What is this fear? Horrified by John's murderous atrocities and psychopaths? Are you afraid of the attitudes you have towards others in the animation? Or fear for the ending—that empty bed, the disappearing John? This feeling is indescribable, it can be said to have all three, or it can be said to be none of the three. In fact, what scares me the most is my own "fear" of the animation, as Berkeley said: "When we perceive an object, we are not perceiving the object itself - we are just experiencing own feelings". This is the so-called psychological energy, the energy of the subconscious, which allows me to map my "fear" of the world and others to the plot and characters in the animation, and this "fear" will be amplified invisibly.
What am I afraid of? There doesn't seem to be anything to "fear" me. But I am clearly aware of a sense of destiny - I have been given a name, and I live with this name, to create wealth for the society, to meet the expectations of my family, to realize my own value - the problem is that I live in this world What's the value on top? Am I fundamentally different from others? Are human lives really equal? (The prototype of Ava Heinemann in the film is said to have believed that "human life is inherently unequal" after many years of changing circumstances.) John and Tianma have different answers to this question. John keeps emphasizing the "after world" he sees - no names, no memories, absolute nothingness. Man is homogeneous only in the presence of death, and even Trakl said: "In those moments of a dying existence, it feels that all people are worthy of love. When awake, you feel The cruelty of the world; there are all your unexplainable faults in it." But Tenma, the brain surgeon who resurrected John twice, revealed in all his actions and words a notion: even if guilty, carry this "Sin" survives, and thus "atonement", Gulima also has a similar concept: there is no happy memory, from now on to create happy memories.
Therefore, this is where Monster John is opposed to Pegasus and Gulima: how to face "despair" as "sin" (Kierkegaard). In fact, every character in the film has fallen into different degrees of "desperation", but John desperately wants to be himself - he is looking for his own name, how can he become a Monster, for the realization of this result He walks into the wasteland alone from the many corpses; while his twin sister, Anna, desperately does not want to be himself, Anna chooses to avoid recalling the reality that she should be a Monster long before the end (her when the doctor hypnotizes her). The performance showed that she was full of hatred and attempted to kill), and finally forgave John and chose to be a lawyer. And their mother's biggest expectation of them was that they would "kill that person" when they grew up, not that they would be happy, healthy, etc., so this brings up a question raised in the film: people can not be selfish to survive?
In my opinion, all people are selfish, people in animation, people in reality. Selfishness is a human instinct, just like the human death instinct. Everyone is for themselves, the world we sink into is our own, and it is a never-ending darkness for anyone else. It is really impossible to "empathize with others" unless you have really had such an experience (I didn't after the Wenchuan earthquake. Any special feeling, no sadness but complete indifference, I once blamed myself for this psychological reaction), so back to the question of the second paragraph, people realize that their existence in the world is "sinful". "Yes, after others also have "sin", what kind of fate do you choose? Is it to accept, or to escape, or to fight against something that is mysterious and cannot be ignored? Do people need to live their lives in order to consider others and ignore their true inner feelings?
I am looking for an answer to my question. Maybe the meaning of keeping me alive and making me grow is in this. Everyone's a Monster, but they're not.
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