Lucien is like a shooting star burning wanton. He mischievously lights up the dark corners that the world deliberately conceals, and those sex poems that are considered taboo, he will deliberately stand on the table and let the sound of his recitation echo in the quiet book. In the hall, if there is something like nothing, he would splash a little spark on Allen's heart, so that Allen's true self that had been hidden for many years would ignite and burn, and it would eventually shine.
*****I
can’t forget the look, joy, admiration, and infatuation of Allen when he first saw Lucien. I thought this was a beautiful prelude to the imminent beginning of a young first love. I later realized that this was a tragic omen of Allen’s stepping into the abyss. Feeling heartbreak, disappointment, suspicion, betrayal, hatred, but everything happened off guard, the person with his own soul put a soft coat on him in the quiet and uninhabited night, in the darkness that the street light could not shine. Li said:
Welcome to the edge of the world.
Knowing that it was an invitation from the devil, Allen was willing to be confused, and followed his clenched hand to an unknown Wonderland.
*****At
first I thought Allen was passive, cowardly, and conservative. Indeed, he was a fool around Lucien. In order to integrate into Lucien's crazy world, he wandered around bars, abandoned his studies, and made strange friends with him, as long as he could change. Come to Lucien’s recognition (like when they named their new poetry club, Allen’s "The New Vision" put forward in Lucien’s heart, when Lucien said "Ginsy, you're hired!" happily, Allen That cheery expression is like a dog touching his head as if he was rewarded by the owner, it’s so silly)
But in fact, there is a rebellious soul deep in Allen's heart (such as questioning the professor in the first class, poetry does not have to conform to those rigid rules, like the free poet Whitman), but it is hidden in layers of shyness and hesitation. Packed, and Lucien was the one who took off the disguise for him, allowing Allen's heart to be unreservedly exposed. Although Lucien's mercilessly wounded body was incomplete because of this, it also liberated his true self.
On the other hand, Lucien, the Meteor Boy who is always in the spotlight, shines in a hurry, just like on a stolen boat that night, Lucien was talking excitedly about the future planned with his other partner Jack. They will Smuggling to the ship to Paris and participating in the liberation movement, they experienced the freedom that Lucien always longed for, but suddenly a dazzling bright light made them unable to hide safely in the dark, and could only be naked under the gaze of the patrol boat. Without the safe zone where he can do whatever he wants, Lucien can only retreat in the corner, warming by the extinguishing flames of the smoke, without the usual arrogance, his trembling voice is like a child who is still in shock after falling into the water:
Now you see it.
I am only good at beginning. On the
contrary, it is Allen, who is usually affected by Lucien's emotions. When he is most vulnerable, he provides thick shoulders for him to rely on:
It's you make it begin, and I have no idea what it would be.
Let's show them what we can do.
You in?
*****
Allen always wanted to save Lucien from the darkness, but the heavy hands on Lucien's shoulders made him fall into the mud, unable to move. In his youth, Lucien met David, who was much older than him, perhaps because of his youth. He lost his father when he was young and yearned for the love of his father, perhaps because of his inferiority complex and attracted by his talents. They had spent a good time together, but as Lucien grew up, he realized that dependence is not true love. However, it is too late. Their two lonely souls have blended together and become an indispensable part of each other's bodies. David's fascination with Lucien becomes obsessive, and he also knows his lover's fragile inferiority complex and controls it with this. His every move may be living in a cage imprisoned by his former lover. Lucien will show his desire for freedom all the time. He almost morbidly wants to destroy the framework of the world, but always when he really wants to act. Fleeing, he hates the dark night with David, but he has a low self-esteem and dare not expose himself to the sun, so Lucien can only evade, he is a fleeting meteor in the sky, and everyone can only amaze his uniqueness , But no one could catch his trace after escaping into the darkness.
*****
I like Allen's love poem for Lucien:
/
Be careful
You're not in wonderland
I've heard the strange madness long growing in your soul
But you are fortunate in your ignorance,in your isolation
You,who have suffered
Find where love hides
Give,share,lose
Lest we die unbloomed
/
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