Usually I'd say it's very complicated to describe the relationship between me and my mom.
We fight. We misunderstood each other. I was surprised when watching , the fights and conversations all gave me a dejavu that was not commonly shared with the outside world.
In Xavier Dolan's film, he created a third person between the boy and his mom easing the tension between them. I understand why he did that, he's a smart homosexual but still cannot tackle the power scramble game in family relations. Loving is choking, a theme that perhaps water signs can understand.
When at the end, the son manages to run away from the hospital, it seems that Xavier Dolan's finding another way to solve the suffocating relations between the mom and the son, to leave.
But how can we find another way, except to kill and to leave.
I think there are other ways, when the kid grows up, he will have lots of opportunities to see the world. He can make his own decisions and he will have self authority.
I hate authority but eager to be authoritative because there was none in me. I love the island city, probably because we shared the same destiny, looking for a mother not a father. The typical Chinese kind of love exiled us to an end in virtuality . I looked over all the history books, looking for the countries' densities, it was all written by male, it was transcribed to a structure of power wax and wane. There's no history for us exiled, only in poems and in dreams.
Either to claim my authority, or to alert a person I love, I am using a normal way to my mom, the same way as Xivier Dolan. Cause in my imagination, there are none of other ways. I can't fight with her and the system behind her, she won't be able to run away with me, to my virtual land. We hurt each other, ripped out the most disgusting part. But there will be new ways, I hope.
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