This stamina is too great, in order to figure out what was said in one breath, I have been in a trance for three consecutive days, I don't think about tea and rice, and I have no sleep at all. But sadly, I was still stunned. Eva conveys a lot of things, but what makes me so addicted to it is mainly because of the shaping of the three characters, Shinji, Asuka, and Rei Ayanami, and their torn, twisted, and violent inner torment. Especially in the last two episodes, when Shinji completed the completion plan, he was completely dissecting my character! The resonance is too strong. So I disregard my lame writing and confusing logic, and I will record my feelings anyway.
First of all, I like Shinji the most, on the one hand because I have a hopeless protagonist plot, on the other hand, because I am 99.9999996...% similar to him. No ego, habit of escaping, others are hell... I am afraid to have contact with human beings, but live because of the needs of others. He is accustomed to living in isolation, and even yearns to be alone, but his heart is extremely eager for the so-called fetters. Seemingly easy-going, talking with people is the first word, thinking parasitic in other people's words, and habitually apologizing for something wrong. No matter what you do, it's like driving the number 1 machine, taking action when given an order, aiming at the target, pulling the trigger, why what you think is not worth mentioning, and you don't want to mention it, always waiting, waiting to be needed by others, waiting for others to give happiness, a false happiness. Abandoning oneself is like a shoe, life or death is irrelevant, everything is indifferent. Timid and cowardly, because they are afraid of being hurt, they simply stop eating because of choking, cut off the source, hide in their own A·T position, and don't trust anyone. So getting along with others, it looks like a warm breeze, but in fact it is cold and quiet in winter. Therefore, loneliness is the main color of the soul, and there is no desire to polish it.
Such characters are always pushed by external forces in the plot, and several seemingly independent choices are actually part of other people's plans. Self-loathing silence, not good at interacting with others, accustomed to being dependent, always begging for help from others, always holding others accountable, but never saving myself, nor too lazy to help myself. There is absolutely no liveliness and uplifting that young teenagers should have, and it is completely unpleasant, but it is this kind of unpleasantness that shows the most realistic psychological portrait, which is very immersive and empathetic. And I admire Shinji's courage. After completing it, even though I knew that the world is tragic, people's hearts are difficult, and loneliness is the fate of people, I can still find the courage to live in the end. In this respect I am far, far more stingy than he...
Secondly, Asuka, a red-like, enthusiastic and lively girl, contributed the only bright color to this tragic show. But in fact, she is just like red, full of restlessness, including the innate fear of blood red. Unlike Shinji's extreme inferiority complex, she is so confident and conceited that she has a clear pursuit, that is, to be the best and brightest. But in fact, they are all self-deficient, heart-wrenching children. The shadow of childhood shrouded his whole life, when his life was dying and his consciousness was blurred, the remaining consciousness was still committing suicide, and he was still struggling in the raging fire. It is also the pursuit of oneself in the hearts of others, and there is nothing but eva. The heart has been cut in half by the world in which it lives, and the blood is dripping, but I would rather watch it rot than easily accept the healing of others, and escape everything under the mask of whitewashing peace. Having said that, I have to mention that it was shocking when I watched it, and when I recalled it, it made me gasp for breath, and the sadness and despair reached the musculature of the Biandian. That is, in "Sincerely For You", the orange juice plan was completed. In the world where Shinji resets, In the blood-red seaside, "Adam" of the new world is holding "Eve" by the neck. This scene, in my opinion, is the most desperate picture in the entire eva series. Asuka realizes the completion of her soul in half of her mother's soul, and she no longer needs others as a comparison to gain herself. But Shinji still did not find the other half of his heart. In the cruelty and blood of the new world, the only thing he could rely on was the girl in front of him who refused to save him, although under Asuka's touch, he released his hands and barely found the weak Hope is her compassion, but is this weak life signal really enough to support the fragile him? Self-denial and disgust, the inner darkness and death still lingered in his heart, just like Asuka's cold, word-by-word "You're disgusting"
In the end, there is Li Li, who is worth a thousand dollars in a smile. As a "fake in human skin", the basis for her survival is a bond if it is good, and the order of Lao Ikari if it is ugly. But she is not a pure robot, she also has emotional sustenance and a clear individual consciousness, which is what she said in the psychological trial in the last two episodes of the TV version "I want to die, what I want is despair, I want to return to Nothingness, but no" In this girl who is always asking me who I am, I see the dead end of freedom, that is, people always need fetters to survive.
In my opinion, these three people are actually three avatars of one person, a multi-faceted representation of the past, present, and future miniaturized to the same time dimension. What Shinji seeks is how his actions will be evaluated by others, which is generally a form of expectation. Because Asuka attaches great importance to self-expression, she pursues a sense of reality that is effective, so she is impatient and seeks direct pleasure. She cannot understand the implicit and gradual thinking of neon gold. reality. Li is living in the bondage "created by the past time and the relationship with others", which is a portrayal of people who are constantly entangled in the past and difficult to escape. No matter what form it is, in their painful and deranged spiritual world, loneliness and despair accompany them, and the resulting abandonment and disgust of self are the things that resonate with me the most.
Finally, I personally think that the TV version and "Sincerely For You" are my two favorites. The grand worldview construction, the meticulous and step-by-step narrative rhythm, and the excavation and presentation of human loneliness all make me feel hatred for each other. Night.
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