I read the film reviews 12 years ago and I am really moved today.
Over the years, time has changed, and some have changed, and some have not changed.
Even though the film critics are very immature, but looking at that young boy who had a second half 12 years ago,
Sitting in front of the computer earnestly coded words, really happy.
Over the years, under this film review, so many comments, opinions and stories have been accumulated.
I especially want to invite back one by one to hear if there is a new sequel to your story.
Let me start:
Twelve years ago, 1 month after I wrote this film review, I met someone and I have been to this day.
2020.3.2
－－－－－－－－－－－－－－－－－－ One day in 2005, a friend of mine told me that if his parents forced him to marry like that, then he would write "The Wedding Banquet" Let them see. He is gay and has a boyfriend who has been dating for 3 years at the time. A few months later, he called me and was over. I said what happened. He said that because of a quarrel with his boyfriend, he went out alone to drink and got drunk. When he went home, he crossed the sofa and didn’t know anything. When he woke up early the next morning, the house was full of seven aunts and eight aunts with eyes. The flushed sobbing parents. He told his story the night before. The parents panicked and called all over the world, saying that the child might have a mental problem and needed help. So the "enthusiastic" relatives came, and you chased me out of the plan. In the next year or two, his parents met with countless psychologists for him countless times, and even took him to a mental hospital in our city for identification and examination. He is a successful man. He has both good character and good learning from his sketches. He has a gentle and elegant personality and is friendly to others. He is not yet thirty years old and has a large-scale company of his own. Today I received a text message from him. He said that in this fall, he is going to get married. I said what to do with XX, but he did not respond to me. Tonight, I found "The Wedding Banquet", and it was still a sad journey along the way. This 93-year-old film belongs to one of the Lee Ang family trilogy ("Pushing Hands", "Wedding Banquet", "Diet Men and Women"), and won numerous awards including the Berlin Golden Bear Award and the Golden Horse Award for Best Picture. . I once had a friend who told me after watching it that it was simply a comedy, from the beginning to the end. Since then, I have gradually reduced contact with this person. If you can think of this film as a comedy. , I guess I and he/she must not be confidants. But it is not difficult to understand it. Full of helplessness and sorrow. Like the story I told at the beginning, the sorrow does not lie in that a friend of mine finally succumbed and deceived his parents, deceived the person who loved him deeply, deceived the future wife and even the child who might be born, more importantly, He deceived himself after all. The real sorrow is that there are countless people around me who I know and even know. Compared with the above, there is more than the below. Perhaps the Weitong in "The Wedding Banquet" deserves more praise than them. Many people I know or know. They are not afraid of social pressure and do not care whether there are so many mocking eyes around them. They often work hard in their own circles of survival and are worthy of their youth. But the pressure from the family finally defeated all hopes and visions for a better future. Get married, live with the same woman, have children, nine to five days, go home from get off work, talk and laugh with his wife, play with the children, and then stay in front of the computer for work reasons, wait for his wife and children to sleep, and hurriedly open the gay website. Immersed in the pleasure of obscenity, after smoking the last cigarette, he sighed and went to bed. day to day. At first, when someone deceived themselves and decided to end everything by getting married, I was so panicked, hurriedly texting and calling, even making appointments to meet and talk, trying to tell them that this is not the end, this is another painful beginning. 'S life will turn into a mess that sticks together. In all likelihood, they said: "You don't understand, you don't have such pressure." Then they gradually avoided answering my phone. Finally one day, I found helplessly, like a clown, I was worried that my friend would betray my soul and all the people who loved them, including my parents. They won't pay attention to me, or even to themselves. When there is any idea of living on the opposite side, they immediately divert their attention in a panic. Tell yourself that I can love women, I can have children, and I can live a "normal" life like all "normal people". Wei Tong in the film is slightly better. Decided to deal with extremely traditional parents with fake marriages. So a farce was staged. The white wedding dress and bright red cheongsam are a lively and peaceful wedding banquet. But in front of the audience who knows all the insider, it looks funny and helpless. The guest at the wedding banquet that Ang Li guest starred, there is a line in the film: "This is the result of China's five thousand years of sexual repression." In fact, those who can see it fully understand that the people represented by this film are not limited to the topic of homosexuality. Too many people around us, like the protagonist in the film, deceive themselves and try to escape the problems of life in various ways. But today I don't want to comment on this movie from this perspective. I just want to quietly tell everyone who is in this crowd or who cares about this crowd, all my feelings. Moving movies are not the ones that make you cry. A film that really makes people feel, will make you choked and unable to say anything. I have watched "Wedding Banquet" four times, and each time there will be new discoveries, but what remains the same is the silence and depression all the way. In the whole film, the only part that made me cry is that Dad Gao and Simon were sitting on the beach and spoke English. So we knew that he actually knew English, that is to say, he knew his son. Is gay. When your studies are complete and your job is stable, the next step any parent thinks is getting married. But helplessly, just like the line of Gao’s mother: "If you don’t explain to others, what kind of marriage?" From the moment we were born, it gradually became clear that our life was not born here for ourselves. international. We live for too many people, physically and mentally exhausted, but we must break our teeth and swallow them. So many men who don't love women eventually get married and have children. After the rest of their lives, those previous things are silently locked in a rusty biscuit box, reluctant to throw it away, and dare not open it. What I want to say here is actually another meaning conveyed by "The Wedding Banquet": that is bravery, calmness and trust. At the end of the film, we know that the Gao family’s parents are aware of the fact that their son is gay. It's just that everything is slowly disappearing in the passage of the airport in an atmosphere of inexplicability. This is what makes people moving. Their acceptance comes from protecting the family. And because of this, I believe that in the end they will understand these children who are living under various pressures and constantly forcing themselves to suppress certain emotions, those children who are in pain. Are there people in the world who will never leave you, accept all your faults and willfulness, and still continue to love you even more? The answer is yes, this is your parents. Since the starting point of everything comes from love, happiness is the end. If children can get happiness, it will be the greatest comfort to these old people with gray hair. I have two friends. They have been in contact for nearly seven years. The romance took place in their university, and the beginning of the story was winter. They are still studying together in the classroom, holding milk tea for a walk on the moon night, taking the postgraduate entrance examination together, working together, and living together. After being in love for two years, he resolutely moved between the two parents in one night. After that, one person was slapped with a nosebleed, and the other was smashed to the head by a teacup. Early that morning, they were walking on the empty street, tears streaming down their faces, and then burst into laughter, kissing and hugging on the side of the road. Later, one of them told me with tears in his eyes that it was the happiest thing in my life, and it was also the happiest moment in my life. But the subsequent process is indeed not easy. The parents of both sides met with each other and decided to work together to break this "deformed" relationship. Two years later, on New Year's Eve, the two families sat together, watching the Spring Festival Gala and making dumplings. The friend's father smiled and told him that he had two sons. He told me that he actually knew the sadness and stress experienced by his parents. Some unexpected things happened in my own home dramatically, which is really surprising enough. "But they love me," he said. So, there are still such examples, right? For parents, why not replace resentment with trust, and why not replace self-defeating and abandoning oneself with frank honesty. As long as love exists. Then a home will not be broken because of this. After all, its existence is for love. In today's impetuous society, men and women can't die of old age, let alone in a circle that doesn't have to be responsible for each other at all. Now that you have met or will meet someone who will never leave you, there are great reasons not to allow all self-deception to bury the pursuit of life and love. It is not easy to be able to live a happy and healthy life. Why use your life as a bet to try to win those illusory and impossible fantasies? Of course, you can tell yourself over and over again that I can actually get married. I can actually explain to my parents, relatives, and all those who are so-called "responsible" for their existence. Then, you can find a "hearted" woman, with whom she will always "live happily together." And I just want to tell myself, be brave to love. If life loses this reason to fight for, then it cannot be called life. -------------------------- And I just want to tell myself, be brave to love. If life loses this reason to fight for, then it cannot be called life. -------------------------- And I just want to tell myself, be brave to love. If life loses this reason to fight for, then it cannot be called life. -------------------------- And I just want to tell myself, be brave to love. If life loses this reason to fight for, then it cannot be called life. -------------------------- And I just want to tell myself, be brave to love. If life loses this reason to fight for, then it cannot be called life. -------------------------- And I just want to tell myself, be brave to love. If life loses this reason to fight for, then it cannot be called life. -------------------------- And I just want to tell myself, be brave to love. If life loses this reason to fight for, then it cannot be called life. -------------------------- And I just want to tell myself, be brave to love. If life loses this reason to fight for, then it cannot be called life. -------------------------- And I just want to tell myself, be brave to love. If life loses this reason to fight for, then it cannot be called life. -------------------------- He told me that he actually knew the sadness and stress experienced by his parents. Some unexpected things happened in my own home dramatically, which is really surprising enough. "But they love me," he said. So, there are still such examples, right? For parents, why not replace resentment with trust, and why not replace self-defeating and abandoning oneself with frank honesty. As long as love exists. Then a home will not be broken because of this. After all, its existence is for love. In today's impetuous society, men and women can't die of old age, let alone in a circle that doesn't have to be responsible for each other at all. Now that you have met or will meet someone who will never leave you, there are great reasons not to allow all self-deception to bury the pursuit of life and love. It is not easy to be able to live a happy and healthy life. Why use your life as a bet to try to win those illusory and impossible fantasies? Of course, you can tell yourself over and over again that I can actually get married. I can actually explain to my parents, relatives, and all those who are so-called "responsible" for their existence. Then, you can find a "hearted" woman, with whom she will always "live happily together." And I just want to tell myself, be brave to love. If life loses this reason to fight for, then it cannot be called life. -------------------------- He told me that he actually knew the sadness and stress experienced by his parents. Some unexpected things happened in my own home dramatically, which is really surprising enough. "But they love me," he said. So, there are still such examples, right? For parents, why not replace resentment with trust, and why not replace self-defeating and abandoning oneself with frank honesty. As long as love exists. Then a home will not be broken because of this. After all, its existence is for love. In today's impetuous society, men and women can't die of old age, let alone in a circle that doesn't have to be responsible for each other at all. Now that you have met or will meet someone who will never leave you, there are great reasons not to allow all self-deception to bury the pursuit of life and love. It is not easy to be able to live a happy and healthy life. Why use your life as a bet to try to win those illusory and impossible fantasies? Of course, you can tell yourself over and over again that I can actually get married. I can actually explain to my parents, relatives, and all those who are so-called "responsible" for their existence. Then, you can find a "hearted" woman, with whom she will always "live happily together." And I just want to tell myself, be brave to love. If life loses this reason to fight for, then it cannot be called life. -------------------------- Of course, you can tell yourself over and over again that I can actually get married. I can actually explain to my parents, relatives, and all those who are so-called "responsible" for their existence. Then, you can find a "hearted" woman, with whom she will always "live happily together." And I just want to tell myself, be brave to love. If life loses this reason to fight for, then it cannot be called life. -------------------------- Of course, you can tell yourself over and over again that I can actually get married. I can actually explain to my parents, relatives, and all those who are so-called "responsible" for their existence. Then, you can find a "hearted" woman, with whom she will always "live happily together." And I just want to tell myself, be brave to love. If life loses this reason to fight for, then it cannot be called life. --------------------------
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