About 6 years ago, a senior elder sister from the unit said in a chat that she had shared a room with her husband since the birth of her son, and it has been 15 years. At the time I thought it was very incredible. Asking the reason, she said that one is that it takes too much energy to take care of her son, and the other is that she wants to have her own space. I seem to understand. The eldest sister is absolutely optimistic, if she doesn't tell you the true age you will never guess. I like to wear exquisitely crafted Japanese shirts. The jackets and bottoms are usually very eye-catching, big red, big green and big flowers. Such clothes will feel weird when worn on others, but they are extremely harmonious with her. Weave two braids and smile like a little girl. Whether at work or in private, she is full of vitality and enthusiasm.
I was 30 years old and married L for only two years.
The other is J. Once she saw her cousin who had been married for 13 years walking and holding hands, and she laughed at them. The cousin asked her back, how long have you not held hands with F? She opened her mouth and couldn't tell. She has always been an independent and powerful woman. At the time, I felt that she also made me incomprehensible.
I was 32 years old. Going in and out with L, accustomed to holding his hand or holding his arm.
I am 36 years old now. Life goes through three cycles. I have been married to L for 7 years and have known each other for 10 years. Of course they still sleep on the same bed, but the two people live on one side of the two-meter-wide bed. In addition to being too cold in winter, I need to lean on him to keep warm, and occasionally when he squeezes in at night, I will push him hard. I just want to fall asleep comfortably by myself. In the film, every time I see the heroine waking up on a man’s chest with a happy and contented face, I think it’s too fake. Anyone who has slept with his neck crooked for a night feels comfortable?
I think if he proposes to sleep in separate beds at this time, I will definitely raise my hands in favor.
And rarely go shopping with him. Go to the supermarket at most, and must bring a little P child. Usually the two of them hold each other's side, or are put on their necks by him. I will follow. Occasionally, when the two go out, they will go to the left and the other. Crossing the road, he threw away his arms and moved forward, and I looked left and right and followed step by step.
It didn't feel so uncomfortable either.
Occasionally, he would come over and put me on my shoulders intimately. It makes me feel a little strange.
Sometimes I think of it a long time ago in a trance. He walked in front, and I lagging behind to make a phone call. He kept opening his hands back. After the phone call, I will take a few steps to hold him.
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above is the background part. It's a bit long and doesn't cut.
My son had a fever last night, thinking about helping him take his temperature again after he fell asleep, he didn't go to bed right away, and the phone was almost out of power, so I took the IPAD. I need to explain again here: I have no habit of reading books since I removed the lamp. Usually I use a mobile phone, and L uses a tablet or his own mobile phone. The two were plugged in their earphones, and each lived in peace. Sometimes he would recommend a movie to me, saying "Let's watch it together?" "No, I'll watch it myself."
His phone is charging. When I got up to bed, I felt bored and came over to take a look. So, under such circumstances, we watched "Big Hope Hot Spring" together.
This is a reassuring movie. Because there is Aunt Mei, because there is Uncle Tommy, it is also labeled as a light comedy. There is no reason to look bad~~ But after watching it for more than ten minutes, this film reflecting the crisis of middle-aged and elderly marriage made me restless. To be precise, it's because of watching it with L.
After 31 years of marriage together, every day of the thunderous cycle of life is behind a dead-hearted male host and an unwilling hostess. So, the problem came.
After living in separate rooms for a long time, the woman tentatively put on small floral pajamas and went to the man's room. The man looked surprised: Is there anything else? The woman was embarrassed and retreated.
A fixed time, a fixed breakfast, a fixed seat, a fixed expression. It seems that every couple's life style is like this.
At boring family gatherings, women show helpless expressions. People have mixed feelings here. It seems to flash back to the beautiful housewife in "The Covered Bridge", facing the noise of a large table, her heart is overwhelmed.
I feel more and more uncomfortable. In this family, I also saw traces of our existence. ——I often have nothing to say, except for topics about the child; I don’t talk about my feelings to the other party, I will only shout or just shut up cold war when I am so angry; I would rather deliberately misinterpret the other party’s meaning or even deliberately use malicious intentions...
I won’t remind him if he doesn’t wear it properly, because he doesn’t wear what he once prepared for him; he will no longer search for clothes for him, because he will only pick and choose when he buys them; If he has a headache and fever, he will consciously take out the pill and take it, because he would never think of taking you to see the doctor...have
experienced a lot, so he just stopped taking the initiative. Return to the place and protect yourself. Without hope, there is no disappointment.
Fortunately, women are still active in the film. Not only did she know that this was not the life she wanted, but she was also actively looking for ways to change it. As long as the other party in the marriage is working hard, then this relationship will never become rigid. She counts on the marriage expert, and hopes to take this vacation to restore her dying marriage and regain her confidence in life.
Men are repellent at first. But still sat next to her at the last moment of the plane taking off. She can clearly feel her breath of relief. The subsequent expert interviews did not go smoothly, and it could even be said to be difficult. Because they all found that they would face such embarrassing or painful problems after the conversation. Those quiet and silent appearances are actually because too many layers of cobweb dust have accumulated and have been compacted. Now, it needs to be pulled apart layer by layer, pulling the belt fleshy, so that the past that has not yet died can surface and breathe through the dust.
The film gave a large number of fragments to the two men's changes and attempts to sex. It seems that this is the biggest problem they face in their marriage. On this point, it seems a bit far-fetched. The expert asked, when was the last time you ML? The man hesitated and said, probably seven or eight years ago. To be precise, the woman was after her son moved out.
The woman said painfully, what I want is not sex, but love. . .
So next, they hovered on the edge of love and sex. Women awkwardly learn to please men, and men respond like a dragonfly. It seems that their relationship has started from scratch again.
The scene in the hotel was impressive. The man arranged a comfortable and luxurious room. The burning fireplace, the exquisite desserts, the champagne for the occasion, everything is perfect except for a woman who is a little at a loss. The next thing will come naturally.
However, the writer of the word-poor still has to pretend to be a little more pretentious, so that this supposedly perfect sex should be abandoned halfway, which can be said to be an abrupt end. It’s because a woman wants a man to look at her well, look at her old face that has been eroded by the years, and it turns out ||
Thanks to Aunt Mei and Uncle Tommy, otherwise how can this scene continue? . . .
Men and women returned in disappointment. Think, the future of life is like this. The so-called change is just a stupid attempt.
They went back to the old road again. The man continued to watch TV to fall asleep, and the woman Yu Yu even wanted to run away from home all day long.
Still in love. Hearing the woman's depressed cry, the man stood outside the door and turned away. But you can walk in in the middle of the night and tell her that you are so beautiful.
As a result, all the previous problems were instantly resolved. They also had a second marriage. The oath on the beach at the end of the film seems a bit too much, although it has a sensational tear-jerking effect.
How can I live this short and long life, especially if two people spend it together. This has always been a lifelong problem and problem, and it exists in everyone. There is no way out, but I have to find something suitable for myself and each other. In this process, love or not love is gradually becoming blurred, but the only certainty is that with time, you will feel more and more the importance of the company around you. This person will gradually become a part of his body. It may seem like nothing when it exists, but if it is lost, it will be painful to the bones.
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