The two lines in the movie that touched me the most:
(1) The movie begins with her husband's monologue: "It was the first book she wrote, and I loved it. She wrote: 'One has to learn how to live, and I practice it every day. The biggest obstacle in it is that I don't know who I am Who, I'm groping in the dark. If someone could love me as I really am, maybe I'd be able to understand myself, but the odds of it are slim' I want to tell her, even once, that someone loves with all my heart But I can't say it to convince her because I always miss the point."
(2) Daughter to mother: "Daughter and mother, what a terrible combination, mixed with emotion, confusion, and destruction. Whenever possible, the mother will do whatever she wants in the name of love: the daughter should inherit the mother The grievance of the mother; the daughter should suffer for the mother's failure; the mother's unhappiness, the daughter should feel deeply; it is like the umbilical cord that has never been cut. Mom, is that so? Is the daughter's misfortune the mother's victory? Mom, Have you ever been moved and delighted by my sadness?"
【Feeling】
Selfish people, even if they become parents, will only be selfish parents.
Many people in the world accept marriage and become parents, but when society thinks they should do it, they do it naturally. It never occurred to me that I had the right to choose. Before becoming a parent, you didn't even ask yourself: Do you really want to be a parent? Can you be a parent who truly loves children? Can you be a qualified parent? I think that when you have a child, you are the parents, and when the child grows up, you will have the grace of nurturing. Children grow up without love and patience. In childhood when they longed for and did not get the care they deserved, they only learned to be trembling and worry about gains and losses. Afraid of being ignored and abandoned, the grievances and confusion, in the depths of adulthood, lack of security, fear of loneliness and immersed in loneliness unable to extricate themselves...
The great influence of the family of origin is the development of character. Growing up with people who lack family care, and lack the correct understanding of themselves and the outside world... In short, it is a personality defect. And throughout his life, he must spend his energy to discover and correct this subjective illusion...
In this world, there are mothers who create unhappiness in their daughters' lives to find balance for their own shortcomings in life. In the name of love, they are indifferent and caring, and they are ravaging people's hearts... "Mom, have you ever been touched by my sadness? Coincidence?" This is also my relationship with my mother.
The lesson from my own relationships is this: every gain comes at a price. To have children, you have to pay the price of being a parent. If you can't really give, don't get it easily. So if I don't love my children from the bottom of my heart, or if I'm not sure I have the ability to be a mother who can make my children truly happy, I would rather give up the right to be a mother than to bring an innocent life to the point of no choice. Come to this world. Don't make it clear that you have made the wrong choice, and call it sacrifice, drag yourself down, and harm others. pain each other. Because, for a certain life, some people would rather not be born.
Be responsible to others.
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