the past-but the enlightenment that comes later is better than eternal confusion.
Winning here is a goal, and it is no longer a goal. All kinds of struggles are just for him to learn to face her and listen to her. But some people, if they don’t let him stumble and suffer hardships, he will always Can't understand these truths.
When the case was about to be settled, although the man and woman had originally planned to split the custody rights equally between the two, the female lawyer changed to 55 for the woman and 45 for the man, because the female lawyer just wanted to win and didn’t want the man to think that she got 50/50. . The hostess did not raise any objections. At the end, the male protagonist moved to California, and the female protagonist and the male protagonist regained their friendship. Although the female protagonist has a new partner at this time, they will never return to the past. The female protagonist offered to give up part of the custody rights and split equally with the male protagonist. This does not mean that female lawyers are superfluous-only the winner can make a gesture of giving irrespectively, and the loser stretches out his hands to accept the favor of the winner. Thinking of the magnanimity of the winner, I am grateful. And if you have been a loser from the beginning, you will never be taken seriously by the other party. People only know the pain when they are slapped, and only when they see the coffin do they know they shed tears.
This is why people need to care about winning or losing. This is why sometimes we need the judicial system, the lawyers, the ugly and cumbersome litigation, and the layers of flesh and blood need to be uncovered. This is true in marriage, and it is the same in other aspects of society. This is also why Jingyao has to win JD even if he is accused by thousands and humiliated by a slut. Why Xingyao was raped by a demon adoptive father and he must be brought to justice with humiliation and pressure. Because the weak have to win, and only when they win can they have strength and be treated as human beings.
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