He went home to announce the terrible news to his family. There are many times in the movie that he wanted to blurt out, but because of lack of courage or family reasons, he did not say anything when he finally left home. He is like the little bird at the end of the film. He ran across the house and couldn't fly out, and he couldn't be relieved to death.
In the movie, Dolan did not explicitly state the key clue [the male protagonist has AIDS and will die]. Only the audience who understands the original can understand what is going on. This method of concealing the cause of the heroine also caused some foreign media to criticize Dolan's film. But in fact, different people have different opinions.
I think that knowing that the hero's death is approaching from the beginning will better understand the emotions and environment that the movie wants to express.
The audience can see that the male protagonist was relatively healthy at the beginning, but as the movie progresses, his face becomes more and more sickly, and in the end he sweats profusely, and his hair is soaked in night sweats. Seriously The pale complexion and the sunken eye sockets all explain: Death is coming!
The audience may feel that the male protagonist is silent and expressionless from start to finish. In fact, this is exactly the state of AIDS people knowing that they are dead soon. Returning to this home is actually going to be a formal farewell. But such heavy words will undoubtedly be a heavy blow to everyone in this family, and cannot be easily said.
The reason why he ran away from home more than ten years ago is not clearly stated in the movie. I guess it was probably caused by his coming out. And his running away from home has had an indelible impact on everyone in the family. His mother alone has to support the whole family, and the mother assumes the role of father. As the only male in the family, his elder brother must have a hard time supporting his family. At the same time, he had to hide his brother’s gay family scandal, so he was under a lot of pressure and had a grumpy temper. There was a close-up shot of him trying to beat the male protagonist. You can see The unhealed wound on his fist shows that he often commits domestic violence to his wife. This also explains why the male protagonist’s sister-in-law is so taciturn, and only promises, not daring to speak loudly, but daring to persuade her husband’s character in a low voice. And his sister, who has been missing a brother like him since she was a child, has such a violent temper in this home lacking a father, so she is the kind that is strong and cool on the surface, but lacks father’s love and lacks in her heart. Brother caring.
There are many scenes in the movie that Dolan has no ulterior motives. In the last scene of a family quarrel, it happened to be raining and sunny outside. The setting sun illuminates each character, indicating that all contradictions are revealed at this moment, just like a metaphor for "Thunderstorm".
My brother was telling the host that his first boyfriend (the one who left by the window in a pink MV style last) died of "cancer", in fact, he was also implying that his first boyfriend died of AIDS. At that time, AIDS was called "gay cancer"), and his brother didn't say anything about it. It is possible that the male protagonist would understand that his brother would never understand and accept the fact that he was infected with AIDS.
In the end, the family members tore the battle, and let the male lead understand that whether the conflict in the family was caused by his running away or his father's departure, it can no longer be remedied. If he said at this time If you have AIDS, you will die. Such blockbuster news is nothing more than ruining the boat and destroying the last straw of the family.
So he made a "shh" gesture to his sister-in-law, implying that he would leave in silence and bear the bad news about his imminent death alone.
He invited his sister and brother to play in his city, and promised to come back to visit them often and write more letters. But in fact, he knew in his heart that this walk was a farewell to life and death. This is just a beautiful lie that the shaky family maintains for a short time.
He is like the little bird at the end of the film, running rampant in this contradictory home. He couldn't fly out until he died, he didn't explain it until he died, and he didn't untie the knot of the family until he died. With the death knot opened, he was full of desolation and helplessness, but he was powerless and helpless.
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