When I look back on L'AVENIR, I always feel that Natalie's calm, self-sufficient props up the whole movie. She has the resistance of ordinary people when facing the midlife crisis, but she also has insight outside of life. I envy her mental state. Life's sorrows and joys are no different, they're just experiences; I know the spaces I'm familiar with, accept the constraints I have, and walk freely within them. I think this is the so-called state of freedom: in a certain time and space, but not aware of the boundaries of walking; instead of trying to expand one's boundaries and peeping out. What a wonderful kind of ignorance! What I desire is what I create, and desire is what I am, not the future I am actively looking for; the future is really a continuation of the present. I am so self-aware at the same time as ignorant; I never belong to any circumstance, nor will I be affected for long; I have my own spirit (l'esprit), and I am at peace with others.
No matter where I walk the streets of a city or a country, I feel like I belong in this moment. I don't worry about the future, I'm content with the status quo, and nothing is cold. I am well aware that life is often sharp, often restless, and often dull, but none of this makes me doubt the past. I never allow myself to live in the future.
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