When I met Ellie, she already had a daughter. But she still has the feelings of a girl-romantic, bold, sweet, and easily moved. He is so handsome, she is so damned, they are together. When enthusiasm for life later, her husband is often away from home, two children need to be taken care of, work pressure, etc., make her feel distressed and confused but have nowhere to tell, and she is exhausted to cope. He seemed to be aware of the crisis and hoped to warm her with more love. She did not hide her fragility and tried to talk to him. She also realized that her already latent and growing alcohol addiction could ruin her marriage and even her children.
In the Alcohol Rehabilitation Center, she found a comfortable environment for herself: without disguising her perfect image, and speaking freely without disguising. They are of the same kind, sympathizing, comforting and encouraging each other, she felt the joy of being understood and needed.
During the month of abstaining from drinking Allie, Michael dealt with various difficult family problems: children fighting and crying, lack of supplies at home, chaos, and the risk of being laid off. Various conditions made him feel frustrated and lose control of his emotions. -Yelling roughly at the nanny. In order not to lose his job, he tried to use his father's authority to persuade the eldest daughter to live with the grandmother she didn't like, but was refused by the few-year-old child: You can't force me, it's not my fault. He let go of his dignity that likes to control the situation and apologized to the nanny and begged her to come back. His daughters watched the father take responsibility in the wrong way of admitting himself. He actively faces the problems in life, and he believes that the difficulties are only temporary. Indeed, he did a great job-well, as long as he is willing to solve it, it's not that difficult. He believes that his wife can quit drinking soon, and the family can still return to normal, warm and cozy.
Michael arranged everything in an orderly manner. Bring back his wife with confidence. His care and thoughtfulness made her feel like a sinful child. He took care of the things at home and made her feel no longer important, and interrupted her to deal with the child's disputes and made her think she was contemptuous of her. Her impulse to drink a drink at any time also told her-she failed to quit drinking, and she also caught smoking. He also tried to change himself to accept and understand, to participate in gatherings of family members of alcoholics; at Ellie’s suggestion, to receive psychological counseling together; but he didn’t really understand (and didn’t want to understand) those alcoholics, he didn’t at all. I am willing to believe that my beautiful and lovely wife is an alcoholic, and do not try to listen to stories about alcoholics. He believes that those who can't quit drinking are because they don't have the ability to solve problems, they are just a group of self-pity people. He didn't understand their difficulty in self-control. He was angry at his wife's inability to quit drinking, and believed that he was deeply responsible-as a husband, he was unable to get his beloved wife to quit drinking. He felt a deep sense of frustration. He can solve mechanical problems, but he can't solve his wife's alcoholism.
She also hated her weakness and incompetence. She also blamed herself for not being able to quit her alcohol addiction and felt disgusted. His distressed expression made her feel worthless and ashamed. And his incomprehension hurt her more deeply and inspired her courage to live anew. What she needs is not tolerance or sympathy, but understanding. She does not need to be taken care of by him, but is treated equally. When Michael realized that she had rejected his caress and rejected his care, he chose to give her independent space, leave her beloved and her children, let her regain her confidence and be needed in caring for her children alone. Feelings, get a sense of accomplishment in assuming responsibility.
Seeing that she took good care of the children, Michael was very disappointed. He was eager to take responsibility, eager to be needed, eager to take care of them, just like Ellie eager to be understood at the beginning, he also began to eager for someone to listen to his voice. He stood at a distance, watching Ellie and the children in the dark, with tears in tears. . . He missed her wife, he was eager to grow up with his children, and he hoped to use his actions to show her how much he loves the Ellie who made him laugh and made him sad and weeping. He can say to all travelers: welcome back home, but he has to hide his feelings and be alone, with no home to go back and no way to approach. (I think this is the value of Michael's true love)
She completely recovered. The witty, beautiful and confident she confessed to her history of alcoholism and abstinence in the lecture. Finally, she choked and said that she regretted not keeping him. . . In the audience, he looked at her quietly, his eyes full of understanding love. He understood that at this time, their hearts were very close, very close, and they really understood each other.
He said loudly: My wife is an alcoholic, but she is the best person in the world.
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