ending is a game that perfectly pierced the tragic truth, watching the movie only Embarrassed and embarrassed. And without this game, everything seems to be business as usual, and the truth will be buried forever. Life is still as good as it seems.
I remember that there was a similar topic in the strange flower talk, probably about whether to look at the partner's mobile phone or not. I vaguely remember that Ma Weiwei also had a golden sentence, the general idea was: "Partners say that a woman is a man's rib, do you talk about privacy with your rib?"
I don't remember what I argued, but then I felt that This sentence must be just debating skills. Honesty seems to be a good quality, but it also has a blade, which cannot be used all the time.
Don't get me wrong, if I were on the right side of the scale, I would probably choose honesty. I always feel that people’s hearts are inherently complicated, and those who understand with just one look are very few. You and I both think we understand, but in fact, what we think is not the same thing at all. Even if they are honest, there are very few people who can understand each other, so why bother to hide and go around in circles?
However, it is another matter when it comes to the relationship between partners and a Pandora's box such as a mobile phone.
Leaving aside the out-of-context misunderstandings brought about by mobile phones, these misunderstandings also seem to be explained clearly in the movie. As long as your partner isn't most of the people who are stubborn and worried, as long as he/she can escape the inevitable innate jealousy in love that makes a lot of fuss, and as long as there is a firm trust between you, Candor doesn't seem so scary.
When does confession become hesitant? Let's talk about untested human nature. After watching the happy ending as usual at the end of the movie, I kept asking myself a question: Can everything continue happily without revealing these secrets?
The answer is unexpected: it may not be happy, but it can still continue.
Of course, there will still be various problems between them, derailment may still be discovered, and life is still not harmonious, but everything may be able to continue without knowing and pretending not to know.
In human nature, where there is light, there is shadow, and there is always that side that we don't like that can't stand torture. Husbands who have cheated in the past may also sincerely hold his wife's hand to look at the moon, and this is not false at this moment. Do you want to continue this kind of marriage and love?
I don't know if the ideal marriage and love really exist, but I know that everything in the movie is in line with human nature and can happen, and maybe not a word of love can resist.
Speaking of this, I remembered a sentence I read before: "Hundreds of good and filial piety are the first, discuss the heart regardless of traces, and the poor have no filial sons; If you look at people's morality and love with your heart, you will be disappointed. However, there must always be basic standards to measure, and human nature cannot be an excuse for all faults.
As for where the standard is, I'm afraid it's a matter between the two people, and there is no judgment on right or wrong.
If you insist on staying with this person for the rest of your life, I am afraid that being honest is really not a good idea. After all, the illusion is softer, like a placebo. But if you have higher expectations for love and marriage, the problem may not be just honesty or dishonesty. Perhaps honesty is just the right time to cut it off.
In order not to break up because of honesty, the premise of honesty that must be considered is probably to be able to accept the imperfection of love. After all, the practice of life is nothing but striving for the better side. Originally, it was difficult to establish trust, and to disintegrate it with doubts and tests is really worth the loss.
Not to mention the frankness of sharing a mobile phone, if it is passive, it is undoubtedly stupid. The reason for this is probably that whether it is intentional or the fact that it has already happened, it has become a problem that has to be solved under the sun, and they may have been self-sufficient in the self-control of the human heart.
Like the "don't send messages like this again" husband in that undisclosed ending.
So you see, the "candor" verified by exchanging mobile phones is something else entirely.
To be able to feel truly magnanimous and unashamed, you don't have to look at your phone. The candor in this kind of relationship is not to verify anything, but to let both parties understand each other better. If I can accept the imperfection of the other person, accept the love that is not 100% ideal, and be calm and tolerant, I will also feel that honesty will make love happier.
But ask yourself, when you love someone, can you really not worry, be nervous, and be jealous? It seems that even if it is confirmed that there is no selfishness, the relationship with the ex is unpleasant, isn't it?
Of course, if you can consider the other person's state of mind more in love, it seems that this is not a big problem.
But, this kind of love is more and more ideal. If you can't do it, it seems that it is better to hide the things that make the other party unhappy with goodwill.
Active frankness also needs to be reconsidered. Passive verification-style "frankness" should be avoided.
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